I've been hit again.
My mind
suddenly begins to think
how do I get away
I am cornered.
not yet I tell myself.
After the beating finishes,
(Only because they are tired now)
I walk painfully to my room.
My ***
feels like it's been shot.
My body
feels like it has been pulled apart twice.  
I sit down,
lift my mattress,
the blade lies here.
I look at it, craving its sharp clarity.
My wrists are the matching fit.
Cut cut
I think.
No one will miss me anyhow
I think.
But then
I imagine people's faces,
when they hear the news.
When they hear
how despicable the idea was
that I killed myself.
I don't lift my blade.
I let it rest.
"Till next time, friend"
I whisper to it.
I cannot speak,
my mouth has been punched in so many times,
It is as if the great pyramid rests on my lips.
My skin is raw,
carpet burn everywhere.
I tried to get out.
I really did
Like the blade,
I want to be sharp,
yet feel so dull.
Though I have not,
my heart has already killed itself.
Time
is not of the essence
anymore
No
Never again.
I will not
let them take this life.
That's my job
And quite frankly,
Im not ready just yet
So I will keep hanging on.
Just a little at a time.
I will let myself fall,
that way I can learn how
to pick myself up
all by myself.
Yes,
I do not need the blade.
I am Strong.
Strong
Strong
Strong.
*hope

The darkest places
somehow end up seeming like the brightest places.
The dark
places the light on subject.
I grew up in the dark
though not literally,
my whole life has been in the dark.
I've lived in it for half my life.
Abuse is a dark thing,
but instead of fearing it,
I decided to embrace the darkness.
I do not fear the dark,
shadows bow to me.
******' right I'm crazy.
I make the dark bend to light.
So be careful when you approach my territory,
because the darkness will fill your body,
leave you to die,
like it did to me
but I resurrected myself
in the darkness
So don't be afraid.
I am in the dark with you.
And I don't plan on leaving
*anytime soon

I don't really know you
and you've never been close to me
I've never even met you
but sometimes you message me

I'm 13 years younger
but I never seemed to wonder
why you never knew
until one night my dad found you

he hasn't seen you for years
but he never thought this day would come
where he could know his first daughter
even though you are no longer the only one

A is for how AMAZING you are.
B is for how BEAUTIFUL your soul is.
C is for CARING like your heart of solid gold that is caring
D is for DIRECT like how your honesty makes you direct.
E is for how ELOQUENT your words are.
F is for how FANTASTIC you make me feel.
G is for the GRAVITY that pulls me towards you.
H is for HAPPY as in how you made me so happy.
I is for INDESCRIBABLE.... I don't know what to write.
J is for JOYFUL, in other words how you make me feel.
K is for KIND, you are the most kind-hearted person in this universe,
L is for LIFT, what you do to my spirits everyday.
M is for MUSICAL, as in how your soul sings a song.
N is for NATURAL, for the way I can talk to you so naturally.
O is for OPEN like how you make me feel so open towards you.
P is for PASSION, the thing inside you when you talk about your interest.
Q is for QUARTZ, as in how your soul is a gem like mineral.
R is for RAD as in your personality is rad.
S is for SORRY sorry for this piece......
T is for THANK as in thank you for entering my life
U is for UMBRELLA, no real reason just couldn't find a U word
V is for VIOLIN, you make me unafraid to admit my music experience.
W is for WONDERFUL as in your personality is wonderful
X is for X-RAY like how I'm not afraid to show you my inner thoughts.
Y is for YOU , you are, beautiful, amazing and it all starts with YOU.
Z is for ZEBRA, you see colour when others see black and white.

The ALPHABET is to show you that 26 letters is never enough to describe just how amazing you really are. Sadly there are only 26 letters in the alphabet , if there were 200000 I'm sure they still would not be enough to describe you. So I will describe you in four words.

KIND, AMAZING BEAUTIFUL,**AWESOME