To say I've been
Compromised
Would be a
Judgment
Of morality
These are simply
Desires
Involving
Cyber
Infidelity

But how can I
Close my eyes
Move on
And just live
Now that I have fallen
For a Beautiful Poetess
Named Liz?

It's not there any longer
That sparkling loving glow
I see you reaching out for
Someone else to hold...
You've an itch deep beneath
Scratch it as you may
I will write this unread poem
And bleed another day!

Not unlike the rest of you
I was placed here
From beyond
Set adrift into this realm
Forced to be as one

The wreckage of my landing
The misery of my birth
We can never hope to be
More than what comes first

Holding on to misery
Somewhere deep within
It finds it's way up to the suffice  
Every now and then

Beyond the realm
Of gravitational pull
We shall break away
From the natural rules
Until then
Keep our Mother safe
After all
We are all together in this
Twirling through
Outer space
...

This world can causes such sadness
Such suffering I cannot bear
Yet I drove her to her madness
And then I left her there

Close the world, shut out the sky
Allow this day to pass and die
‘Til the dreamer drifts to sleep
Take it now this soul you seek

Your eyes ask the questions why
My shame has no answer
She haunts me late at nights
The tiny little dancer

So far from being whole
Now my days are growing cold
Won’t be long until the reap
Now the dreamer drifts to sleep
.....

Have you ever truly tried
To change your mind
Of all those ways
We're taught to think

Like how to measure human life
On a blueprint of love and hate
All those years of fairy tales
Invisible spirits tied to fate

Have you ever questioned
Your mother's sighs
Or your father's
Heated rage

How could we have navigated
Through the darkness
Of our youth
Freshly developed brains
Washed in vintage child abuse

But here and now
Is where it starts
The evolution of our hearts...

Our lives are on an endless journey
Bound for a mysterious cognitive end
Come and take this hand of abandon
I promise, I’ll never leave you again

Blown down are these walls of inflexibility
Dissolved in acceptance my life’s resent
Exposed by love these insecurities
Resolved to you my true intent…

"All of us beings"
Believing we're free
Have We?
Could We?
Been tricked or deceived?

We boldly live our lives
And somehow we believe
That we understand the path
Upon this existential sea

But wisdom dictates different  
Nothing can last forever
Especially at this rate
Where nothings getting better
+

Imagine if you could sense
Where a loved one was
Or even when a loved one was in distress From far, far away!

But then I thought to myself
How would technology
Ever stand a chance to climb
To sore into
Enlightenment!

And so I pulled my product off the shelf
And destroy the patent

It’s good thing Procter & Gamble
Didn’t get their hands on that one.

We weather the storms
Standing tall in the wind
Holding tight to our dreams
We break or we bend

Existing is simple
It's living that's hard
We collect life's lessons
And save them in jars

In the heaviness of hearts
We begin to fade
Losing parts of ourselves
Along the way

Still we stand tall
Holding as tight as we can
Somehow growing stronger
In the inevitable end...

Talked with my psychologist today
Come to find out
I am afraid of being sober!
I experience my emotions
Far too intensely
I begin to hyperventilate
White noises fills my head
Involuntary muscle spasms
Heart pounding in my chest
Deep breaths, meditation
Better yet medication
My empathy is an open wound
  Quiet! Concentrate on your legs......

Would you please
Stay awhile with me
Unleash the shadows
Let the darkness free
Ride the waves
In creative bliss
Don't lose hope
Life is a risk

Release your glands
In chemical reactions
Nurtured in nature's
Raw naked passions
Thunder bolts
In the power of pens
Let it all out
And let us all in

Please stay
All of you, my friends!

I'm always afraid
I'm never sure why
I simply push my
Irrational fear's
Down deeper inside

Dreaded night
One eye open
Nightlight on
Shadows dancing
Into the dawn

But in the day
That's when I pray
All of this beauty
Please let me stay!

Am I a poet or a writer
Am I a wise man or a fool
The answer is all of the above
Yes it feels good to be popular
But what glory is there in hiding
The vastness of our other mindsets
I feel more than empathy
I feel pain, anger, resentment
I am happiness and sadness
Wrapped in one mind and so much more
My writings are different parts of who I am
My legacy of writings
Beautiful, messy, vague
****** up or strangely weird
As they seem
Are parts
Of the whole me
The real me...

To tell me twice
When eye's have said enough
I've read between the unwinding lines
I've no need for less than love

The twitch, the look
Uneven flow
Rest assured
I already know

  And be sure
That they do too
The rest is up to you
Unto thine own self be true
....

No one can keep up
with the evil deeds
done in our names.

When I was but one
Trapped in this verse
Clinging to the lowly
In line with death's birth
For the many I did bleed
Never to be reverent for my deed
Such an empty sacrifice of vanity...

Possibilities  extend well beyond reason
Even magic cries out treason
The knowing knew yet could not prove
The feeling felt beyond itself
The dreamer dreamt in waking hours
Was not the heart the true source of power?
A conjured thought manifest
Such is god and nothing less...

