12:53am*
The car clock blinks at me
i feel its judgement through green digit numbers
I cannot remember if it is running fast or a few minutes behind
but I know the bars are starting to close
and apartment lights begin to die off
I accidentally think of you
as I purposely forgot to secure my seat belt
headlights off, i peel out
the cracked screen of the stereo stares
reminding me that I must deal with my screaming thoughts
with no ****** pop songs to hide behind

I still taste it on my lips, a whiskey kiss
but how long has it been since my lips have touched yours?
I calculate the hours
and my speedometer climbs
the line of trees smear into a blur of brown
I drift onto 26 from 45, coast on 322
bear right until i don't know where the **** I'm going
roads like veins winding around to endless possibilities
       but this telephone pole look so **** inviting


you were the one who helped me to learn the color of my eyes
but now my bleary blues shift to passenger seat
to see nothing but a pack of 27s
I expect the seat belt alarm to sound
but then I remember that it's not you
i toss the warning label away
how can something be so toxic
when the exterior is wrapped in gold
but i still feel your tarnish in my lungs

I miss the turn to my house
so i decide to drive on
inching closer and closer to you
wherever the hell that is
as my gas supply dwindles
i hope it's coming into my lungs


I pull over and throw up out the drivers side window
the strain of my gut is not enough
to rid you of my system
if only my body recognized you as a toxin a few months sooner
but God knows
no hangover will ever keep me from coming back