You're the only one I ever sought,
You're so hot,
My eyes were caught.
Beauty was easily spot.
You were always in my thoughts.
You showed me a lot,
I would never forget,
You tied me like a knot,
Was it the initial plot?
I guess we should take a shot.

Take it slow and don't haste,
Or your effort would be nothing but a waste

The emptiest hearts,
Are the heaviest to carry.

I'm sorry I couldn't make you smile,
I know I'm not worthwhile.
Remember I'll always go the extra mile.
I know you think I'm vile.
You're so versatile,
That's your style.
Every once in a while,
We flow like water in the Nile.
But usually I'm the odd tile.

Why is the world so complicated,
So populated.
Whoever you are, you're hated.
Trust has already faded.
People acting,
Reality, just backstabbing.
I'm just asking,
To remove that masking.
Your true colours are contrasting.
Throw countless insults at me,
That's if you're free,
Point my flaws and I'd agree
Try and see.
You ain't perfect too.
Here's a clue,
Something about you.
Your imperfection is true.
Step aside and do something new.

I'm missing you like crazy,
Surviving ain't easy.
Without you I'm lazy.
My thoughts so noisy,
While I'm feeling so lonely.
Everything so empty.
Maybe you aren't ready,
So let's not get hasty.
The time we've got are plenty.
Let's start friendly,
Then we can get steady
Even until we're twenty.
The possibilities, so many.
So everything matters, even how petty.
I wouldn't want any.
Except the one with you already.

She likes me, I like her
But we're not together

To live life the normal way,
Is to tell myself I'm okay.

I just wanna say Thank You,
To just show you my appreciation.
For what you always do.
No need for any explanation.

You're wonderful
You should know that.
You make life colourful.
Stay and have a chat.

Everyone is considered special,
No one is unwanted.
Treat people, you must be careful.
Don't take it for granted.

Everyone has their feelings.
They mean a lot.
After all, they're human beings.
It's all about the thought.

Learn to appreciate,
Leave the bad aside.
It would be really great,
If everyone would abide.

All you need are eyes,
To notice the outer beauty.
It takes a heart,
To realise the beauty within.

It's how our eyes perceive,
Yet it can deceive.

A heart can reveal the truth,
Allows all your concerns to soothe.

You were the one,
But now we're done.
When it begun,
It felt fun.
Now I'm just stunned.

Happiness conceived;
Disappointment received.
I really believed
But you just deceived.

Never trust what meets the eye,
It's not easy to defy
The reason why,
Try to be a good guy,
And all you get is a good bye

I remember that day,
You said you'd stay
But look where we are today.
Both of us have gone a separate way.

Your words still leave me hanging,
Somehow the wounds are still hurting
They say time will do the healing,
But I'm still feeling the pain and suffering.

I'd tell myself, It's over and it doesn't matter,
I still reminisce our petty late night chatter,
Your contagious whimsical laughter.
I feel that wasn't the right answer.

You said you cared and loved
I took your word for granted.
Thinking it was truthful and believed,
Instead I was playfully deceived.

Time, effort, have gone to vain,
It all went down the drain,
Causing an immense pain,
Which scarred me to love again.

Your fabrication and dishonesty,
Maybe I'm losing my sanity.
I don't need an apology
For someone I'd call a phony.

Everyone has their one best friend,
Those who they fully depend.
There are other like me, who try to befriend.
Try really hard to blend.
Trust me, I don't pretend.
I don't portend,
I don't mean to offend
I don't want to contend.
A change won't ever impend.
There's no way to amend.
And I don't expect you to comprehend.
Everything seems to have an end.

But it won't ever end, if it never started.

Tonight the world shines bright,
With those bright city lights.
Everyone carries on with their daily routine,
In an ordinary life scene.
I will be left unnoticed,
With an ulterior motive.
I will sneak out like a ninja,
Some may call this a stigma.
I will escape alone,
Away from the sins that I would've atone
This is a short procedure,
To awaken the Grim Reaper.
As I escape reality,
Remove this surreal mortality,
After my departure,
I will follow the path that aperture.
No one will realise this,
This all happens in a blitz.
Suddenly, I lose consciousness.
Fully aware of the consequences.
My head turns drowsy,
My vision turns cloudy.
I will say my final goodbyes.
And slowly close my eyes.

