I remember reading
About Joan of Arc
A heroine
Burnt at the stake
She knew no hellfire after
I remember reading
Bound to the wooden post
She beheld a crucifix
Before her eyes
I think of this
When I need
To lift my chin up
Eyes to the sky
Not the ground

I see so many colors
In a world of black in white

I see a land of peace
Though all I do is fight

I fell the wind on my face
But its nothing but broken glass

I thought it wouldn't take long
But all it does is last

Cursed to walk this evil place
Cursed to bear the weight of the world

I'll take your pain and I'll take your sorrow
And I'll carry it for you until tomorrow

I'll brace myself and I'll speak in your tongue
But just remember I am only one

Chalk lines, drawn by children
Voices from the school yard
Dogs bark, you run
Feet pound pavement hard
Barefoot toes, wind blown hair
Sharp glass on the ground
Careless when I step
Careful not to make a sound
You chase me, like prey
Trying not to trip
I run fast, get away
I must be silent and never slip
Your hands rough around my waist
Cauaught in your trap
Rest your hand on my shoulder
I can't look back
Choking on the tears
My throat constricts
You ask me questions
I merely nod
Pull me away from my safe place
To your home so desolate
I am gone without a trace
I lay in the leaves of this falls birth
Seeing only the red stained leaves
Trying not to panic for all I'm worth
Don't run or hide, stay alive
I can't wait for it to end
What will you do
What will the darkness send
Uncertain future, my demise
A chase after a valued prize
I could see the lies
Beside the evil in your eyes

They the future is bright
But all I see is blurry

I want to know what happens when the curtain lifts
I can stand the suspense so I make a wish

They say the past is behind us
But it seems so fresh to me

I don't understand how some forget so easily
I just want the chance to learn how to be me

Send me away
   Just never say *goodbye

You're so utterly soft
It is a comfort
Like a blanket of snow
On a sleeping village

We bottled up the ashes of our young souls
Put them into the night
For the moon to drink herself happy
The róse of our youth
Oh sweet it is to those who never die

I don’t want you to see me like this
I don’t want to experience it, first hand, either
I cannot change it
I am vulnerable
And it has not bode well for me before

I have peace in my soul
When I lay in the grass and face the sun
Such is the same in my heart
When I look you in the eyes

As I lay in the streams of life
I cannot help but think
In these fluid thoughts I listen
And the water, she tells me such

Patience is a rock
Carried in your hand
You chose for it to be with you
Those who cast the first stone, are fools

Feae she is a breeze
Though she raise the hairs
On the back of your neck
She changes naught in life

Solidarity is such
Whom are you now
And who is with you
Let the stream take me
To fields of fading flowers

My doubts find me in the night
Two and a thirty-nine will make it to the light
Here we lay twixt earth and sky
Here we sleep, here we lie

the air starts to thicken
and my steps start to quicken
not sure where I am running to
as long as its away from you
the lies that haunt my dark dreams
i am tearing at the seams
the ice sliding down my spine
just another defect in a line
when my skies are no longer clear
my vision is clouded by fear
the tears that evaporate by the sun
the pain you replaced and battle you won
i must lie if only to protect you
i have to I'd die if you saw through
i am a piece of distorted glass
something that wasn't made to last
just one shot and I would be erased
but i always forgive you when I look at your face
the lines on my face and waves in the sea
my feet are running I am ready to flee
long and hard strokes of oars
locking all of my doors
one mark higher than the rest
that still doesn't make you the best
when the test is impossible to fail
i am still standing here empty and frail
the call of the wind falls on deaf ears
all I hear is the sound of my fears
the light at the end of the tunnel is gone
and I realize all this time I was wrong
to late to turn or change my mind
i was you looking and you were all I could find
just enough to get my through
ready to plow ahead but looking back to you

my time is measured in cups of love
in stars in the sky and dreams above
my heart is heavier than a paperweight
because what is holds is ornate
my spirit is stretched way to thin
to hide all the secrets within
my soul is on it's vacation
I reiterate as I pull into the station

can you hear me
save me
know me again

do you miss me
love me
make it all right

will you kiss me
love me
find me tonight

will we break it
fake it
find a way to make it

we both sleep alone
on our own
in the dark, apart

I wish you goodnight
tonight
in the twilight

You knew I would never be evil
Never be cruel to you
What you did not know
Is that once you are evil to me
Once you are cruel
I will never allow
You the opportunity to do it again
There is strength in my silence
When I find weakness in your words

It was the first of September
A day to remember
The school yard is broken in
Nails on a chalk board scrape

***** running feet
Slowly answered questions
Marking grades
Cheating mistakes

It was the last of the first
Ready to quench the thirst
Maybe I will learn
Maybe I wont

