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507 · Jun 2018
I Hate Dreaming
M-PAC Jun 2018
Do we belong together?
I don’t know.
As the days go on,
I can’t seem-
to let you go.
I think about you all the time,
Do you ever think of me?
I’ll sometimes forget you in reality-
Only to wind up finding you
In my Dreams.
189 · Nov 2018
Everything
M-PAC Nov 2018
Everything was better
whenever,
we kept in contact.
Now I write the message
and I don’t receive one back.
Tell me babygirl,
what kind of **** is that?
When you were down and
out,
Drowning
Whose the one who pulled you back?
We done
went through some tough ****,
I truly thought we would last.
But I lied to myself,
Convinced that it would help,
Now I’m trapped in this room
And there’s nobody else.
Smoking on the ****,
Drinking on the lean,
Italicized
I’m bold but I’m so lonely.
******* random *******
But I still don’t feel a thing.
****** healing,
No Marvin Gaye,
We were on the same path
then you went astray,
Like the blunt that I’m smoking
thrown into
the ashtray,
Like the smoke exhaled.
You faded away.
I never thought I’d see they day
when you up and left,
Everything was better
whenever,
we kept in contact.
One or Two?
1.“****** Healing/ No Marvin Gaye”
2. “****** Healing/
Why Marvin lie to me?”
126 · Nov 2018
My Wish
M-PAC Nov 2018
On top of the world
I ain’t coming down,
Looking through heavens eyes
Earths turned **** bound,
Don’t worry close your eyes
It’s all good now,
I’m here with you.


Round and round we go,
Dancin’ with Demons,
Dancin’ with Devils,
Don’t worry bout me
I already know,
This is for you.
106 · Oct 2018
Games
M-PAC Oct 2018
I’ve been wanting you baby
Why you playing games?
Why you playing games?
Why you playing games?
I’ve been wanting you baby
Why you playing games?
Why you playing games?
Why you playing games?
I need you ta
make up your mind
We don’t have enough of time
Before I die
All I know is that
I gotta make you mine
I’ve been wanting you baby
Why you playing games?
Why you playing games?
Why you playing games?
102 · Apr 2018
Last Promise
M-PAC Apr 2018
I let my guard down,
Man **** these feelings.
Put the blame on myself,
I tried so hard to believe it.
Now I’m back where I started,
How I hate it here,
I’ve been down for so long,
****** man,
This my year.

My Last Promise.
81 · May 2018
The Book of Life
M-PAC May 2018
Death doesn’t scare me anymore as much as rejection does,
To be denied by someone who already knows me,
Who I once was?
Would terrify my soul,
Cause I wouldn’t have control;
Who wants to die,
To wake up and be told they aren’t loved anymore?
No matter the struggle. There will always be better days.
63 · Aug 2018
What Am I Here For?
M-PAC Aug 2018
I’m down for the count
I’m falling faster than ever,
They said don’t worry to much
In due time
It always gets better,
I keep my head to the sky
One day I’ll know,
I’m asking you now
Whaattt,
am I here for?

What am I here for?
What am I here for?

I’m asking you now

Whaattt,
am I here for?
61 · Jul 2018
A minute is a long time
M-PAC Jul 2018
It’s been a minute...
Since I’ve seen you’re face,
I can’t hold back any longer.
The more you move away,
The more I become stronger.
Nothing like Hancock,
No hand on my ****.
This feeling is so real,
A love so new
Would stop a clock.
I don’t wanna be ****** and push you away.
I’ve noticed whenever your absent from my life
My days turn into gray.
I can’t depend on you
To provide happiness,
It’s all on myself.
The more I think of you,
The more I scream out for help.
It’s been a minute since I’ve seen your face
And now you’re with someone else.
59 · Jul 2018
Perfecting The Craft
M-PAC Jul 2018
If you love me
Then let’s take it slow.
Lord only knows,
how much time we have left,
Promise-
you won’t let me go.
It’s along road ahead of us,
Let’s take it slow
and enjoy this moment.
Lord,
only knows,
I can’t wait until it’s over.
#Dedication #Resilience #Hope #TimeIsOfTheEssence
56 · Mar 2018
Days
M-PAC Mar 2018
There are days full of wondering.
There are days where I’m pretending.
There are days where I don’t know where to go.
There are days where I feel I’m dying slow.
There are days,
Where the pain doesn’t even exist.
There are days that I forget you live.
Then, there are days your memory digs a hole. Deep into my mind to make itself at home. Echoes of your voice play throughout my head, along with your scent, the memories, and holding you close in the bed.

Trust me I’m fine.

I’ve been fine since you left.
Took a journey of my own
found light and even found death.
How I miss you dear friend, miss you more than ever. Wishing we could communicate so we could tell everything to each other.
You left me?
You can’t just come back. If it was you all alone then I’d understand that.
But you chose them...
over me?
You thought you knew what burned meant?
The flame you left me with was another degree.
It took some time,
I had to find myself.
I’ve waited patiently.
Writing came into play,
Now I’m just a man
planting magic seeds.

To be or not to be? That is the real question.

As I wonder; I look for hope.
As I pretend; I look for meaning.
When I don’t know where to go; I remember, no one does.
Life finds you.
When I feel I’m dying slow; I’m actually living.
When the pain is absent; it’ll usually come back that night.
Days that I forget you live; let’s me know this ain’t right.
Maybe in due time.
Nothing I can do to fight.
So don’t ask me if I’m okay.

Trust me,
Baby I’m fine.
I’m fine.
Trust me baby I’m fine.
Just trust me when I say it,
Baby I’m fine.
47 · Oct 2018
M-PAC
M-PAC Oct 2018
“Thou shall erase my name but thou shall NOT erase me from HISTORY”
45 · Jul 2018
Drunk Thoughts
M-PAC Jul 2018
Sipping drank
Thinking about you
Sipping drank
Thinking about you

Call your phone-
Nobody’s home,
I know you hate being alone.

I keep pursuing you
Even though you don’t need me.
Give it a couple hours,
And then
You’ll wanna see me.

Sipping drank
Thinking about you
Sipping drank
Thinking about you
22 · Nov 2018
What You Mean To Me
M-PAC Nov 2018
You don’t know what you mean to me
Something like water to a dying tree
Something like a doctor to a broken knee
Something like Beyoncé to Jay Z
Aye
I ain’t even tryna compare but
I gotta get this off my chest
Let’s discuss
What you and
I can be
All it takes is trust

(Trust)

Me promise I’ll get you through it

(Through it)

You know I love it
whenever
we get intimate
(Intimate)

I wish that I could tell you
what’s on my mind
(Mind)

I’ll never force the issue
I’ll leave it all to time
You’ll never know what you mean
Inside I’m dying (hmmm)

— The End —