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I hate waiting,
but I'm the one who's always late.

I hate talking to people,
yet I often have the most to say.

I hate being ignored,
but want others to go away.

I hate feeling neglected,
though I forget those around me by letting my thoughts lead me astray...

I hate clingy people,
yet I find myself obsessing over you everyday.

I hate it when others try to get close to me, however, I continue to dream of having the chance to be close to you;
wishing that you'd stay...
2:30am thoughts...
  Mar 2016 Misty Meadows
GaryFairy
I have tried too many times
reaching out my hand with no kind returns
pulling back my hand to find
just broken fingers, scars, and burns
Misty Meadows Mar 2016
If you are aiming for my
Attention, then your
Attempts are inconspicuous.
I mean like, nonetheless
So frivolous.
Can't function without a
Bitterness?

A bitterness towards me.
Something I have nothing to
Do with.
So very blunt and so
Rude, coming off as just ruthless.
When the truth is,
You are irrelevant and so foolish.

But it's just fine with me.
Females hold this hurt for
Long.
Can never fathom
The new notes for new songs

That aren't about them, or her,
Or her either.
One to fiddle with love--
Break strings of desire.
All smoke and no
Fire,

It is very okay to cry.
Can't look in my eyes.
Am I that bad, despite
The times you loved my
Lies.
Offered love. Could willingly
Spread your thighs.
But with no surprise,

I disappear, but it's never so
Abrupt.
You push my luck, and suddenly,
I give up, but in no
Rush.

So blunt with no shame.
I honestly must say,

Females swear they hate
Games,
But be begging to get
Played.
  Mar 2016 Misty Meadows
Miranda Renea
I grew up in suburbia-
With picket fences as white as the faces
Who say they're godly enough to save babies
(As long as they're not queer)
Because we don't have to live with the fear
Of corpses lining the sidewalks
Of our perfectly landscaped yards
We have no guards firing on peaceful protestors
Because our children are filed into orderly lines
Laid out for them at birth
But for what it's worth, we teach them of racism
From a white textbook that lies about founding fathers
Where segregation is just a word and
Oppression is hardly even mentioned.
Our children, who play at the age of 6
And lose their innocence at the age of 16
Suburbia is a life of it's own,
Gangly arms and legs
Like the teenagers who starve themselves
And steal their parents liquor
Just to get drunk quicker
Ignorant of those on the streets dying of hunger
No wonder I yearn to be far from this hell I call home.

Allen Ginsberg once said
“America I’ve given you all and now I am nothing”
The Wonder Years once said
“Suburbia I’ve given you all and now I am nothing”
But I’ve found fallacies in both of these,
I feel it’s more like
Suburbia I’ve given you all
And now I’m an awkward 20 year old
Who doesn’t know how to talk to black people
Suburbia I’ve given you all
And now I’m way too confident walking around the city at night
Because I forget there are communities
Where people actually have to lock their doors,
Suburbia I’ve given you all
And now I have a 16 year old brother
Who thinks the word *** and **** jokes are funny
Suburbia I've given you all
And now my father hates that I'm for gender equality
Well dear daddy,
I hope this offends you.

Because I am offended
By a community that tells **** victims they were asking for it
I am offended by a community
That tells my best friend Liam
That he's just confused, that
His love for Adam is an abomination
I am offended by a community
That offers equality as thinly veiled oppression,
With houses decorated in the decadence of degradation,
All the while their perfect sons and daughters
Are dying of depression because
The hilt of a gun is so much quicker
Than the drugs of their addiction

Suburbia, you are the seed of suicide
Feeding off of your violent silence,
Your white fences slice our tongues
And leave us mindless.
Suburbia, you have betrayed us.
Taught us ignorance is bliss with
Algebra instead of how to do taxes,
Spent more time worried about
Girls' shoulders instead of *** education,
Taught me not to speak unless
My hand was raised as if praise
Is given to authority without question,
Funny how they forgot to mention
Our country was founded on rebellion.

But suburbia, I forgive you
And so I humbly ask of you,
Find the keys of compassion within the heart and
Shed the lock of ignorance that grips your mind
The door may be rusted but it can open with time
Suburbia, I beg of you
Join us in the war of love
Let us all raise our fists and
Paint peace signs on our wrists,
We are disobedient dandelions swaying in the sun,
Words of kindness rolling off our tongues
Like pacifistic shots of a gun
Firing respect instead of rounds
And burying hate instead of bodies in the ground.
***This is a group piece. The lovely Mary Hamula is the other writer that worked on it with me.
I've found far more solace in a German Chocolate Cake than any religion
I can think of to date ....
Copyright March 7 , 2016 by Randolph L Wilson * All Rights Reserved
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