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Jun 2014 · 411
Untitled #4
Arran James Jun 2014
The only good calling off there is
Is the kind that
Calls the calling off off
Jun 2014 · 1.5k
Autumn
Arran James Jun 2014
My favourite season is autumn
When the darkness starts to surround you
Like a comforting embrace across your entire existence

It's like when you take a bath
And the water temperature matches your body's
And you can't differentiate
Where the water starts
And where your skin ends
Like taking flight

That's what autumn is to me
The exterior darkness
Undistinguishable
To my internal void

My soul leaking from every pore

I exist everywhere and nowhere simultaneously
It's freeing really. Detached from my earthly vessel
Jun 2014 · 375
Untitled #3
Arran James Jun 2014
I don't think I can ever make enemies
were probably just gonna end up bonding over how much we hate me
Jun 2014 · 643
Modification
Arran James Jun 2014
I've been breaking my bones trying to reshape them to make your eyes comfortable
I've been going under cognitive reconstruction to shelter your mind
I've been feeding spars flames to this piece of firewood just so I don't burn you

I will no longer dilute myself just to have the right to exist
While you flaunt all your raw intensity
Just because you have normativity holding your hand
Jun 2014 · 612
Dear Amor,
Arran James Jun 2014
You have been greatly misinformed,
who told you you can pick and choose
when to practice unconditional love?
Shout out to ma mum
  Oh the irony of your name
Jun 2014 · 337
Untitled #2
Arran James Jun 2014
Poems are my way of communicating without the commitment
Jun 2014 · 1.0k
Cacti
Arran James Jun 2014
"While its true that these plants are tough, and can usually survive under such circumstances, most certainly will not thrive."
Don't forget there's a difference between
existence
and
*sentience
It's a strange day when you learn you identify with a cactus
Jun 2014 · 583
Diary Entry #3
Arran James Jun 2014
14.12.13, 00:18

Then I figured, no ones going to validate my feelings but me so:
   *'Your feelings matter and although this maybe temporary,
         it still exists and therefor it is real'
Jun 2014 · 1.0k
Diary Entry #2
Arran James Jun 2014
27.2.14

My poster looks like it's about to fall off and all I'm doing is pushing it back to the blue tack even though I know it's going to fall again.

I think that's a metaphor for my life at the moment
Jun 2014 · 1.6k
Diary Entry #1
Arran James Jun 2014
25.2.14

Our lives are as short as mayflys lifespan in the eyes of celestial beings
Jun 2014 · 837
Agree
Arran James Jun 2014
It only hurts because you agree
Jun 2014 · 4.8k
Egg
Arran James Jun 2014
Egg
The best way to get the broken pieces of an egg out of your omelette
Is using half the shell to pick it up while it's still raw

Maybe you're the best qualified to pick up your own broken pieces
Jun 2014 · 1.2k
Take Shit
Arran James Jun 2014
You take that **** thrusted upon you
You pick out the nutrients from that compost
And make it work in your favour
Grow from it
Because
Because god ******* ****** you're worth more than this
And you know it

Root yourself
Anchor using your values
Build that steady foundation

Then take it from the bottom up
Defy gravity
Chasing the sun

And after your beautiful bloom
You will die
But not in vain

Others will stem from your knowledge left behind in the soil
May 2014 · 499
Inquiry
Arran James May 2014
Satans
Jolly symphony
Pounding
Your wealthy head
Together you ask sweet sweetly
How
When
If
She's
Returning
May 2014 · 1.2k
3am Me
Arran James May 2014
Three am me is three year old me
Old soul
Star gazing
Offering you a shot of ***** with complimentary existential crisis
May 2014 · 613
Name
Arran James May 2014
Demons used to pay me a visit every night
People told me to say the name of The Lord

I said no

They will learn to fear my own **** name
I used to suffer from a lot of sleep paralysis induced by my anxiety
May 2014 · 704
Favourite
Arran James May 2014
My favourite relaxation method is *apathy
I woke up this morning for the seventh time and this was my first thought
May 2014 · 633
No
Arran James May 2014
No
I said no when my doctor asked me if I had suicidal thoughts
Cause for me it's never been like it is in films

I've never pictured it as a circle of blood around the drain hole

It's not a dramatic shot of my feet kicking off a stool a struggle and silence

It's not a freeing pose into the wind

It's not a collection of words to express my apology for the last time

It's not an artistic shot of 50 pills out of the bottle

It's always looked like walking out
A mundane, anti climactic, boring image
It feels tedious because it's been a routine for months
There's a difference between dying and committing suicide
You die long before you commit suicide
May 2014 · 1.3k
Untitled
Arran James May 2014
Very much like the idea of energy never been made nor lost
This love isn't disappearing
It's converting
Into something more stable and manegable and malleable and sustainable

— The End —