When I see you suffering such excruciating pain,
I feel useless and efforts will go in vain.
Unfortunately, happiness wasn't what I could maintain.
You're the reason why I'm sane.

I wonder why am I here for?
I'm of no use and such a bore.
Some may even say I'm an eyesore.
What can I say? These things happened before.

I just wonder and realise how I'm so helpless,
In this situation, I'm more hopeless.
Don't fret cause I'm fearless
But will I withstand in this loneliness?

You think you're good,
But you just misunderstood.
You think we should be perfect.
I don't wanna disrespect,
But we make mistakes.
Just give us a break.
Stop pointing out our flaws,
We're not breaking any laws.
It's a learning process.
So, be more modest.
You annoy me,
I'm sure you can see.
Change your attitude,
We'll be overwhelmed by gratitude.
Change for the better,
You won't regret after.

People try to right the wrongs in me,
Eventually I have to agree.

After I make my change,
Oddly, it’s always kind of strange.

People end up catching on my bad habit,
Change doesn’t happen too rapid.



*but eventually people WILL change

I'm starting to wonder,
If you ever cared.
Beneath your smile is there something under?
Am I just a huge burden you endured.
You used to be the best in my eyes
But now you're different.
There's something you're trying to disguise.
You no longer show any sign of interest.
I know I'm annoying to everyone.
You can leave if you want to,
Leave what has already been done.
You can exit without leaving a clue
Because I won't be chasing after you,
I'm busy picking myself up
The pain I've been put through
The scars are hidden unless you go closeup
Wounds wil always heal
But scars are there forever.
It may sound surreal
But there is no error.

How foolish of me,
my eyes so blind I couldn't see.
Why did I even bother trying,
I'd eventually fail while sighing,
This was all my wrong doing
I hate this feeling.
What was wrong with me
I had no opportunity.
Not even a single chance,
My mind stuck in a trance.
You'd fall for the other
I'm sorry I ever bother.
I'd never forget you,
Even if I'm your number two.
Hold on, I'm the isolated one
Go ahead and enjoy the fun.
I'll sit back and depress
But for your sake, all my feelings will suppress.
Don't worry about me.
My mind has been set free.
I won't give up on you, sadly I gave up on myself.
Just promise me you'll take care of yourself.

I got friends and family who care,
They were always there.






*At least they were.

Isolation.
My loner self's building foundation.
The leading cause of my devastation.
Isolation, the reason of my creation
At least there's relaxation.
Why's there even discrimination.
I stopped all the procrastination
To help with the world in manipulation
I'm driven by self determination
However I'm unnecessary in the formation
I suffer so much accusation
My will to continue is such an admiration
Everyone doing something with aggravation
Their ignorance is such a fascination
Yet I want an explanation,
What's the complication?
Anything you'll accept as compensation?
If you've done some observation
You'll notice my only motivation
Aside from my hate toleration,
What kept me going is my impersonation
Making you think my life's okay
In actual fact I'm in condemnation.

I never really understood,
The point in being good.
They tell you to be nice,
Or you’d pay the price.

They tell you to be subtle,
Don’t cause any trouble.
You’d make life tougher,
And leave more people to suffer.

Whoever is that dude,
Just don’t be rude.
Get rid of that attitude
Then you’ll find gratitude.

They tell you to be helpful,
Or you live a life regretful.
You can reduce all the hate,
Now wouldn’t that be great?

They tell you to be caring,
Be a wonderful blessing.
Always lend an ear,
To remind them you are here.

All the poems I ever wrote,
No one came by with a boat.
When my feelings sunk deep,
I just cried myself to sleep.

I don’t understand at all,
I tried to be nice
I tried to be caring
I tried to be helpful
I tried to be subtle
I tried not to be rude
I tried to be there for people
I tried.

I don’t get what this is all about
But **** this, I’m out.

