Soon I will start healing
At least that's what I hope
It's what I tell myself each night
To ease my grief and help me cope

What a cruel reality
The lonely ditch I've dug
No words to describe the depth of my pain
No one to listen
Nobody to hug

A terrible lie resounds in my head
"It's all your fault "
A voice declares
A barrage of negative beliefs cavort
In a twisted game of musical chairs

Broken promise of forever
Remaining shards rest in my hands
Along with the fading traces
Of our once-unified plans

Imprisoned by sweet memories
Held captive in their embrace
Try to take a step forward
But my feet are frozen in place

Never have I felt so low
Crushed by overwhelming desire
Not understanding how attraction so strong
Could suddenly with no warning expire

I yearn for happiness I had
Before blue skies turned grey
Now the closest to joy I will get
Are those moments in my mind I replay

An awful truth I must accept
Is that you are never coming back
And since you left my heart has darkened
To an ugly shade of bluish-black

I fear my tomorrows will all be the same
In this tunnel I see no light at the end
It has been a whole year since goodbye
And these wounds haven't yet begun to mend

Set my soul free from misery
And the love to which it is bound
Maybe then I will uncover peace
That so far cannot be found

I'm not pretty but that is what they say
Do not believe yet still I reply "okay"
I have cuts across my heart
Sorrow portrayed as a work of art
I'm always sleeping in late
Life lived in a foggy state
Dark circles rest on face
I've had plenty hours
In dreamland dancing barefoot picking flowers
Permanently bitter due to much neglect
Too far gone for innocence to ever ressurect
I'm too cynical to let anyone near
Not warm enough so people disappear
And I cannot fathom why anyone would stay
It's no surprise when good things slip away
I fake laughter to disuassade any concern
Joy is a blessing for which I desperately yearn
But in conversation I act like I am fine
Do very best not to reveal a single sign
I wear dark eyeliner to match my point of view  
Even black isn't quite enough to mimic the hue
Because insecurities constantly bring me down
Erasing smile then replacing with frown
I self isolate
I know deep inside
Loved ones would be better off if I died

I'm broke and alone
into a river a stone
a desert bleach bone
don't answer a phone

I’m really scared
Im loosing it
My fragile mind
Slowly bruising it
I think too much
Overusing it
it’s my fault
But I keep doing it

You're more beautiful
And more outstanding and bright
Than you'll ever know.

You mimic the Moon
Twelve foreseeable phases
Infinite faces