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Oct 2015 · 384
Unspoken
Joseph Yzrael Oct 2015
7.13° N, 125.6° E


15:41

You were leaving.

I could have asked you
A thousand things
In the time we spent together.

I could have asked you
For the real reason
As to why you chose to spend
Those past few nights with me
In this nameless, blameless city.

I could have asked you
Who or what you were thinking of
In the times that you fell silent
And stared off into the distance.

I could have asked you
If you thought that
Coming here was a mistake
And that you'd rather be somewhere else,
Lost in the arms of someone else.

I could have asked you how I never
Heard you utter my name and yet
The taste of his name still lingered
On your lips and on your tongue
And down your throat.

I could have told you
A thousand things
In the time we spent together.

I could have told you
How I wanted everything,
And yet nothing, to change.

I could have told you
That the people we used to love
Didn't have to ruin the memories
Of things we cherished the most
Or the memories that we were
About to create.

I could have told you
About how leaving was such sweet misery
And yet it didn't have to mean
Saying goodbye.

About how I was still uncertain
About everything.
About you, about me.

About what this was
And where all of this
Was going.

But no.
I tried my hardest not to.
I was too busy drowning
In the things I wanted to ask
And the things I wanted you to say
That I forgot
That it wasn't going to matter
Soon enough.


16:02**

You were already gone
Before you even left.
We are made of sterner stuff than this.
May 2015 · 2.2k
Silent City
Joseph Yzrael May 2015
i’ve lost myself,
far from the rush
of the maddening crowd,
in a city that has fallen silent,
its vestige crumbling,
its past unspoken,
its reality slowly fading.

you are that city
awash with stories
i can no longer tell,
except perhaps in my mind,
in my thoughts,
where the aftertaste
of you still lingers.
Apr 2015 · 1.6k
Daylight
Joseph Yzrael Apr 2015
The air feels heavy in the daylight.
Morning noise falls through the cracks.
Like unwelcome guests.

I do nothing.
But breathe in. Inhale. Corrode
Heretic lungs weighed down by sighs.
Combust. Purify. In fumes of nicotine
And smoke of papal white. Aware
Each breath burning away at life.

Eyes that see no oversight.
Curtained in ******* light,
Fade out of view

The room is shun away
The world lies flourish
I have made an enemy
Out of the Day.
Apr 2015 · 1.5k
Desire
Joseph Yzrael Apr 2015
Tell me
where  
The City
breathes
its midnight
breaths

Where
all The
Sleepless

lay their
weary minds
to rest

Where
the Amber
Veil

has all but
flickered
and
faded

I will
follow
you
deep into
its Slumbering
Heart


And wade
through
the Thousand
Faces
that
keep us
apart
Apr 2015 · 728
Disquieted
Joseph Yzrael Apr 2015
Nightfall. Half-closed eyes
Shattering stars. Daylight cracks
In melancholy cups, in ambient air
Coffee slithers, lungs smolder

Hurricanes sing to raindrops
Rabid bottles, prancing shadows
Footsteps glide, sideways sways
Sobered by non-existent memories

The pale goddess smiles. Dreams
Behind scheming walls. We dance
In a place of vertical confusion
Future's past quickly slips away

Whispers. Bays of broken chords
Forgotten winds. Ruminations.
Transient scribbles, dusty tables;
On misty panes. Forgotten. Decay.
(An amalgam of several past poems.)
Apr 2015 · 2.1k
Terminal
Joseph Yzrael Apr 2015
This is how it ends
In an airport smoking lounge
Wasting life and breath
Oh delayed flights
Apr 2015 · 1.3k
I Do Not Write
Joseph Yzrael Apr 2015
I do not write about the joys of life
Or the calm and gentle quiet of nature.
There is too much faked joy in the world.

I do not write about love and loss.
I dare not tug at the fragile threads
That bind old wounds in rememberance.

I do not write about worldly truths
And the fallacies that we are often told.
I have forgotten them ― outgrown.

I do not write about my thoughts
For fear that I cannot find the words to fit
And that my mind will soon consume me.

