If you want to die,
I won't stop you.
If you want to cause self-harm,
I won't yell at you.
If you don't care about anything,
I can't make you.
If you want to lose everything,
that's not my problem.
I'm sorry,
but I'm tired of saying things over and over.
*I'm sorry…

The Bridges were burned,
now it's your turn to cry.

I look but don't see
touch but don't feel
and talk but don't speak
I know can still do that
but I won't.

There was a young girl and her name was Carrie
All she would dream of was being a Fairy
She would come home with tears down her face
Thinking of the words said made her heart pace
To the park she would go to try and get a look
Writing and drawing in her small book
One day she as was there jumping towards the sky
When all of a sudden she heard a small cry
She looked to her feet to behold a rare sight
A small frail fairy starring up at her in fright
She picked up the being and took it back home
Up to her room where it could freely roam
As the days went on the fairy grew sad
Because of that Carrie became mad
One day the fairy had asked to go
Carrie was so mad that she roared out a ‘NO’
The fairy’s heart hurt
For Carrie had begun to treat it like dirt
Slowly the fairy thought of a way
When Carrie would leave it’d ask to come play
Carrie accepted without a clue
But before the time came she already knew
Before she had left she locked the fairy up
Away it went in a small plastic cup
Loudly the fairy screamed out for mercy
Calmly Carrie said ‘You should have loved me”
She picked up a lighter and set it aflame
Looking down at the fairy with no hint of shame
As the cup lit up and the golden flames licked out
Carrie covered her ears as the fairy began to shout
She grinned at the cup with no hint of remorse
From that moment on her life went off course
She soon became crazy and also was bitter
Mad at that fairy for not wanting to be with her
She then gave up with keeping up with her lie
And quickly decided it was her turn to die
She wrote a short letter for all those who cared
Re writing the life of which she had bared
The finale few lines spoke of her fears
But only the last two were covered in tears
These were the words that were said
Right before Carrie had shot herself in the head
I am a young girl and my name is Carrie
As I grew up I dreamed of being a fairy
People would laugh and break my joy
They didn’t realize that I wasn’t a toy
My dream soon came true in a sick twisted way
I didn’t know that I would turn around and say
That fairies aren’t real to those who don’t see
And being able to know one comes at a fee
I was one of the few who had to pay that cost
I was once found but now I am lost
I am ready to go for the clock is ticking
My heart and soul is now one for the picking
I guess it is time to reveal all kept hidden
For I was the one that had it forbidden
Because I am a young girl and my name is Carrie
And I’m leaving this world the queen of all fairies.

I know I shouldn’t do this; I gotta let it go
But after all these years quiet; I’m gonna let you know
I’m so sick and tired of you leaving me
Tired of bearing the tears that you refuse to see
Remember all those times you said that you’d be there
But then you turned around and left without a care
Momma says you love me, is that even true?
I mean with the way you’ve been actin’ I never knew
I’ve been told that you are sick in the head
So I lay down in my bed
Wondering if you care
Or if you are truly there
My head is spinning
The dark thoughts are winning
Hell I know you took yourself to court over some ******* child support
Is that all I am to you?
Some child that leeches off of you?
A young girl begging for love
But knows that she can’t even get a simple hug
But dad you should know
That even through the pain
And the attempts to reach out but went to vain
I’ll never give up or let you go

By the time I was your age
I'd give anything
to fall in love truly was all i could think
that's when i met your mother
the girl of my dreams
the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen

She said, "boy can i tell you a wonderful thing?"
I cant help but notice you staring at me
I know i shouldn't say this
But, i really believe i can tell by your eyes
That you're in love with me

Now, son I'm only telling you this
Because life can do terrible things

Now most of the time we'd have too much to drink
We'd laugh at the stars and we'd share everything
Too young to notice and too dumb to care
But, love was a story that couldnt compare

I said, "girl can i tell you a wonderful thing?"
I made you a present with paper and string
Open with care now im asking you please
You know that i love you, will you marry me

Now son, im only telling you this
Because life can do terrible things

Youll learn one day ill hope and ill pray
That god shows you differently

She said boy can i tell you a terrible thing
Seems that im sick and ive only got weeks
Please dont be sad now, i really believe
You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me

Slow,
I fell to the ground on my knees

Don't fall in love
It's just too much to lose
if given the choice
Then I'm begging you to choose
To walk away,
Dont let her get you
I cant bare to see the same
Happen to you

Now, son im only telling you this
Cause, life can do terrible things

i really need to get some sleep
but here i am, over analyzing everything.

i can't even open up to anyone
without it being a joke.
you think all those jokes about wishing i was dead
are jokes?

i understand that you don't know me well enough
to understand what i'm trying to say
and why there is a half second of silence before the laughter
when they try to figure out if i mean it or not.

just because i don't look upset
or look unsettled
or look insane
or look
i don't know,
doesn't mean a thing.

just because i have no intent
doesn't mean my mind is silent.

maybe i'm just really smart,
keeping quiet,
too quiet.

i laugh about my problems
because it's the only way i can pretend they're not serious,
the only way i can control my emotions,
and then when i'm honest
for half a second,
it scares you.

you run away.

i thought we were going to be great friends,
but honestly,
who cares?