Life is like a game we play,
It can take quite long, even a whole day.
On a typical game, they try to make you lose.
Either way, you still can't refuse.
There's still a slight possibility of victory,
The cheat to this game is still a mystery.
The odds are never in your favour.
There's no one to be your so called 'saviour'.
You're on your own,
What ever you're doing, you're still alone.
Forming alliances is a choice,
It's a risk, go ahead and roll the dice.
Are you certain you can trust the person?
Will he be a burden.
Doubts certainly creates restrictions,
Unsure which voice you should listen.
The game of life is truly balanced,
It makes it more of a challenge.
Although it may seem biased,
I've gotta be honest,
It's fair and doesn't go your way,
Even if it doesn't go your way, you can't run away.
You have to stay,
Until the end of the day.
Continue to play,
Do not disobey.
The rules of life are simple,
They just come in a complicated riddle.
Solve the unique puzzle,
Avoid causing any trouble.

These feelings I'm feeling, they're slowly building.
No matter how much I keep trying, It's still quite revealing.
There's something missing, I've tried looking.
I'm still wondering and thinking, what's the meaning.
Every time it's morning, I'm falling,
But I start questioning, Am I truly willing?
My thoughts starts speaking, I'm carefully listening.
Then again where I'm going, would I be leaving?
Or would I be staying, But where would this be leading?
I've tried believing, I've got nothing;
Something that I'm doing, Is it worth living?
Am I resisting, Should I be fleeing
What am I doing? , voices starts exploding.
Why am I still running, I'm not the one leading.
I'm just only hoping, it would start healing.
I'm still bleeding.
I'm dying.
I'm a human being.
So am I dreaming?
'Cause I'm still breathing.
Resistance is futile when I'm losing.
The truth is killing
Because no way I would be winning.

I just love the way she talks
When we stand beside and walk.
I love that smile of hers
It's not like the other girls
I love her laughter
It makes everyday so much better
I love the way she looks into my eyes
She doesn't do it to any other guys
I love everything about her
Because I love her.

Somethings seems within our grasp, however still so far.
Everything was going well but I just was never on par.
Distances so large, like us and the night sky's star.
Trapped in this, no escape like a sealed jar.

Everyday we lessen the gap, nowhere near narrow.
The possibility of failure, I think it's quite scary.
The bond turns weak overtime, somehow weaker than a barrow.
Just hoping for a sudden change, a projected arrow.

Every time when I see you, I try to converse.
As we indulge, I just feel like I made it worse.
I can't understand, Is this some sort of curse?
I guess it just might be how we're so diverse.

To be honest with you, I don't think I'm the right guy.
I kinda think that our paths have gone awry.
I need to accept this fate, no way I can ever deny.
All the hopes hit rock bottom, because I held it all high.

All the time I ever spent with you, was all in bliss.
I would do anything for the time I would've miss.
Every night, my thoughts, I'd reminisce.
Did all this just broke apart and fell into an abyss?

You probably never liked me in the first place.
You're one of a kind, no one to even replace.
I'll back up for your sake, to give you your space.
Worst comes to worst, my existence can efface.

Even if you leave, you'll still be my one true crush,
All these feelings would never go down in a flush.
The thought about you makes me blush.
In the end, all this love. We shouldn't rush.

I love how you put a smile on me every time I see you.
When I first saw you I had already knew,
This love is no doubt true.
All these feels really new.

You're spontaneous in so many ways,
You make any guy craze,
Your everything is something to praise.
Every time I'm still amazed.

You don't see me as I do towards you,
Because everything I am to you.
It's always a number two.
I question, what do I do?

It's funny how you're not taken,
If I'm not mistaken.
You're an addiction.
A real true limited edition.

Sometimes I kind of forget your name,
Yeah that's quite lame
But that's fine,
I'll just call you mine.

I'm always the odd one
Everyone enjoying the fun
I'm alone with my mind lost,
I'm gonna always be the last
Everyone has that one friend
Who they can fully depend
But I'm just a **** loner
Trying to get closer
But as I grew older
I gave up and said this is over.

