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Xan Abyss Oct 2014
Love can be
A many wretched thing
Can poison wizened minds in ways
A madman couldn't dream
Love can be
A toxin in the blood
That fills the veins with sorcery
Of Lucifer's design

To love is to feel pain
To love is to know hate
To love is to burn away
In unforgiving flames
To love, to love
To love is to be insane

But still it remains, I remember the sight
Of a lost love adorned with the night

Together we lay
Beneath a diamond studded canopy
Of shining stars in the black beyond
Together as one
Souls interlocked, bodies entwined
She and I, alone in the night
The night, the night
She and I alone in the night

To love is to feel pain
To love is to know hate
To love is to burn away
In unforgiving flames
To love, to love
To love is to be insane

And yet it remains, I still remember the sight
Of her beauty adorned with the night

I can't forget
Her face caressed by the moon
The power in each sigh, the sky
And how the stars did bathe in her eyes
I don't regret
The tender warmth of her embrace
The way my name would shape her face
Her touch, her taste
When she was mine in the groves of grace

So let it remain, I still remember the sight
Of her beauty adorned with the night
And though there was pain, on this deadwinter night
I remember the warmth and the light

Of the woman I loved
In the autumn moonlight
And of her pale beauty
Adorned with the night
Of the woman I loved
I still remember the sight
Of her beauty adorned with the night.
I wrote a lot of less-than-happy songs about this particular ex. This one is my favorite though, probably because I'd rather remember the good stuff than the bad.
Xan Abyss Oct 2014
The fires of memory
Burning brightly in my mind, I must
Remember the agony I endured
Desires still rage in me
Pangs of anger mixed with lust
I won't forget the way it hurt

To be alone
Truly alone
With no one to talk to, cause nobody loves you
Sitting at home
Rotting away
Broken & pining for the day you will die all alone

Alone... In the dark
Shadows surrounding
Deep in my own black abyss
Will I wait
Where I have no shadow,
And am truly alone with my hate.

My inner demons miss me
Since I abandoned them for you
The poison deep within me is long overdue
To venomize my love with scorn
A hypnotizing spell
And leave me but an empty shell
Desolate and worn

The thorns of darkness tear my flesh
As I briefly feel the ghost's caress
Of what seems like an old nightmare
I used to have back then
And though my smile retains its warmth
I confess to harboring a storm
Just beneath the surface of my calm exterior

But I remember when
I contemplated death
As a viable prospect
For my future
And never again
Will I fall so far
To consider the ending
A suture.
I was feeling lots of feelings around the time I wrote this. That's what I DO remember about it.
Xan Abyss Oct 2014
It was late on a cold November night that I remember first laying eyes on her. She was sitting in a bar not far from the train station where, upon rare occasion the train would stop as a stranger got off. It was a very rare occurrence, made even rarer with time, that I would see someone worth my attention or time. On the evening preceding this dark November night, I distinctly recall first seeing the sight of this glorious girl, teeth white as pearls, reflecting the light from her gorgeous blonde curls. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, she moved from the train to the ground like a dream, her eyes ignited fires of emerald green, her honey sweet complexion seemed to glow in the flow of the late autumn fog. I saw her in the bar and I flocked to her side. She smiled at me wildly, prepared to take a chance. She had come seeking adventure and a throwaway romance.
I resisted telling her all the thoughts that filled my burning mind. I couldn't bear the thought of her leaving me behind, so I played the strong and silent type, and she kept me by her side. I savored any opportunity to make this angel mine.
She asked me if I knew a place, someplace far away. Some place unpolluted by societal decay. Somewhere we could be alone with no more interruptions. Somewhere our sacred time might continue uncorrupted.
The trees, how lightly they hung in the breeze! It made a perfect canopy for her and for me. We lay on a cliff top that overlooked the sea, just my divine Aphrodite, and me.
She grabbed me with her hands, ice cold, and kissed me madly as my heart took control. My mind engulfed in passionate flames, my self-control melted away. I took her beneath the stars and the moon, and the winds of the sea sang along to our tune. Alone in the air left painted dark blue, we became one in the grace of the gloom. I caressed her face as her body did writhe, euphoric we were in blessed moments of life. We howled like wolves in the roar of the night, bathed in ocean scented moonlight. Our spirits united in a flash of white lightning as the earth seemed to shatter right up into the sky. There was a silence that swept over our time, locking our minds inside each other's eyes. Her lashes batted brightly as her face became a smile. And for a single sweet moment she was perfectly mine.
I unsheathed my knife. Her eyes opened wide as I stabbed her nine times. I watched her die. The perfect stranger.
She'll forever stay mine.
An experiment in stylistic fusion - part prose, part love song, part horror.
Xan Abyss Oct 2014
Her name means the earth
Her eyes are like the sea
Oceanic windows to majestic mysteries
Her skin glows like the moon
Around her smile of ivory
And I stand in the presence of heaven
When she is here before me
Her perfume is a garden of celestial aromas
Her voice is an echo of the comforts of a home
And my heart skips a beat when I hear her say my name because
The beauty that she glows with outshines all I've ever known
She's a goddess in a world of demons
Feet planted in the ground
Head floating in the clouds
Her love is a euphoric feeling
Intoxication
With no comedown
Her body is a grave, an eternal resting place
Inviting, soft and warm - so nice
You'll never want to leave
And I am but a slave to her affection and her grace
Alone at last in her embrace
I forever wish to stay
And at the end of all this time
I'm lost in her oceanic eyes
She is my afterlife,
My world divine
And tonight the world is mine.
I wrote this about someone I no longer speak to. But hey, it's pretty.
Xan Abyss Oct 2014
I just wanna say
You look beautiful today
But I hope that was something
That you knew anyway
I'd just like to see you smile at me
Right now I'd let you lie to me
Because today I'm weak
As you can see
Broken down, worn out, depressed and losing sleep
I don't know what to do
Because my friends all left with you
So I'm back to being alone
With nobody to talk to.
I never meant you harm
Or wished you any sorrow
A heart as pure as yours
Is something I'm unfit to borrow
And I really should have known
That you were more than I deserve
But I was blinded by your radiance
And did my best to make us work.
I want to say 'I love you'
And want to hear it back
But I'm old enough to know better
Than to just relapse like that
And I wish that I could hold you
I'd say 'for one last time'
But I know myself too well by now
And I can't stand goodbyes.
I will ALWAYS love you
And that's a promise I can keep
But you are an Angel
And I am a Monster
And NEVER the twain should meet.
I wrote this about my ex while she sat behind me in class. It's been almost a year and she still doesn't know about it.
Xan Abyss Oct 2014
Warlord, Captain, ruthless man
With a lust for blood and death
Many died as they looked in his eyes
And drew their final breath
The sea was his and his alone
Ferocious as a storm
He sent so many men below
Nowhere was safe from harm