I do not write ― I bleed.
Apr 2015 · 918
Transience
Joseph Yzrael Apr 2015
I have watched the ebb and flow of the Sea
Under the cold glow of distant Galaxies

I have tasted the rush of City lights
And all the Mornings that have come after

I have heard the Heavens move and balter
To the Music of the world underneath

I have seen the many Faces of the night
At the dawn and death of every Day

I have witnessed the Ground give way to life
And the Living given back to the ground

We are as the World that we move in
We are the Bones of the earth; Salt of the sea.

We are an eternity clothed in Transience
No Permanence is ours to hold and keep
Feb 2015 · 607
Spend the Night
Joseph Yzrael Feb 2015
Spend the night with me
In a city that has no name

And I will let your embers  
Singe my throat

As the street lights drown
In haze and smoke

Spend the night with me
In a place beyond gods and men

As we bare our souls
To the flaws of our hands

When the morning comes
We disremember and pretend
for those who are lost yet do not wander
Jan 2014 · 949
Morning After
Joseph Yzrael Jan 2014
Beneath the ceilings
Along scheming walls
The shadows and the light
Brisk tether and play
In a palace of vertical hell

Through space and time
Beyond words or rhyme
Tired eyes let boredom lie
Lungs choking, drowning
In things that were missing

The curtains dance
Against the pale
Gloom of the morning
Struggling to find sway
With the echoes of the wind

Caffiene and nicotine
Accompany the day
I wonder how many times
I've tried to push
And shove them away

Sober bottles scattered
On blameless floors
Bringing to light
The deeds of the night
In non-existent memories

I am asleep in daylight
To slumber I awake
Nov 2013 · 673
Before Slumber
Joseph Yzrael Nov 2013
look for me
in the incandescent
noise of the
rush hour crowd

hear me
in the scent
of whistling teapots
and unfinished books

find me
in unwritten words
and silenced thoughts

sink into my mind
and weigh down my
battered eyelids

sleep
visit me soon
for I fear
it may be
too late
Sep 2013 · 591
Embers
Joseph Yzrael Sep 2013
I lie beneath these crippled beams
Where light seeps through crags unseen
Dreary hues stand placid upon the pale
Drenched in amber that pierces gloom

The evening beckons my mind to wander
Far beyond the realm of the temporal
Where the echoes of emptied prayers
Forever keep their binding silence

I drink from the stars their wisdom
In trickling embers that singe my lungs
Euphoria burns away my every breath
As my smile hangs around like smoke

The night casts an ever different light
Where shadows fade and truths blur
The city drowns in the haze of dreams
As the dark creeps closer to the dawn

I wished for the darkness to persist,
For the transient realities to remain
But alas, nightfall has come and gone
Daybreak floods; the world moves on
Aug 2013 · 608
A Reason for Inebriation
Joseph Yzrael Aug 2013
Tomorrow morning never did exist
For us nothing but this night is real
We gather to quench this thirst
A toast, for all our troubles to steal

Denied, this world will not allow
My mind cracks under all the strain
This life is too much to live with now
With the next shot I’ll numb the pain

I know the pain will come back somehow
I'll hate myself more come break of day
But thoughts of dawn must be shoved down
As alcohol down my throat's way

Where sober efforts are in vain
My mind drifts slowly in intoxication's sea
In liquor's fog we become friends again
But that's barely enough for me

You're here but still I’m alone
At least my heart seems to forget
That your heart for me is stone
And that's all the love I'll get

If this illusion clouds your mind
And brings you into my embrace
When this night has been left behind
So would our memories, gone without a trace

If my actions fill me with regret
I won’t face them until day
The night is all I need and yet
Is it worth the price I have to pay?

It hinders all my despair
Pretending that you are mine
But I know this lie is not fair
Not now or any other time

Troubles remain forgotten
Time stands still once more
By day they'll hound me again
Even more virulent than before

I need release from my sorrow
But this solution is far too flawed
I cannot deny nor delay tomorrow
The falsehood cannot be ignored
Jan 2013 · 1.2k
Repeat
Joseph Yzrael Jan 2013
|| Watching daybreak
With half-closed eyes
As the sun shatters
Through night's cracks