The world is just a big reminder,
Nothing ever goes as you desire.
The situation always seem tighter.
Your mind seemingly going haywire.
Nothing to cling onto,
No one out there to save you.
Fallen to a deep abyss,
Yet you can't resist.

However, you should never give in,
This wasn't how it has been.
No matter what situation life puts you under,
Is never too major for you to get over.
Everyone will always remember,
That one fighter.
The survivor,

*You.

I know you wanted your space,
You said it up my face
No worries my presence will erase
Leaving not even the slightest trace

You never needed me
I'm like a fish in the big blue sea
Unnecessary, Yes I agree
It's the best I could be

I'm useless to you,
If only I knew,
I could make an undo
Then you wouldn't have to ever be blue

Your happiness is mine
Regardless how much it hurts, I'm fine
Even if the truth is malign
Anything to see your smile, it's divine

This can't last forever
Even if we endeavour
The outcome after
Will always end up as never

I guess you weren't the right person
I'd only make your suffering worsen
I've got no purpose
As I'm such a burden

You deserve someone better
Someone more clever
Eliminates all risks of danger
Your one true lover

If you aren't gonna be a peer,
I'd suggest you disappear.

I really love you,
Yes I do.
I'm not trying to get attention
Just something I wanna mention.
You're so amazing.
The one I've been waiting.
The one I'm falling for,
Someone I really adore.
I love everything about you,
Your care when I'm blue.
Your looks so spontaneous,
It's really contagious.
You're one of a kind,
So fine,
Hard to find,
Hope you could be mine.

You enlighten my mood,
You help me feel good.
Even when times are rough and life's rude
Even when I want to seclude
You were my light
The one that was really polite
Made sure I was alright
Everything felt so right
You were the caring one
Your effort was constantly overdone
You turned everything to something fun
I'd wish for a rerun
Now everything has changed
I feel estranged
Maybe that's why I'm deranged
Everything was unchanged
Until you met that guy
Someone else to rely
No longer need my reply
It's fine cause I'm always like a stand-by.

Have you felt so heartbroken,
Wishing you were omnipotent.
Do you sometimes feel worthless,
Your future seems uncertain.
Weak and hopeless,
Unwanted and useless.
Forgotten and placed aside,
Left alone outside.
Everything so surreal,
No longer appeal.
Love was desirable,
Like an amazing miracle.
I thought I was responsible,
Thinking this was bearable.
But I was definitely incapable.
I was so terrible,
I thought this relationship was durable
But in reality, was just vulnerable.
I thought this pain was repairable
The end was inevitable,
My predictions were simply remarkable,
As it ended up really horrible.

Watching you meet another guy
Can't help but lie,
Trying so hard to deny,
That was a solemn goodbye

Is it my fault for holding on
Reminiscing of the times that had foregone
Is it wrong to dwell on
Or should I just let bygones be bygones

I've been looking for a remedy
Someone else I could rely
But I'm not sure if my heart's ready,
I still get a little envy.

I cause too much trouble,
I try to be subtle,
But I just struggle.
So I try to be careful.

Even with all my might, I never do anything right.
I thought it was alright but just not quite.
Don't pick a fight, don't cause any fright.
So just sit upright, and hold on tight.

I am not needed, just left there seated.
I even pleaded but still unwanted.
I was greeted, yet mistreated.
Their goal completed, I was left defeated.

I am just useless, a plain nuisance.
All the rudeness but I'm still helpless.
I was so careless, now this is endless.
I'm breathless and friendless.

My presence is ignored, is this my reward?
I may look bored, deep down my feelings all stored.
Happiness can't be restored, after what I've been treated towards.
Everyone's life and happiness is what I adored but I could never afford.

I may have a problem, it isn't boredom.
Even though I hit rock bottom, The problem isn't 'em.
I may have fallen, it's not even awesome.
For me this is common, as it happens quite often.

I am just hated, they fill me with hatred.
I'm already shaded, my true self faded.
Pain is what I've tasted, I cover myself with colours painted.
This is probably fated but in the end I'm nothing but wasted.
You can never find this related, I've always waited.
Right now, it's belated, my brain debated.
My mind escalated, My actions demonstrated.
Among everyone, I'm the one segregated.