O, the cursed crimson captain
He ruled the mighty seas
The cursed crimson captain
Brought kingdoms to their knees
The cursed crimson captain
He sailed on winds of dread
Many enemies fought, many enemies fled
For the rest would end up dead!

One night, shining swords were drawn
And clashed in the light of the moon
Deadly was the battle fought
T’was there he met his doom
For he fought with The King’s Commander
The battle proved most fierce
And blood spilled over the Pirate’s hand -
The Commander’s breast was pierced
And as the dead man fell to the deck
The Pirate heard a crack
And he himself was forced to his knees
By the musketball in his back

O, the cursed crimson captain
He ruled the mighty seas
The cursed crimson captain
Brought kingdoms to their knees
The cursed crimson captain
Was slain, yet did not know
Which daft and dastardly ******* cast the stone to claim his throne!

Awoke he did to a room of black
A cell of darkness, windows barred
Enraged he became at the craven attack
That nearly pierced his wicked heart
Lust for vengeance filled his soul
As he stared out of the barred window
Only to see, horrified
His ******, violent, crooked life
His ship was stained with the deepest red
As he sailed on through a sea of dead
And he could hear no other sound
Than the weeping wives of husbands drowned
And as he wept he began to bleed
From his back and from his chest
He grew weary, needed sleep
And turned to see a golden bed

O, the cursed crimson captain
Saw clear his legacy
The cursed crimson captain
Collapsed onto his knees

A bed of gold with silken sheets
It beckoned him without a word
The scenes of death began to fade
And the weeping was no longer heard
As he lay upon the bed
It began to change its shape
And grabbed his arms and legs and head
Until there could be no escape

O, the cursed crimson captain
He ruled the mighty seas
The cursed crimson captain
Brought kingdoms to their knees
The cursed crimson captain
Was a fool to sail indeed
For ****** fame in bloodier ways
And leave naught but a life of evil deeds

The room began to flood
Until it was washed away
To reveal a sea of blue
Reflecting golden rays
And his bed was now a casket
A casket made of gold
And was cast into the water
So deep and dark and cold
And as he closed his eyes
Under the crimson waters
All he could do was pray
That he would be Forgotten.
I wrote this a long time ago, better part of a decade now. Still one of my favorite pieces.
Xan Abyss Oct 2014
I gave you the benefit of the doubt
And you corrected me
Clean and disease-free freak
Who still infected me
I extended my heart with both arms
And you rejected me
And now you try to justify
Why you neglected me.
But whatever, right?
Go live your life.
Be YOUR favorite girl, not mine.
Yes I care, I may even cry-
But all my wounds are healed with time.
Stealing hearts is not a crime,
****, why does everything have to rhyme?
There's no rhyme, no reason to this feeling of internal treason
Nothing to say, nothing to do, you're not mine and I don't belong to you
But this feeling of betrayal, I ******* hate it
I wish I could shake it
Or even just take it
Like all the other *******.
But you, you were special
I don't know why you stand out
You were so ******* special
Like a preacher with his hands out
Reaching for the heavens,
Calling out 'Salvation'
Roping me in with your relentless charisma.
I really hate it, can barely take it
The way you made yourself so addictive
So now at the prospect of your eternal absence
My veins itch with fire from the inside out
The creature I slowly become in your shadow
Will leave us with nothing,
Our ambitions devoured.
I'm gonna be honest, I totally forgot about writing this.
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