Drinking cups
Of ambient air
As coffee slithers
Past parched lips

Listening to whispers
Of forgotten winds
To beating hearts
And engine throes

Humming to tunes
Of broken chords
Drowning woes
In music's bliss

Writing scribbles;
Transient notes
On dusty tables
And misty panes

Chasing pavements
Under peals of thunder
Dodging raindrops
And lightning strikes

Learning to dance
With hurricanes
And laughing with
The storm and surf

Relaxing at sundown
With bottles at reach
While shadows prance
In thick amber light

Walking beneath
A pale crescent moon
Feet gliding uneasily
On swaying sidewalk

Dreaming of dreams
And tangled delight
While the past's future
Slowly slips away ||
Jan 2013 · 1.2k
Insobriety
Joseph Yzrael Jan 2013
Drape my conscience
In threads of spirits
And let reality's smog
Occlude our dumb wits

Soulless eyes reflect
Deranged, dusty lights
Bottles close at hand
Flung far into the night

Sobriety quickly fades
Unveiling bitter truths
Of enamored facades
And follies of the youth

The stark sky spins rapid
Emotions spilled on blackened walls
All sense of reason departs
And wild fantasies come alive

Wavelengths intertwine
Smiles rife with desires
Eyes slowly close half-way
And all hindrance expires

Bodies tenderly woven
Lips on insanity's lip
Mindless and uncaring
Hands in lustful grip

After the tryst is done
Our memory shall depart
We cling on to bitter *****
And the embers of the heart

When the smoke clears
And garish reason descends
Guilt follows; paths diverge
No memory of us remains.
I haven't had a drink in quite some time.
Jan 2013 · 702
Thoughts
Joseph Yzrael Jan 2013
I wonder what it feels like
To be unwritten -- a thought
An idea striving to be inscribed
To be something that never was
And probably never will be.

I wonder about their fate.
Do they leave for another mind
Devoid of creativity or otherwise
Or stay there, eternally waiting
Locked-up in imagination limbo?

Are they just there, sitting
In the cold corners of my mind
Stuck midway between the sulci
Wilting into imagiary nothingness
Or struggling to become a reality?

What makes a thought complete?
Are they sewn up together in threads
Of liquor and crazed insobriety,
Patched up with deathless dreams
For the sake of being written?

I wonder what if feels like
To be written and yet incomplete
The half-thoughts on paper
Mixed up with other half-thoughts
In an indecipherable jumble

Maybe that's what I'm lacking
New beginnings, laughter, love,
Happy endings, there's a limit
To what experience allows me
To write or, to an extent, feign.

I speak for the voices left behind
The voices of long slewn ideas
Placed at the back of my mind
Ideas long crushed beneath
Countless writer's blocks

But they live on, they haunt me
In my waking, they still do
Like long forgotten feelings
And the fleeting personas
I never want to go back to.

After all, they were me,
These thoughts and ideas,
Or at least part of me,
For that one instance.
I wonder.
Thoughts are both beautiful and terrible things.
Jan 2012 · 895
Paragraphed
Joseph Yzrael Jan 2012
I am paragraphed.
Downed on dead nostalgia.
Daggers keep sway my song
Of buzzing doves and lions.
Fleets of sunken words
Tread on silent leaves.
Echoed sighs of empty pens
And woes of crumpled sheets.
Unblossom my emotions.
Let the infinite unbleed.
Words have failed me;
Paragraphed, I remain.
Made for my Literature class in 2011. Also published at Dagmay: Literary Journal of the Davao Writers Guild
(http://dagmay.kom.ph/2013/12/22/paragraphed/)
Jan 2012 · 1.3k
Musings
Joseph Yzrael Jan 2012
Dim-cast stars
Begin their vigil
Thunder strums
The lyres of myth

Puddles of dreams
Rinse dying skies
Iridescent crags
Breathe petrichor

Lightning arcs
Invading my dreams
Dusty feet stumble
Unto sinless floors

Love-burnt hands
In reckless abandon
Bloodied with ink
And papercuts

Words sewn to fit;
To tailor the soul
Coalesced by cords
Of liqueur and brew

Only to be abandoned
And forgotten.
Dec 2011 · 1.3k
Forty Winks
Joseph Yzrael Dec 2011
A tattered soul journeys.
Awaken the sleeping gods.
Jaded fragments of the whole.

Moonlight trickles down.
Smell of burning amber.
The night deflowered.

