A palindrome is letters or sequences
that read the same both forwards and backwards
I often think of our love as a palindrome
what we had
was a palindrome love
no start nor end
but always the same
whether read from start to finish
or finish to start
I pray one day I'll stop moving in back and forth sequences
I hope one day
we both only move forwards

I don't have much to apologize for
but I never meant to hurt you
I've grown accustomed to believing mine is the only pure heart left
in the midst of my own destruction
its hard to believe anyone has any good intentions left
I know you love me
but my heart has become so rock solid
even your fragile eyes
couldn't melt the border
I created


- I miss you, everyday.

Sometimes
Its hard for me to accept that some people have no goodness
within them
some people don't need a sad story to make them evil
some villians eat love for breakfast
some demons were never gods angels
everytime I took a trip down your rabbit hole I ended up with scraped knees and madness in my veins
I drove myself crazy trying to find a light through the tunnel
I searched every dark corner only to uncover more darkness
Truth is there is no explanation for why your hands are so cold
I burned through every candle of my own trying to light your fire
Yet I still woke up alone
and freezing
I never did find the light I was looking for
Instead, I lost my own

I know you think I'm the girl you've been looking for
I'm not you see,
I'm the storm
I'm the girl your mother warns you about
The girl that will ruin your life
Regret is laced in my blood
Heart break is tangled in the tips of my slitting hair
They name hurricanes after girls like me because they know all the disaster I leave
I'm the lion, never the lamb
My teeth are snarling and when they find nice boys to bite on they don't know how to let go until something has been ripped to pieces
I've tried to learn to be soft but you see I was born the storm
I'm the drug you don't want I'm the poison you really don't need
My snake bite heart ejects venom with my kiss then soon enough my boiled blood will be all over your best pair of Sunday shoes
I've never been a drizzle no matter how hard I try because I'm a ******* thunder rolling lighting cracking storm
I cannot calm the waves in my soul
Or the bombs in my words
I cannot shut of the earthquake that is me, it's been shaking my world since I was 5
I cannot love you right
Some girls are the beach but I'm a forest fire, come any closer and I will burn you alive
I know I'm beautiful in a tragic way
I know you think I'm the girl you've been looking for
I'm sorry
I cannot love you
I am the storm

7 months
You held me like I was the only thing you needed in order to start living
7 kisses
On the first date, laughter was shoved so far down our throats, no one could remove that happiness if they tried
7 more weeks
Before the first "I love you" escaped from your cracked lips, in a whisper so quiet I was afraid your words would break in the air
7 hours
Laying with you, tangled limps, tracing the universe on your back, the pads of my fingers placed my world in your hands
7 dates missed
I guess I no longer existed because now you stand at a distance and I can't even hear your voice over the phone anymore
7 screaming fights
Swears across the room, hands in the air, tears hit the floor, while our love is getting torn at the seems and the corners are quickly folding in on us
7 feet
Away from me as I watched you look at her, I know that look because I used to get that look from the same pair of eyes that belong to you and are now looking at her. You're flashing a smile that could make planets separate and somehow I have to come to terms with the fact that smile no longer belongs to me.
7 minutes
How long you took to break my heart with tidal waves in my eyes as I'm on my knees begging you to stay. My lungs no longer remember the taste of air, my hands shake like they did the first time you looked at me. My lips no longer remember the taste of your kiss all I taste is acid from thinking about you touching her with the same hands you used to hold me.
7 months ago
You held me like I was the only thing you needed in order to start living
-A.R

I know girls who go through boys like they did toys on the playground
I know girls who pick at their skin and pull at their hair
I know girls who look so hard for love they give out their heart like it's extra change
I know girls who split their skins to stop the pain
I know girls who are so angry they are hateful, even mean
I know girls throw up in the bathroom after lunch, pretending no one heard them when they come out
I know girls with the universe in their eyes yet they can't see a star
I know girls who give themselves away to feel like someone cares
I know girls who hate their moms
I know girls who hate their dad
And I know girls that would rather die then be caught wearing a dress
I know girls who take too many pills, girls who party a little too hard
I know girls with strait A's since they were 6
I know girls who have panic attacks
There are girls with bones and girls with curves
Girls with hearts as cold as stone
But even with all the types
All the girls
We're all the same
Same love in our hearts
Same soul buried beneath layers of our skin
Truth is
We're all hurt
We all need each other
Girls need girls to get through what girls go through