The leaves are starting to fall
so am I
with the blossoming of dying trees
I am starting to die.

Someday, I’ll look up at you and try my hardest to not lose myself in your eyes. I will tell you what your favorite book is, how your favorite line goes and why you feel so sad and alone at night. I will be your superhero and we could run away somewhere far away like you always wanted to. I would tell you everything you don’t like about yourself and I would give you every reason why I love them. You would shake your head and deny it but I would kiss you instantly and you would be taken by surprise and in that moment of confusion, I’ll tell you everything I denied myself for so long and I would tell you about your laugh, how it kept me going, I will tell you how that sleepless night with you, made me feel at home and I would hold your hand and tell you how happy I am to have you in my life, How lonely you and amazing you made me feel,  I would tell you how you had me from the start and you will look me in the eyes before looking away and I will lift your chin up and tell you that I love you more than I've ever loved a soul  and you will be lost for words and  you will utter my name but I won’t listen. I will kiss you, for once not be a coward, tell you how you deserve better than everything going on and how you have made me realize, you’re everything I need and Someday, I will tell you how I wish you loved me more than anything.

Someday far from now I will look at the stars
I will think of my past
And somewhere along those memories
You will cross my mind
I will laugh remembering how you gave me butterflies
And I just hope wherever life takes you it is beautiful
Where you will learn to love life for more than something broken
I will hope all your pain has subsided
And someday you might look at the stars in some beautiful place
Thinking of all your memories
And I hope the girl who wrote poems crosses your mind.

It was a safe zone
standing so far
looking over
staying away from
when it seemed it was just
an attractive face
who seemed so
egotistical
opinionated
and arrogant
someone who was cold
and would never understand me
respect me
love me
and it was much easier
thinking you were this awful person
than finding out you weren't.

I hate how you can get up
Leave so easily
Act as if it doesn't hurt you
As if you feel nothing
And me I am foolish here,
Talking about you at 4 a.m.
To someone who could never even grasp the things,
The love that i feel for you and how could they,
They have not kissed your lips
Or felt your touch
They have not heard the laughter that escapes  
And I can’t help but want to hate you,
It would be so much easier to hate you
But my heart, it calls for you no matter how much,
How many times I try to move on,
You are no longer here
You shut me off
Letting me know I was no longer welcomed in your heart
but that I am implanted there in the seams of your heart
And your thoughts they scare you,
After all that’s what you told me.

You don’t notice my words
The feelings or truth in them
You don’t appreciate the time
To write and capture
You don’t read
You don’t see how it hurts
Feels
Crushes my insides
You don’t know
How much my words mean
You don’t give it the time of day it deserves
And when you notice,
It'll  be too late.

Honestly I didn't know how
so many things could fit inside of me,
how so much sadness could be in my heart
how much rage and frustration could welt my soul
but I knew that they were wrong
and that not many could ever understand.

I talk about you,
I let balloons go
I write to you
I send letters into space,
I speak to the sky
Knowing you'll get it.

It's a Sunday morning.
I   am sitting by the window with the sun on my face and a good book in my hand. You're across the room in bed, about to wake up to a cup of coffee.
All the sadness is gone,
We are happy.

I still haven't forgotten how close we were to the edge,
We could have taken one step
and almost found each other curled up beside one another in the morning. What you're thinking is right, "almost".
There will be a day when I forget because "almost"
is too small of a word for me to hold on to.

You're like the ocean, I can never get tired of looking in your direction
and I've never seen brown eyes look so blue.
No matter how rough the waves got,
The noise the water made when hitting the surface
never bothered me,
I can only smile at how beautiful it was when the sun hit the shore.

-It’s sunsets with you, Maybe on the beach
-A playlist made specifically for watching the moon with you
-Patience
-Intoxicating nights of just nothing but our sheets
-Laughing on the couch while you play your music in the background
-Jealous remarks but knowing we belong to each other completely
-You singing (this will be my favorite I’m sure)
-Drunk and Morgan wallen
-Sarcastic use of my words that become your lingo too
-Words I wont be able to hold back
-It’s you playing guitar “somewhat okay” and me listening blissfully
-You and I on your bedroom floor
-5am and the sunrise from my window
-Eyes gazing into each other and not a single thing said
-A nervous first kiss
-Hands slightly grazing, Waiting for the other to hold on
-It’s you, anxiety filled but I still love you anyway
-It’s me, anxiety filled but you still love me anyway