By the lonely river

I sat waiting for you.
Hoping that you would come back for me.
We would hold hands and talk about the future we never received.
Laugh about the endless memories that were never made.
But you were just like the long, cold river.
And I knew you would not stop for me.
So I sat aimlessly, alone

By the lonely river.



-FreeMind

Apologies my friend

It has been a while
I'm sure you thought
I had found a different style.

You are back in my arms again
I know you thought I was gone.
But time made sure love was slain.

Memories of her
Plaguing my mind
Have made my speech slur.

Forgive me and find your way,
Search deep and make your home
This time your edge is here to stay.

It will be our little secret path
This time no one will know
Of the internal wrath.

Make your mark for those to see
Let them know what is in me
Your pain will bring me such glee.

Forgive my time away
Never will I let you down
Because I no longer want to stay

I just don’t understand
how it can still hurt so badly.
How my heart can still be broken.
It’s like all the air leaves the room
All over again
I find myself alone
I don’t see how I can possibly
survive it.
It’s not all the time
Tomorrow I won’t feel like this.
But I know it won’t be the last time
I know I’ll sink down low again.
I wish I could rid my soul of him,
of ever loving him,
of ever being loved by him,
of ever knowing him.

Do you see those shattered bricks on the ground?
The ones you kick every time you pass by?
That broken mess that you joke about with your friends?

That was my safe place.
Those ***** bricks were once much more.
They made up the walls around my heart.
A sanctuary.
Beautiful and gold.
They kept me safe from the harm that you bestowed upon me.
Thunder, storm, a hurricane,
Nothing was capable of breaking it down.
It saved me from fire and from ice.
It helped me live, survive.

It could not be broken from the outside.
But you knew a way in.
You fooled that shy little girl into believing that you were the one.
Her naive nature let you inside, with hopes
That you would bring flowers into that lonely sanctuary,
And fill it with Love.

You desired none of that.
You pulled her into the darkness
Where no moon and stars could reach her.
She was alone with a monster that she let inside herself.
And there, the deed was done.
Before she knew it, you were gone.
Leaving her empty and even more alone.

The walls fell slowly.
Breaking everything in their sight.
Leaving no mercy.
Taking down her heart too.
Leaving it like a rotten fruit.
Dark and *****.
With scratches and bruises.
Completely demolished.

Years went by.
She had all the time in the world to rebuild her safe zone.
But no strength was left.
Her will was gone.
Her power vanished.
So she waited.
For someone to come and help her recover from the pain and trauma.
But no one wants a broken doll.
A misused, beaten, little doll.

Alone she lived while years went by.
Without you, or them, or anyone, by her side.
Her tears dried up.
Her peachy fresh body turned to sharp edgy bones.
She no longer believed in Love.
And no longer cared about Life.
She just waited for it to all pass by.

And so it did.
Her only joy now is seeing her own ribs.
She doesn't let her cuts fade away.
She talks to no one-
Makes them all stay out of her way.

She is dying.
A slow painful death.
Look what you did to her.

Look what you did to me.





I am dying.




You are killing me.



-FreeMind

Darkened room
Dimly lit candle
Flickering to the beat
The beat of the nights love

Gentle soft breathe
Pulled passionately
Softly
Across the neck

Tingling touch
Upon the hips
Shivers down the spine
Uncontrollable twitches

Joined,
Deeply,
Sweating and moaning
Breathing as one.

Painful pleasure
Locks pulled so tight.
Gentle ecstasy
Mmmmmm

Reaching for…….
Again shes gone
Empty arms
Love is dead..