They call it "chemistry"
But it feels like much more to me

Everything else ceases to exist
So nothing but Us is relevant

Our souls found a secret place
A quiet piece of the universe's space

Somewhere to breathe and intertwine
Your energy dancing with mine

A place where people rarely meet
Yet we found ourselves so naturally

And maybe it's insanity
But you feel like magic to me

Head heavy
Chest empty
Brain swimming endlessly
Stomach churning
Throat burning
This broken heart is destiny
Spiraled thoughts
My mind is taut
The OCD attacks fully
These stupid lies
Waste so much time
As if you'd ever think of me

Emptiness rings heavy in my chest
Echoing demands are overwhelming
I thought I figured this out already
Settled the storm that rages inside me
I guess it's just one of those things
A problem without a clear ending
A lifelong battle I have with myself
Winning or losing, it's all the same thing

This dark hole is a part of my soul
Not just a stain that washes away
The Void lives and breathes and beckons
It's more than a place that I can escape
I've ran and fought and conceded
Fed it everything it's craved
Nothing could ever be enough for it
It's made of more than empty space

Constucted from trauma and pain
By social lies of what happiness means
It's deeply fueled by insecurity
The Void is built on broken dreams
It won't ever let me feel whole again
So it says I'm just a broken thing
Even though I know that it's lying
I'm still tempted to give it everything

Hope can be a beautiful thing
But when people show you who they are
It loses it's relevance
Trust the acid burning your stomach
From crying over hurt feelings
Not the good you see in her
Trust the tangled knots
Weighing down your thoughts
Not the "potential" painting your perspective
Trust the emptiness of wasted time
And the regrets you carry
Not the chance she'll show up this time
There's only so many opportunities
You can hope for something different
Before you're the one breaking your own heart

Love yourself enough
To know your worth.
Love yourself enough
To let it go.

May I remove these hooks from my heart
Dislodge ice-hot metal from burning flesh

May the air rush through these wounds
A fresh breath, painful and promising

May I feel the emptiness in freefall
As the universe guides me into the unknown

May these holes built of loss and longing
Transform into refuge for peace and calm

I know that a life in chains isn't living
As I know letting go requires faith

May I find the courage to break away from painful familiarity
And to fall into the terrifying freedom of oblivion

I am transfixed
Held in place by chains of anxiety
I have gouged their hooks deep into my chest
As if their restraint could keep me safe
Believing the lies that they whisper
That beauty can still grow in a life without risk
But healing has taught me well
Not to trust sermons built from trauma
I can see this trap I've built myself into
And I ask the Universe to guide me through it

I've spent so long
Chasing after butterflies
Following the flutters
And rarely touching the ground
Mistaking the excitement of new
For the deepness of love
I've come and gone so many times
Feeling waves of lust wash over me
Partially "in" at any moment
With one foot always ready to step out
Letting the past drip away
As new feelings flood back in
In this new life I notice glimmers
The sparks of energy from before
Sunshine glinting off the water
The breeze echoing off butterfly wings
What once consumed me entirely
Now barely asks for pause

When I met you, the entire world stopped
When we kissed, the earth shifted beneath us
I fell in love with your soul as it danced with mine
That first day and every one after.

You are not the flutters, you are the life propelling them
You are not waves, but the moon commanding the sea
You are you and I am me and somehow
The Universe brought us together
I love you more than I've ever known
And I want to give you everything
My soul knows yours so intricately
And I'll love you for all of eternity