A fluorescent bolt.
The dismal void crackles.
Lightning brands the sky.

Supine on porcelain.
In a mesmer of cold.
Sensations surge.

Blankly whispering eyes.
Tracing the cracks.
A starless ceiling.

Music snakes about.
A dreary tangle.
Rhyme and melody.

Sober thoughts clamour.
Awash with miasma .
Sordid with memories.

Slivers of imagination.
Mares in the shadow.
My dire soul slumbers.

Emotions at the gallows.
Staircase spirit dialogues.
Coffee cup delusions.

Jaded fragments of the whole.
Awaken the sleeping gods.
A tattered soul journeys.
Dec 2011 · 1.1k
Distant Shores
Joseph Yzrael Dec 2011
I dreamed a dream of you
In countless grains of sand
Along forgotten shores
And distant memories

I watched the ocean
In its infinite mesmer
Under a blanket of stars
That never blinked

The storm clouds brewed
Rolled out like the truth
Cold lightning frolicked
And silent thunder rang

I watched the ocean again
As it crashed upon the coast
I knew even in my dreams
We stood on distant shores

The sun has long since set
The night, too, has died
Daybreak will come soon
Over cracked horizons
Dec 2011 · 910
The Road
Joseph Yzrael Dec 2011
Trees rustle with the passing wind
As starlight glints the moonless sky.
The trail I trek twists and meanders
To where morrow greets the dawn.

I stop amidst the noise and haste
To ponder my unsilenced thoughts.
Shall I continue along these roads
Or turn tail and come running back?

I know not where the path leads me
Or if my travels shall have an end.
The stars will be my guide tonight
As shadows follow suit my sole

The road before me stretches far,
Uncertainty lingering at every turn.
But though the past beckons me
I know in my heart I must move on.
Dec 2011 · 904
Sleep
Joseph Yzrael Dec 2011
Sleep visited me one night
Her body as cold as sleet
Light seeping from her being



Sleep visited me last night
Woke me, and fell upon me
Her life splayed over mine

Moon and starlight bled
Murdered by dawn's arousal
A discarded corpse of night


Death and dreams called out
In riddles and nightmares
Sleep was not the only one

Who died a death that night.
Aug 2011 · 698
Night Drops
Joseph Yzrael Aug 2011
Amidst the nightly dimness
Branded by vicious lights,

Minds rife with uncertainty
Perch behind strange eyes.

Foam and froth cushion doubts
Of shadows further down.

Tossing, turning, entwined;
Cries against the dreary drizzle.

Thoughts of daybreak vanish
Upon night's nimble prowl.

High above the goddess grins
Veiled by velvet and dust

As desire siphons, ****** and pins
The embers of livened skin.

Sheets of white glide underneath,
Illuminated by tainted radiance

****** on unfamiliar tracks,
Drowning in oceans uncharted,

Knowing less of the world.
Aug 2011 · 2.6k
Rainwater Prayers
Joseph Yzrael Aug 2011
Under the blanket of slanted waters, streaming down,
Behind the silver linings of the distant thunderclouds
The eternal sun lies suffocating, sheathed by the storm.

The rain smears the gray heavens. The world
Drowns behind the endless battery of the downpour.

Each trickle, each moment, quickly falling. Fading
Into the cesspool of dirt and debris. The pit
Of emotions and forgotten truths, washed away.

The leaves twist and turn at every droplet's touch
Crying out in soft thuds on the heavy roofs above.

Like the tin roofs and the sun and the heavens
And like the leaves and the dirt and debris
I gently whisper my pleas to the deluge:

*Rain.

Purge me.
Douse the embers
of false passion and ire.

Absolve me.
Cleanse this melancholy.
Ease these memories.

Purify me.
Rinse away the guilt.
Sink these doubts.

Restore me.
Clarify my vision.
Refine my thoughts.

Heal me.
Replenish my soul.
Bring about forgiveness.

Rain.
Revitalize my roots.
Soothe my mind.
Soak my bones.
Calm my spirit.

With your perennial blessings,
Bathe me in your sacred waters
So that peace
May finally find me.
Jul 2011 · 966
Along the Boulevard
Joseph Yzrael Jul 2011
Outside my unseeing windows
Stringed lamp posts
Pierce the deepest night.

