Lipsticks, painted red
      A smile on my face,
              Not seen before,
     Take a big swig from a bottle,
Drink more and more
      Until I end up on the floor
     Finally the *memories are gone
When my sanity walks out the door

        I'm now on the ceiling,
   Though quite possibly dreaming,
My thoughts are far from clearing
            In muddled moments
    I find comfort and forget
             No longer chained
      Or to my own head in debt

Swishing the thoughts around my mind
    Like a good year of
         fine white wine
   Spitting out the rotten ones
Swallowing down a few,
        just for fun
     Intoxication at its finest,
Brazen, daring, brave and bold
           Leaving the past behind us
     Out in the bitter cold

          Frozen behind,
   No longer catching up to me
     I can stumble forward
            In my plastered euphoria
     A smile on my face
I can pick up my pace
         Audacious now, I feel
Doesn't matter how much of this is real

Reality is just in my mind
           Not easily defined
    By dreams, nightmares or ghosts
             From the past
       Reality is in this bottle,
                This pipe, or this needle
     Down to the very last
Drops of fantasy and candy
                   But ****,
           *It tastes so sweet

porcelain skin chipping away,
thick and durable, but still decays;
eyes of class ricocheting, stars dying bright:
scratches seem to never fade,
the wound is deep,
but inner pattern stays.
lasts longer than the marble tile,
will ever a sock slip down these miles?

(NJ2014) all rights reserved.

Silence...
Then...a swirling tornado, a child crying...Silence.
A waterfall so loud it echoes across the land - infinite drops of water...
Falling, crashing, being born and ****** into a whirlpool - a community of water...
Silence...
Silence so loud it can drive you mad...
Fast transportation - no patience for the journey.
Trying to catch up to the speed of time only to fall short.
Into a white lighted silence...
Love, overwhelming as the water falling into the river. Embracing, caressing...
Darkness - overwhelming as the feeling of drowning...

"Do you hear me? Do you see me? Can you ever understand who I spent my life trying to be?"

Happiness is elusive and unfamiliar when the lights are out, the silence screams and there is nothing anyone can say or do to help you.
Peace can be impossible when the voices are angry and the smiles are few.  
Can you understand how far one falls without being able to see the bottom?
Can you ever truly comprehend the madness in the silence, in the darkness, in the room with no walls only windows?
Silence...
Silence so violent one can never be safe in the safety of her arms.
She cannot understand - she did no harm but she can do no good for you.  
In the dark...
Silence...
A swirling wind, a tornado - the evening never ends and the cold wind never warms.  

"Do you hear me? Can you remember who I was? Can you ever understand that sometimes an ending is the only remedy for an endless drop, a free-fall, in the dark..."

///
Look! My friend
It is true that
my existence will be graved after death-
you forget me,
as speed squander particle existence--
earth could not remember--
either it will be deformed
or dissolved---

Memory decays as rolling stone-
forget and fade
twinkle childhood,
as daffodils wither at evening---

Today's child
the father of tomorrow
Aye reminisces the past and decide the future,
today's peppy stream with its chime,
tomorrow's buried river-
only articulate history

Civilization, culture and fashion,
those are transfigured by time-
I see, truth has grown as a lie
as the sun rises in the west,
men have made the conversion to lie-
as politics become poly tricks-

Igneous to metamorphic rock,
by the process of nature with time-
the ultimate truth

From summer to winter,
winter to spring -
pouring--
Sweet sweat-
snowflakes-
cuckoo sings
season changeover and being--

But aftermath
my friend,
two things are still ******,
untouched,
my love--
my soul--
the power of God----
///
@Musfiq us shaleheen

You're hiding all your sins in me. All your urges and twisted thoughts and deviance. You're trying to unleash it all on me, stain me with the filthiest parts of your mind, and blow off the steam and anger you try to keep so far inside yourself. You're taking all the scary, *****, unnatural parts of yourself and forcing them all on me, so you can keep yourself clean for her. So you can be her guardian angel, her knight in shining armor. Without blackened wings, or being covered in blood and oil. Stay the **** away from me. I don't need this. I don't, I really don't. You're trying to push all your darkness off on me, all the taints of lust and violence and anger and sadism that you don't want her to see. You can't do this forever. So keep adding to your own suffering. Have your shining little princess and your throne of ****. It'll all come down someday.