That's the thing with humans. We now no longer believe in the existence of simpler things. As we grow up we realise that everything has depths. We are so very surrounded by such things that we have forgotten how simple life actually is. It's sad how people get angry at minute matters but don't even care to smile at the beautiful little things around them.
We've forgotten how it's the little things that matter, how there is so much more to life than just paper.
Whether it's your answer sheet or the currency you use. It's not at all complicated to be honest.
We've just forgotten. It's all very simple actually. Leave aside everything that frustrates you and take a sip of that nice chilled glass of your favourite wine or a nice warm bath or just a little glance up at the sky from your rooftop to get you going.
Get a reality check.
Do what makes you happy.
Let your happiness be more than just momentary.
Let it be reflected from your soul.
**- Aks, Naked & Human.

Into the oblivion, regret is all he sees,
This is not who he is nor who he wants to be.
In all the truths and in all the lies,
Alone he stands in the rain, a lonely guy.
Not a soul can hear him scream nor hear him cry.
Alone he stands and alone he dies.
.
Time and time again I'm brought back to these halls.
So sore full the pain and I've been through it all.
As hidden as the faithfulness of the stars,
So everlasting are those ungrateful scars.
.
Everyone that I know is as much reckoning,
I know it's me even hell is beckoning.
I guess this is the moment, now is the time.
I can feel the vines of darkness taking over my mind,
Indecisively making it's way out of harm and out of sight.
But, god almighty. I ain't leaving this easy, not without a fight.
.
Already dead no more can I die,
I guess it's about time I went back to the dark side.

- Aks, *Old Diaries.

"Hah. I wish I was an alcoholic. So every now and then I could remind you all of the things that I've done for you.
All the pain & hardships that I had to go through. All the sacrifices that I had to make.
Just to have all of my expectations torn apart by you.
I wish I could twirl my whiskey the same way you twirl me with your fingers. I wish you would realised just how lucky you are.
But out of everything I wish you'd realise all of those things by yourself.
If you'd take some of your dear time out of your own problems and maybe, just maybe ask me how my day was. Cause right now I'm on the brink of going back to that 'dark' place. A point where one would consider me twisted and deranged,
The worst kind of person you could find.
Oh, how I wish you would realise every little thing that I've done and consider me more than just an option.
Don't try to deny that.
All of this time I've been nothing but committed to you.
If only you'd have realised it much sooner, I wouldn't have to leave.
All those nights when you were alone and you'd call me up and I'd try my best to be there on the line with you. All those times when you needed someone and I'd text you back in just a few minutes no matter where I was or what I was doing. All those nights I'd make sure you didn't go to bed upset. All those times I fought with people I loved & cared for, for you. All those times I did things for you without you knowing.
All those times I tried not to love you.
I want to let you onto so many things but all you give me is disappointment and heartbreaks and I can not tell you these either because I want you to figure these out yourself, how much it is that you're hurting me, and how far it is that I am willing to go for you.
I don't want to tell you these things and force you to do things for me.
I am tired of being a shadow.
I am tired.
I am tired of you.
I wish I had another toxic to help me gulp you down other than yourself."
**- Aks, Alcoholic //Naked Emotions.

When we walked our way into the night, I expected a galaxy to be laid out for us, bestowing a universal mistletoe for us.
But there we were, counting whatever little bright spots we could find. Well, at least until I looked upon at you.
Star filled eyes.
Gods had something else planned in for me.
I was finally gazing at those holy celestial bodies. As they orbited around your pupils and left me shaken. Yes, shaken.
What kept me elated was the fact that you were there with me.
But that evening only those lonely hands could meet, and not lips.
But I swear I would've stayed a lifetime there if I could.
***, I'm some serious **** and you got a nice derrière.
- Aks, Interstellar Interconnection

"Paint me a dead body tonight". When you paint you are at your utmost emotional level. There is absolutely nothing you care about other than getting that image that's in your mind on the piece of canvas. That image that is haunting your mind and will continue to do so until you lay it out on that heavy duty plain-woven-fabric.
It's like when you paint you don't feel anything.
Not the hunger.
Not the fatigue.
Not the thirst.
Cause that's when you pour your true feelings and emotions out and sketch and color and oh my, darling do you paint.
You have a gift.
Cause when you paint it's not the body which is making the art, it's the soul. So tonight, let your soul out once more. Let your body - a mere cocoon - be left behind. Fly away one more time tonight, my love.
"Play with my **** & bare canvas,
Play well with my fear & fright.
Sketch me another ******, honey.
Paint me another dead body tonight."
-Aks, Paint me a dead body.

You ask why and innumerable thoughts traffic in my mind rebelling to come out, to give you a piece of themselves.
But, do you really deserve it?
Do you have that right to know?
Is it true that you, a mere human - all skin, blood and bones deserve even a scent of the misery that I bestow?
All I am is scared.
Frightened to be vulnerable, afraid at the thought of being judged by the one I trusted, and terrified to lose them.
So promise me you would not leave, and prove it. Stay.
Gaze at the stars with me while we drive away all through the night.
Imprint me in yourself.
Believe me, trust me & love me.
Even when I'm pointing a gun at you.
Even when I ****, ****** or slaughter.
Even when you think I have changed.
Don't.
Don't believe that.
'Tell me about my origins,
teach me of my past.
Enlighten me my virtue,
and firework my path.'
But don't you dare leave the passenger seat.
For I will come back from hell if I had to, to hunt you down, while being what you feared I wouldn't. A nightmare.
So do not lie.
Do not break any promises.
Do not walk away from our drive.
Our drive.
Or I'll skin you alive.
Maybe I'll marinate you, cook you, season you & have a fancy dinner as well.
All of this while dining underneath the stars.