Lights still dance
Along the streets,
Reflected in silent pools,
Splashed by gentle roars
Of pavement rubber
Racing the idled road.

Beneath my candid room
The aircon units gargle
Their cold nocturne
Of sleep and thought.

The sidewalk stays mindful --
Witness to murmured kegs
And murdered heels,
Its quiescence reverberates
The gentle parley
Of blaring merchant loons.

The boulevard refuses
To choke in darkness.

My mind will wait until
The clamour of morning
Shatters this weighted gloom.
Jul 2011 · 1.0k
Closing Time
Joseph Yzrael Jul 2011
Six minutes to closing time
No time left to find my rhyme
With no hours left to start again
I'll simply leave the hanging ends

Five minutes to closing time
No more room for caffeine and wine
I must make sense of my own lies
Before the metropolis finally dies

Four minutes to closing time
No less ease to forgive these crimes
All that I can do is write this sh*t
Hoping peace finds me not unfit

Three minutes to closing time
Treachery still on my mind
Companionship filled with doubt
It's done, time is running out

Two minutes to closing time
Lights begin to flicker in the lime
The traffic chases the stars halfway
And glass buildings melt away

One more minute to closing time
No time left to find my rhyme
I guess this is how it should end
With an apology, a poem and...
Jul 2011 · 801
First Sight
Joseph Yzrael Jul 2011
Time stops and the world dissolves
into a thin mist, condensing
to form a single point
where your mind meets halfway
with her heart while the earth
and the sky meld with the amber horizon
as the midnight stars descend
to glisten and burst into brilliant supernovae
in her eyes and yours while heartbeats race
to the rhythm of unwritten love songs
and mamihlapinatapai melodies
while thought and reason escape
and words fail inevitably
as both your heart and hers are lost
in a bittersweet tangle
of ghostly kisses and longing fingertips
adrift in a sea of heartstrings
and shifting bed sheets.
Jul 2011 · 1.9k
Espresso
Joseph Yzrael Jul 2011
Trembling fingers hold
This brimming cup.
Coffee staring blankly.
Mirrored silence.

Bitter taste invades.
My tongue, no longer
Tastes. Scent of bliss
Lingers in my veins.

I drink too soon, cup
Upends, its contents
Spilled in my lap. Reflected
My soul and my heart.
Also published at Dagmay: Literary Journal of the Davao Writers Guild
http://dagmay.kom.ph/2013/09/08/espresso-2/
Jul 2011 · 680
Before Reality Sets In
Joseph Yzrael Jul 2011
Hand me another,
          I say, 'Til my heart
                    Numbs and my mind
          Forgets all its reason.

                               Actions exaggerate.
                    Unfamiliar thoughts
                              Assail. Mists of haze
          Rouse my shaken courage.

           I'll speak my heart
                              Whilst truth still
                    Hangs, pulled above
          Clouds of disorient

                               Two are one and
                    One are two, My
                              Lips utter only
          Dead words, songs
                    Of broken chords

           Regret, nostalgia,
                    Emotions entwined
                              Grant me one memory,
                    Of how I can get home.

                               Muddy lights, dim
                    My eyes please
                              Swaying earth
                                        Lead the way back.
Jul 2011 · 607
No Words
Joseph Yzrael Jul 2011
As she walks away the clouds crumble and crash
through the blood-red horizon as flakes
of once-fiery passion drift slowly towards
the frozen pool of teardrops at your feet
while your smile fades into a ghostly trace
of loneliness and your body weakens at the joints
as every part of your soul aches while the cold
entanglement of sorrow grips your heart as
grief twists and torments your gutted insides and
nostalgia toys with your broken mind with the melody
of her voice playing over and over again like
a broken record that won't shut off and
you can't help but sit there and think about her
in the most painful ways that no words can ever express
or just lie in bed as you dream about the now-shattered
happiness you and her once shared so long ago
and you are reduced to a mere shell of your formal self,
locked in a desperate struggle of pretending
to live a normal life by trying to bury the hurt deep down
inside even though it gnaws at your chest and
breaks open old scars every time
the emptiness of your eyes meet hers.

— The End —