You can't talk about long distance relationships until
the only way you can hear his voice, is through the voice mail he made
6 months ago

You can't talk about long distance relationships until
you can no longer feel his arms around you

You can't talk about long distance relationships until
you forget the colour of his eyes
and the shape of his jaw

You can't talk about long distance relationships until
the faded memory of his laugh breaks your heart
because you can no longer hear it

You can't talk about long distance relationships until
you say I love you to him
and his grave says nothing back

You can't talk about long distance relationships until
you're in love with a boy
*six feet under

For someone who is never leaving,
I say goodbye a lot
For someone who is never gonna stop loving you,
I deny my love a lot
For someone who needs you like a newborn needs to be fed
I push you away a lot.

For someone who counts every second from the moment i hear your footsteps fade
Till i see you again,
I pretend to be oblivious a lot.

For someone who is burning at the sight of you two together,
I wish you well a lot.
For someone who cries every night,
I still have a lot of hurt inside
For someone who is never going to be first on your list,
I expect a lot.

For someone who remains awake at night reminiscing the little details about you
I avoid any sort of eye contact with you a lot.

I always wonder how life would be different
if I had said all those unspoken thoughts
locked up inside my head

You're not the one
I'm sorry to say
You've been there
You love me
But it's not the same

You're not the one
He's out there
Somewhere waiting for me
Just to find him
That's the problem

You're not the one
I want you to be
But I can't make the impossible
A reality
So is life

You're not the one
I'm sorry darling
I love you
Hold me close
While you still can

You're not the one
But we can pretend
Just for a little while
I'll give myself to you
I know you'll take me

Even though you're not the one

I was addicted to you;
you were allergic to me.

She tried to block
everyone out.
She told herself she wouldn't
allow anyone to hurt her any more.

She lied.

She knew, deep down, that the walls
she prided herself on - the ones she
claimed she topped with barbed wire
and electricity, were really just small
white picket fences with far too many hinges.

She knew that there was a
“Welcome” mat sitting at the door
to her heart that had been caked
with the dirt from the previous men
who had walked all over her.

Yet it still lay there, cheery and
hopeful as ever, that one day
someone would walk in and
make themselves at home-
maybe someday someone wouldn't
end up walking right back out.

She was naive- blind sided by her
own dreams that one day things
would be different;
that one day she wouldn't have
to hurt any more. She dreamt that
she would finally meet someone
who wasn't like everyone else.

Someone who would stay.

Her dreams would never come true;
but no one had the heart to warn her
of that-
even if they had she would have
disagreed, even though
subconsciously
she would have known she was
the one who was wrong.

Her heart may have been weak but
her will was weaker.

She never had the strength to
protect herself; or to build better
walls; or to burn the welcome mat;
or to lock the door.

She’ll never know
how not to let people in.

So instead he greets the
with a smile and dives in
heart first, granting everyone
a chance to get inside
and destroy her, every time.

She’ll never learn…