Who is worthy?
How do I know?
I see so many others
That I know deserve
Only the best.
So why do I not.
Why do I see myself
As something less?
Am I wrong?
Am I bad?
Did I sin unforgivably?
Is there even such a thing
As unforgivable?
I forgive all,
Except for myself.
What different trait
Do I possess?
Is it just inevitability
That we all hate ourselves?
How do I learn
To let my wrongs go?
To accept the past
And be okay
With having a future?  
I say it's time,
Time to love.
Self-love.
Unconditional.

When every thought makes you cringe
then you will understand
When every rock is a body
then you will understand
When every hand is a nightmare
then you will understand
When every touch makes you cower
then will you understand
Do not dare tell me we are the same
*until you truly understand

life will get better
then worse
then better again
because life is not about
consistency
it will change
it will hurt
but it will be beautiful
and broken
and incredible
and horrible
and *worth it

There are empty pages that yearn for ink describing her loving caress.
There are empty beds that beg for the arch of her lower back.
I know which one I would rather fill.

I keep my paintbrush with me
Wherever I may go
In case I need to cover up
So the real me doesn’t show.
I’m so afraid to show you me
Afraid of what you’ll do-
That you might laugh or say mean things;
I’m afraid I might lose you.

But if you be patient and close your eyes
I’ll strip off my paint coats real slow.
Please understand how much it hurts
To let the real me show.
Now my coats are all stripped off-
I feel naked, bare, and cold.
But if you still love me with all that you see
You are my friend, pure as gold.

I need to keep my paintbrush, though,
And hold it in my hand.
I need to keep it handy
In case someone doesn’t understand.
So please protect me, my dear friend,
And thanks for loving me true.
But, please, let me keep my paintbrush with me
Until I love me too.

For all the plants that never get the chance to dance in the wind
For the wilted who spill, drinking away their built up sin
To those who choose not to speak in order to avoid disaster again
I dare you, to put down your sword, and pick up a pen

Defenses guarding false pretenses anchored by apprehension
Left my soul suspended in the smog of a ***** dimension
Purging through pores and unlocking my mind's doors
Left me to believe in things I could not accept before.
Eye put on a pair of wings to elevate and see what was really in store

I chose limitless bliss and unending warmth

No longer was life a chore,
implored by something more
lured by an unseen force

and with all three eyes I now adore

..Knowing I am a fractal
could-be casualty
swallowing humanity's vain reality
drowning out the worst in me
cutting all my puppet strings
from the cloud that had power to make me bleed

noticing symphonic synchronicites
I jumped in the river and floated downstream

inhaling sweet oxygen no longer dying to breathe
For when we try to release, we see peace as it comes naturally
we've been searching for tranquility when it exists in you n me.
the modified god with unlimited ability
Yet even the highest high can go blind when we lose the will to dream

I can't be there for each road as it bends
But I know as of late, can't say I've been a good friend.
So with every ounce of love I can extend
I'll meet you down the river, at what seems to be the percieved end.

You will meet an eagle eager to offer you a feather,
dip it in ink.
Write out every single pattern of you weather,
and let it take you to the brink.
The frequencies within and around will astound as you use shears on your own tether,
Faster than you can unconsciously blink.
At last you can relax knowing it gets better forever,
For together we won the right to think.