Darkness is what evicts my oh-so-cold soul,
anger and sorrow drips from within me,
my heart pitch black drips hate;
drenched in my coldness my scars ignite,
my skin slit and wounded consistently,
my abhor towards you increments,
if only you knew the pain you afflicted me with,
i take down the path to make you pay,
to regret on your doings,
a revenge not through actions,
preferably my silence,
my lack of expression and my ignorance towards you,
for you put me through so much agony-
that i had to sequester myself from the world,
and shut down all my emotions and extracted out my joy,
now i hope for you to learn from your mistakes,
for my avoidance and silence will make you realize my worth!

I was warned
about the dangers of the night
About the strangers in the dark

But i was never warned
About the boy who break hearts
About the boy who has a heartbeat

And in a heartbeat, I was broken.

—ej

The boy has a lot of scars
At his heart and body
He has a lot of patience
But he does not stop fighting
Because every attack makes him stronger

Your eyes are not as blue as his
Overcast versus July seaside
But your heart is 18k while he is plated
Cheap doesn't last as long
You both tarnish at the sight of me
Kiss my forehead after the other wipes away the hair covering it
Rest your hand on the back of my neck after the other lightly chokes
We find fun within delicacy
Teeth marks on my back
Thorns in my *******
Roses on the bed
Love in the air
But you are the same color as the streets
I've always loved the sun
Yet something is so wonderful about finding happiness in your dreariness
I'm sorry if I choose summer over spring
I am naive
Barely a woman
So I cant withhold anymore drenching
I promise I will love your rain when it pours

I spent my whole life on a ledge,
Safe.
Watching people of all different shapes, sizes, colors, and places,
Fall for this thing called "love".
No matter how many times I watched,
It didn't make any kind of sense to me.

It's simple logic,
Statistics,
Physics,
And math.
That if you fall,
Gravity will pull you down,
And you will get hurt.

I was content on that ledge,
With no desire whatsoever,
To follow the masses in the plunge,
Happy,
Until I met you.

You found me there.
Knowing that I was an innocent,
A skeptic,
A challenge,
And you changed my world.

At first we just talked,
Argued,
Laughed,
And talked.
And no matter how hard I tried to get rid of you,
You stayed.

You listened to my hopes, dreams, thoughts, and fears,
You told me yours.
And then one day,
Without any kind of warning,
You jumped,
Right in front of me.

Scared out of my mind,
I ran to the edge and looked down,
But you were fine,
Floating,
Soaring,
Day after day, after day, after day.
And no matter how hard I tried to get you to come back,
You wouldn't.

You teased me,
You coaxed me,
And eventually,
You wore me down.
Because the longer I stayed up there,
The further I was from the only person I wanted to be with,
You.

So I forgot everything I knew,
And I jumped.
At first,
We fell together.
And it was exhilarating,
Powerful,
Magical,
The biggest rush I have ever felt.

But then,
I looked next to me,
And you weren't there anymore.
You stopped.
Without telling me,
Or even teaching me how.

And the rest?
Was pain.
Me watching the ground I was about to crash into move closer,
And closer.
Me looking up,
Searching for you,
Screaming,
Begging for your help,
Reassuring myself that you would save me.
Because after all,
You're the one who told me to jump in the first place.
But I was wrong.

You watched me fall in panic for weeks,
Until I finally smacked into the ground,
And shattered,
Into a million, uneven pieces.
Without any attempt whatsoever to catch me,
Or break my fall.

So here I lay,
Alone and scattered,
In fragments so jagged,
They hurt to touch,
Riddled with the seemingly impossible task of getting myself together,
And back up to where it all began,
The ledge.

Addicted to your touch
Long for your embrace
Wish I could tell you how I feel
Your brown skin against mine
Caressing the contours of your face
This feeling inside
Is getting harder to hide
I dread the day that I might accidentally blurt out those three words
Should I hide hide how I feel
Is what im feeling real?
Should I let my love soar?
Or should I close that door?
Im unsure
Don't have a cure
My black beauty
Could you possibly love me?
This is not a fantasy