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Amelia Nov 2014
He holds me near the keys
I sit on his knee
playing asian melodies
with the black keys on white
I fall asleep to his unique melodies of the night.

Easter time, I remember Louis
he came to our home on King Street
what wonderful feathers, and lovely tweet
Louis would fly free, the wood banister is his seat.

Large tomatoes grew outside,
She would go there to hide,
in the sun, crouched down, tending the flowers
looking after me almost every hour.

Polish pottery set on the table.
wooden spoons and soup ladel.
Her lovely flower crown, and white gown
the chapel bell’s sound
I hope my wedding can be
as beautiful as this one was across the sea.

She curled my hair often, barrettes, and bows
for first communion and theater shows
She wore long skirts, long hair
and an irish hat she would wear.
We thought she dressed funny,
But now I wear her greek cape

We shared a small room
I would hear him breathe softly
when morning would loom.
we danced wildly to NSYNC
and giggled and played
how sad I am--things have changed.

Four of us, together forever
nothing can tear us apart, never.
and now I wish I had kinder things to say
my family so beautiful
the memories, like the most lovely song
I always want to hear--
so I won’t be far, so our hearts can be near.
Amelia Jun 2014
The thrill
The emotion i feel
When I see those city lights
The wind of the freeway
The paradox of insignificance yet
Empowerment.
The deep night sky and the speed
Millions of souls
Gathered in this place
The glows and gathering of us
Traveling all so fast
Around and through this city
Connecting rejoining passing and colliding
All different ways on the freeway
Amelia Jun 2014
I don't really know
Where do my thoughts
Really explore and where
Do my thoughts really soar

Where does this glee reside
Why don't I miss the part
That died
The boy who I loved
But he simply shoved
Me out and I'm fine

But I want to soak up silence
And seep down to its core
And I want to learn more

I yearn for
Endless adventures
Night skies and endless laughter
Someone's embrace and a fast pace.

Creativity sits idle
And my mind focuses on
Nothing of nourishment
And grows dull in
The glow of the screen

Let new ideas come forth
And let my mind rejoice in
It's own unique beauty
Be
Amelia May 2014
Me: fly away, leave him be
let the pain drift with the sea
let your heart  feel
deep and real
always be honest
love waits the longest

him: love waits the longest
and lust stays dishonest
pain drifts with the sea
so it spreads to the world
sun shining in cali
but my heart is cold and feels old
not broken tho, barley
beating its weak
true love is what we need n seek
but until then I will swim the sea
broken drifting looking for the
the fish that truly loves me

Me: the fish wasn't ready
for the love we shared
but we risked and dared….
in each others arms
it was my complete nirvana
the sun shining
I want to tear my heart out
and not to have to feel it again
your heart grew cold
because of the lies I told
but you only see a lying ***
and theres more to this soul
first love who explored my heart
and wrote on its walls
now it feels like an empty hall
because u walked away
and now I am left with this place
a place you filled and had
but I will try and swim in the sea
and let my spirit be
let it be free
find nothing or no one
but find me.
Amelia Apr 2014
I am in a disoriented dream.
too young to know,
twenty years have passed
almost two years
and you were there or almost near.

its because i'm confused
or i don't understand--
my being in yours

why the moon shines so bright
and I exist this certain way.
but you took me to a place

inside four small walls,
one small space, a tub, a mirror
one bed, near the hills
of San Gabriel and the concrete

We sat in a tree and jumped a fence
but emotions ran too high
and I never added up quite right
in your mind--

My words spoiled the truth
and they stained the trust
they weaved together anger
and spilled tears

We wanted and tried
so hard for love,
I relied on you
you relied on me

yin and yang
we sat, interconnected
yet opposing each other
our energies combining
and combating

We sipped a bottle of sky
in the friendly El Monte
I left your side, I've left your side
too many times..

but you came back
pounding on the door of the Scenic
, your there and
I never want to let go again

and your body feels perfect next to mine
never wanting to leave
that bed
wanting to drift back to sleep
in your arms

but we leave this place,
The Scenic becomes
a memory
and now thats all thats left.
hoping you might still remember me.
Amelia Apr 2014
Final today, final tomorrow
no studying, mind scattered.
heart beating.

I dialed.
Why?
I was moving on so nicely
or was I tricking myself quietly?
I dialed.

I heard your voice and i melted.
everything I felt
came rushing back with the warm tears

the stitch I was slowly making
all torn away to a fresh wound
the feelings awakened
the pain echoing in the silence

I am sorry for the lies.
I spit on your fragile heart
and the trust you invested into me.

Sorry I dialed you up.
sorry i brought pain
to your beautiful heart.
  Apr 2014 Amelia
DarkDepriment
...
Why must you haunt my dreams
           & invade my mind
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