I loved you before
we kissed

before I saw the way that
moonlight sat on your
soft features

I wanted you before
you held me in your arms

before our legs entwined
making a sculpture that
would stand the test
of time

I think I loved you
before I ever learnt
to love myself

you were the first person
to show me kindness
and I took my fix of it
just like any drug

I think I loved you
before we were even born

Leave me alone
I was alone anyway
I have no one,
everything is meaningless

I’m so tired and sore,
don’t want to go to
work anymore,
but if I have to
can I come in at four
and leave an hour before
my regularly scheduled
night shift ends.

Why do I feel numb
Watching the world
Listless in sight
Because I only see it in black and white

Colors are washed out of my eyes
And every light in me has died
All I see are smiles as frowns
Because I only see them upside down

Love songs don’t have any meaning
For a person who is trapped in their mind
Love can attempt to come my way
And I will just glance and walk away

Storm clouds cries and fills the ocean
But my salty tears competes with emotion
Filling the ocean ten times till tomorrow
That the ocean will be overwhelmed with sorrow

In the end,
I try a superficial smile
And try to fool myself for awhile
But as much as I try
There is nothing left inside
Because everything in me
Can’t seem to come alive

Love does not have to
be perfect, it only has
to be shared with you

8:28 PM
9/8/19

I loved you to a point where,
Even the atheist in me,
Prayed, for your safety.
Prayed, for your dreams.
For I may have forgotten religion,
But loving you brings it back.