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 Sep 2018 Clover
Spades
I always have this nightmare.

This nightmare has no ghosts, or zombies, or anything unreal.
This nightmare I have is about a sad boy, who hates the world and struggles with everything in life.
This nightmare is about a boy who can’t focus on studying  because he has to focus on keeping the rope under the bed.

This nightmare is about a boy who can’t focus on eating because he has to fight that urge whenever crossing a bridge.
This nightmare is about a boy who can’t have friends because of his anxiety and his lack of ability to cope with life.
This nightmare is about a boy who uses alcohol and drugs as a crutch because it works better than therapy and pills.

This nightmare is about a boy who still cries over his mother, creating memories of her instead of reliving them because she was gone before he was born.
This nightmare is about a boy with no dad because he ran away from the future of this boy.
This nightmare is about a boy who tries to forget about the pain by inflicting pain on himself.

This nightmare is about a sad boy who is lost.

This nightmare is real.

That boy is me.

I’m still waiting to wake up.
I don't know anymore :(
 Sep 2018 Clover
Mae
My attempt.
 Sep 2018 Clover
Mae
The sky cries for me
I walk alone
No thoughts or feelings
Just a desire to go
To the river
Into the river
Just to float
And maybe drown

My blue hair ripples
Cold water makes my body panic
My lungs are gasping
I fall under
Riding the current
Wherever it wants me to go
I float back to the surface
Thanks to my empty soul
Today's not the day
Perhaps tomorrow
 Sep 2018 Clover
Nobody
Broke
 Sep 2018 Clover
Nobody
Time is on your side,
what a beautiful lie;
so many reasons to cry,
so many wishes to die.
Spare time is worse,
to reflect on your curse;
when life moves this slow
you prefer a physical blow.
You just want to go,
you’re sick of feeling alone;
you quit asking why
when you’re too tired to try.
You barely get by
and long for the end,
this hand you were dealt
you can’t ever amend.
You'd rather fold,
It's getting so old.
Your life's a joke;
even with money,
you'll always be broke.
 Sep 2018 Clover
Corinne
this shower couldn't be any hotter
but there's some things you can't wash off
the feel of his eyes on your skin
the hope in your mind when you're still innocent,
these marks and scars will stay
until i'm skinny, old and gray
they do not make me who i am
just remind me of a price i was forced to pay,
surviving doesn't make me feel strong
no matter how tough
because there's some things you can't wash off
and the water is never hot enough
 Jan 2018 Clover
Cíara McNamara
There is beauty within failure*
Is my life then a tale of a fair maiden
surrounded by a macabre beauty?


Then it is not the tragedy
written in my sins
on bloodstained paper
that I've been practicing


Or is the beauty in
learning from you failures?
'Cause then all these lessons have been lost on me
 Jan 2018 Clover
Wyatt
Your eyes, my eyes.
My face sees your face.
My cheeks turn red
and I look away.
******, ****** feelings.
I don't even know you.
Why is it like this?

Your eyes, my eyes.
My face sees your face.
Pretending I'm not here,
there's no trace.
******, ****** me.
I don't even know what to do.
When did ever it get like this?

Your eyes, my eyes.
My face sees your face.
My cheeks turn red
and I look away.
I look away.
 Jan 2018 Clover
lux
new flesch
 Jan 2018 Clover
lux
don't be afraid to let your body die
to transform
into a new place to live
to grow
to make art
to be a home
to know peace
‎to live to love to grow old
oct 19 2017. pretend its being read by the guy from bright eyes. (bad i know)
 Dec 2017 Clover
sh
i am an ice cream.
the way you look at me is
just so hot, i melt.
*s.h.
You never really know how strong you are until you're alone,
crying and forced to pick yourself up off the floor.
That is when you can truly see how big your emotional muscles are
and I promise
they are bigger than you ever thought possible.
Flex them.
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