And so starts
The day over
Never stay clean
Never stay sober

This is the death
Of all those cares
Subconsciously
Remain unaware

The bottle has been
An old best friend
A handful of pills
And numbness sets in

Just like no love
Just like no friends
And so starts
The day
Over again
...

And when they broke me
My heart never healed
My trust in society
Is what they killed
Life so easily wasted
By the lies
Of thugs and thieves
Another soul forsaken
   By your local Saint Police...

If I could only explain
What it is I feel
When the darkness consumes
My body and will
Tides of longing
Crash my shore
Haunting echos
Of love lost wars
Deeply ingrained
The shadows of time
I carry them with me
In riddles and rhymes
Letting them out
So I can breathe
Oh what stains
One life can leave
....

Try and wrap
Your mind around
A paradox
Quite grotesque
Existing within
A parallel
While bypassing
Togetherness

An ideology
Of choseness
To survive
The end of days
Will hold us
In its clutches
And suspend us
In its maze
...

There exist a reason
I have to believe
Things are how
They're supposed to be
Pain and pleasure
Heaven and Hell
Doing just fine
But not that well
.....
Ups and downs
Backs and forth
Comings and goings
Returning
To Source
....
The trip of a lifetime
In an endless sea
Yes I do believe there's a reason
For you and for me!

I’ve no need
To Rebel
Who is god
I can’t tell
The creator
Of time
The drawer
Of lines
The giver
The taker
Of hell?
A bit
Too much
For my soul
   To tell....

There remains no absolutes
In this object subjective world  
Except by dissolution
An occasional loophole
Into those "perhaps" conclusions

As the ceiling rises
On the new world poet's pen
Let our sight be open
To an existences
That hold no ends

But let us not
Carry it to far
With a mind set
Of brimstone and hell fire!

We're Trapped
In this physical
Realm of existence
That's logically perceived

No cognitive conclusion
Nor magical delusion
Could ever break us free

So relax
Chances are
We're  just drifting
In eternal universes
On an endless sea
...
...

Although right now
It seems quite calm
These waves of peace
Out on our lawns
Truth is, the violence
Defines our hearts
One thing in common
We share that mark
That fable of entitlement
He smote his brother
And off we went
....

To cast away them old anxieties
I stringently hold my course
Turning away from mystic deities
I only focus on the source

The spirit forms to fit
A reality that refuses to bend
And questions of our existence
Are blown by perpetual winds

Who can really say beyond a doubt
If we’re temporal or we’re permanent
No scientific experiment
Could ever positively determine it

And as we strive to understand
Just why the hell we’re here
We’re distracted by the cosmos
And the music of the spheres

The smallest part of existence
The atom
Is made up of subatomic particles
These particles
When observed, they seem to be moving
In an orderly fashion
Yet when humans try to measure
These particles
The pattern of their movement
Goes sporadic
Popping in and out of
The quantum barrier
An unknown dimension
A place immeasurable
By any scientific instrument

The act of the human mind intervening
Is the only variable
That explains this phenomenon

Everything that exists beyond
Creation/chance
Started from a thought
The imagination
And then was manifest into reality
i.e., cars, computers etc.

So if enough people intervene/pray for something
To come to pass
It more than likely will...

If I could be
Simply myself
For just a moment
Or two....
Nothing fancy
Just what you can't see
Expose my ignorance to you

All my secrets open and known
Like...
God how I love to always stay ******!
All my laundry, there on the floor
    ***** dishes, no room for more......

Oh and sometimes I lie!
For insistence...
Nothing I wrote above
Is allowed in my life
I am obsessed with being clean
***** dishes? Laundry
I have two different machines

But I do love to smoke buds
After all, truth is
Writing ******
Is my love!!!

With a blank look in her eyes
She exist in our relationship
She moves without mind
As I bail out her sinking ship

A break from her stare
To ***** about cash
We have more than we need
Not counting her stash

Without a word
Without a plan
She dumps her cares
Where ever they land

With both our burdens
Upon my back
She's off to play
And that is that

So now you ask
What will I do
Afraid of change
I'll stay a fool...

This is that part of me
I’m not afraid to expose
A glimpse of my nakedness
A composition I compose

Freely I share regrettable mistakes
Lapse in judgment, errors in good taste
Just as you identify then quickly deny
These are such feelings you’d rather hide...

Creativity comes in darkness
As well as in light
Fear not the lack of morals
As the Poets take to flight...

Part of me's
Been broken
Most of me
Still runs

I would give you
Heart and soul
To be your only one

No, you need not be lonely
On this desert road alone
Ask me what's for dinner
And I will take you home
....

Someone's been listening
Gathering our prints
Every single cyber glimpse

I turned to face her, her eyes ruled my guts
I tried to embrace her, self-mutilated in her cuts
I wiped the wicked from her gloom
There pink elephants consumed her room
I pretended not to notice her self-destructive maze
So many precious moment I was locked away

I'm here if you need someone to bleed upon
That's all I really have to offer since I've been gone
Gone like your trust in love, gone like your heart
Gone like your need for a father but where would I start....