I wish you were mine,
Your beauty is divine.
Your personality brightly shines.
Your overall is just so fine.

I just look at the sky, wonder why.
No matter how much I try, You'd probably deny.
I'd always do something awry, You'd just decry.
I wouldn't wanna be shy, but you make me wanna cry.
Even when the tears are dry. I'm not the one you'd rely.
Well, I'm not the tough guy,
***** the retry,
F*ck those other guys,
I don't need a reply.
I don't need a goodbye.
I'll just go die.

Love was never based on effort,
I could spend my whole time for you
But a guy can just come by and you'd go with him
And I'm left here to pick up my broken pieces

I wished things would get better.
It's obvious and I already knew
My love that once was bright, now  it's just really dim.
I'm just so speechless.

Everyday, the thought of it made me grow sadder.
Everything just seems so blue
This poem ain't vim.
I remember how everything used to be filled with sweetness.

We need to learn to be clever,
Accept what's already true.
To understand she's got him.
Now my life's filled with bleakness.

I am really sorry,
To ever make you worry.
I know it's my fault.
All the pain you had to dealt
No one should have to felt.
Even till the end,
A hand, I couldn't lend.
How could I ever help
Voice our your problem
I will listen without boredom.
Oh right, I'm the issue,
What can I do?
I could never do enough
Even when your times are rough.
I was utterly useless,
My capabilities all hopeless
My efforts all futile.
But I need your time, just awhile.
Clear things up and tell me
All the things that happened,
Everything you had a problem
Anything you couldn't find a solution
Something I could be of help to you.
Right now,
I understand it so well, I'm the one who should be leaving.
I'm being too much of a hassle.
In the end, I'm still really sorry,
For what I've done.

So much work everyday,
Yet I can't back away.
So much stress,
Can't the work be any less.
Ain't making much progress
Won't reach success
Because procrastination is what I possess.
The work may depress,
Due to the amount being excess.
Is the person obsessed?
The work, I'm impressed.
Having up 'till recess.
I gotta confess,
That's right you can guess.
What you're thinking, yes.
I'm in such a distress,
Everything's in a mess.
If only the work were lesser,
Everything will be better.

All the relationships may seem real,
But here's the real deal.
We're all probably that third wheel.
I know how you feel.
I know this may not appeal
You'd think this is surreal.
Trust me, I've been through this ordeal.

At least, I'm the only odd one.
The one that society shun,
The truth may stun
This ain't no pun,
There's no fun.
It ***** for what has been done.

Every intimate conversation,
My mind is lost with complication.
I'd always need some clarification.
Or I just shut it and don't make communication.
This is such a frustration.

I think it's best to seclude.
Cause I'm not in the mood
To make anyone exclude.
Wouldn't that just be rude?

This stanza consists of three,
It rhymes with me.
Because three is odd so do I, and I agree.

I'm running out of thoughts,
I'll risk the rhyme and take the coin and toss.

Well, that's about it.

Ever met an opportunity,
A chance that comes once an eternity,
Grasp that chance,
Change your stance.
Seize the day,
Don't turn away.
Claim the victory,
Set the history.
The future isn't set,
So don't sweat.
Make the right choice,
Win the race.
It has already begun,
Don't stop 'till you're done.

I always wonder why I bothered to try,
Knowing I'd end up failing and cry.
So curious, why?
What's worse is my attempt to retry.

I'll always end up failing,
I'll always be praying
For whatever I'm aiming
However, it'll end up fading.

It's fine cause I've learnt my lesson.
To carefully listen
To the voices that deafens.
Hope for the suffering to lessen.

I learn to give up on everything
I need to stop bugging
So quit worrying
The answer to this, is stop breathing.

It hurts knowing,
You don't like me
All these feelings growing
Everything was too easy to foresee

You wouldn't need my presence
I should have been clairvoyant
I won't have to be jealous
Our lives would have been flamboyant

Our fantasised reminiscence
Erased from existence,
There was an obvious difference
The hopes are in evanescence

This poem is a requiem
For our long lost love
An imaginary emblem
Nothing else to top above.