Somewhere deep within
The chambers of forgotten love
She still lingers
Periodically subconsciously
She breaks free
She visits me in peaceful slumber
Unannounced and antiquated
To any short term
Thought or event of my daily resolve
She is a reminder of bad choices
Of a naive hungry heart...
Although no longer do I bleed
My mind opens wider realizing
She shall always be a part
Of who I am

I don’t mean to shut lovers out
But
A forcefield of uncertainty surrounds me
As I expand with the expanding universe

As a force of creative energy
Forged and tempered in spirit fire
Bridged in eternal continuity
A Traveler must travel alone

There’s no place like home......
There’s no place like home.......
There’s no home...

There remains no train to glory
The jackals have broken their cells
The zombies are in the mall now
The angels are cast unto hell

The brilliance of the wicked
Rule the castle of thieves
All the wars they can monger
All the innocent blood they can bleed

Corporate incentives form their new gods
The big money of freedom's speech
They locked the gates to the heavens
       And ignore the voice of the meek...

A Vampire's Journal

So calm the city night
That quickens
The heart of stone
An awakening
Of immoral desires
The day will not condone

These neon nights
Never seem to dull
A thirst for excitement
At an endless beggar's ball

The power of magic
The star-struck eyes
The crystal moon
So high in the sky

The illustrious fashions
Of the filthy rich
The seductive lure
Which drives my itch

Such smells and sights
Has only the night
As I turn to the shadows
And take to flight

Here I am sacred
Here I am whole
The night sets the stage
For my favorite role ...

Velvety roses so pleasing to the senses
Convey such messages as apologies and love
The aroma of angels in blue blurry skies
When the spirit of giving comes from above

To brighten your new day
With magic and laughter
A spectrum of colors
So brilliantly captured

A life refreshed
Each moment begins
The happiness of new days
Is the energy I send...

And in the rapture
Of those forgotten
The stars shall spark
A final bargain

Within the eye
An eternal light
Beyond the realm
Of wrong versus right

To exist forever
Shall drive our will
Beyond the knowing
Of the subjectively real..

Positively
I want to be me
I possess a loving heart
And gifted eyes to see

And somewhere between
The physical and unseen
There exist an over whelming
Need to be free
To love beyond the seas
Sometimes I wonder
Am I on my own team?

Although it's saddening
To feel self suffering
The suffering in our world
Makes my empathy bleeds

And yet
I have hope
And send it
Upon the breeze.....

I realize this may sound
Well. Somewhat unnatural

Can you at least
Allow me to watch you
Watching

How soon love
Gets forgotten
Okay
Then Shall I bid you
Good night my love
!

I would love you
True and free
I would love you
In spite of me
I would love you
In that blouse
I would love you
Way down south
I would love you
And do whatever you say
I would love you
But I'd rather just get laid!

The vortex of the cloud dragon
has swallowed up the sun
His heart burns with fire and rage
his tail is shiny spun...

Fortunately
My dreams cling
to silver linings
No Dragon can keep
my love from shining!

Life is either worth living
or you plainly wish to die
Poetry is a magic carpet
And so our spirits fly!
...

I have this recurring dream
Of the greatest love I’ve ever known
I must have spent a lifetime
Never ever letting go

I made so many mistakes
But losing you was the worst
No other god-sent angel
Could ever lift this curse

The void that you left
Was my world come undone
You were the center of my universe
My bright and early sun

Unfortunately jealousy ruled
My very existence
My naivete never failed
My foolishness persisted

It was my way of keeping
My immature heart safe
I felt no need to grow up
And that sealed my fate

And you, you’re just a dream
I wish would never end
I’d give up all I have
To be with you again

Let me catch up
With your suffering heart
Tormented by love's fatigue
The brokenhearted wows me
Your longings that can never be

I too have a shadow following
The darkness of soul that begs for light
Spent my adult life in a literal prison
Lost my children, my world, my life

Still my voice is the liberal in the room
And no matter how ****** up my life "was"
I love who I am
And I'm happy
   So hang in there...

That one cold day
You were gone
Oh how I longed
To be wrong
Believing
That you could
Never return
Owning
All those bridges
Burned

If like you
I could
Walk away
Save my love
For another day
In the silence
Of forgetfulness
Sudden darkness
Flip a switch
No dread lingering
No emo unrest
Just rap it up
I've done my best

Then I would be
Broken too
Breaking all
The golden rules
...

Black hole hourglass
Time ******* through
How do you deal with
Entropy as a muse?

With restless soul
I travel these roads
I long for a heart
Of solid gold

You got to be going somewhere to get lost
And so I'm only out here gathering moss
I sleep away in nocturnal gloom
When the darkness hides the hopeful moon

When the daylight comes
I'll break camp and go
Beyond the next ridge
Where nobody knows...

Raw passion so intense it intoxicates
Captured in a moment of no escape
Two lovers erupt in heated naked bliss
One spark from her eyes and the fuse is lit

Brush of skin and an electric charge ignites
******* *****, chill bumps take flight
The scent of pheromone impairs the senses
The fulfillment of desires, the unspoken consensus

Take in deep, that driving heat
Perspiration flows, dampened sheets
Saturated in lust and no regrets
Life is awesome I must confess...