But I'll walk the path
And drag my feet

Ready or not here I come

I couldn't tell you
What time
I woke up this morning
Sweating, scared
Am I blind
Is a mask
Slipping over my eyes
I don't know
If my heartbeat is fast
Or beating at all
The smell of flesh
Burning underneath my nose

I hum
When I need to calm myself down
Am I panicking now
Where am I
The back of my throat, dry
Skin beneath my eyes, wet

Eyes, sweating
Pores, crying
Breathe into me
Bring me above water

I throw my sheets off
Thinking I'm tangled
In thoughts
Blankets

There is a man
Next to me
Is this a dream too
A barrier
Of bones
A continent
Between me
And the rest of the world
Oceans of confusion
I cannot bridge

I cannot stomach this dream
It bit into me
A cannibal, feasting
Wishing to devour
Eat me up
Drink me down
With a thousand year hunger

I hum
Voice shaking
As much as my hands

I grab the back of your shirt
Afraid of slipping
Back into the dreamscape
I smell burning flesh
Hair
Sins I am not sure
Are my own

Will I attone for them
I hold no ground here
Between chasms
No charm
For serpent tongued liars
No bribe
For master cohorts
Who smile
At the face of death
The face
Of a dear friend

I was younger
Before this dream
Nightmares cost years
I turn my pockets inside out
Nickles and dimes
For Cerberus
Death will make me her *****

Did I make this
In my own head
Questioning sanity
Bring the rod down
On my knuckles
Who will answer
At the stand
Under oath
Skeleton judges
Don't care for lies

I was dreaming
Deep
Sinking deeper
In a black river

Cutting tiger stripes
Into a cat
With burning talons
Searing sins
Into flesh
Instead of feathers
Hair
Instead of candle wicks
Who am I

Humming

I am no bird

Did I do this
Did I watch
How unordained

My body a temple
I a devout sinner
Priests and saints
Baptize me in their water
I find myself no cleaner
Than ashes
Sprinkled
In the wind
An unholy adornment

I hum

Am I deserving of comfort
Do my knees bend
My lips
Remember prayer

I hum
Under the water
It's boiling
Is this hell
Am I evil
Am I wrong
Will I burn

I hum

I am not God

It was with him, he who told me he would die for me
That I fought most of my battles with

Every couple hours I forget how to breathe

I was the aching lanterns in the sky

a telepathic symphony drowning in waves of song

Turn the key
Locking my teeth shut
The only way to keep secrets
Is to **** them

Rushing and cascading
To reach the broken promises

Before you discover my untruth

For I as a poet

Have everything to lose

Tell me you love me
Or do not speak at all

Art was your coffin
It is buried
Shall I leave you as you lay
Or dig you up
For one more colorful day

No velvet ropes
Or ticket takers
Just sunken chests
And heart breakers

I am yours in memory
And I am willfully bound inside
Every kiss that you bestow
Upon the top of my head,
nestled into my hair
On the sides of my face,
and my forehead
Pressed to the back of my hand,
and placed in my heart,
with all of your love

I feel a fool and I do not care
I would taste each day in a bite, as long as it tastes of you
This is a dream and you are my sleep
You give me rest and helpfulness
It swells in my chest
And bubbles out of my mouth
Like a brook swelling in Spring

**** these hands that they would ever let you go
Curse these eyes if they would ever look away
I cling to you like the edge of a cliff
I look to you like the sun on the horizon

Would the birds let me join their song in the quiet of the sun rising in the morning to scatter darkness and dew alike from the skirts of the earth

Would the stars give me but two twinkles, each for an eye so that when I look at you, you can see the lightness of my heart dripping out my eyes

Would the moon bathe me in dreams and fill your head with all the beautiful thoughts of you I hold in my heart

Would you love me for every day that I love you because then we will never run out, like water roaring over the falls to chase the rocks down the stream

I see you in the world, and I hope you can find me in your heart

I wish that I could live in my own house
Where my brother's and sisters live
Where my birth giver and male parental unit call home

A few things stand in my way
The emotional disconnection gives a slight separation
The abusive love and controlling tongues play a part
The creepy old man who touches me in ways no one should

That.

Definitely is a big part.
I mean when you got your Father card did you skim over the fine print where is says protection? Did you forget your glasses so you couldn't see that it said, "must go to a loving home"?
I mean these are all technicalities.

But me?
I'm not. I'm your daughter.
It sounds weird the way it rolls off of my tongue. The metallic after taste, like I've just been slapped. Daughter. Something doesn't seem right.

I mean why have a home where you feel loved, supported and valued. When you can live in a place that devalues all that you are, for all that you stand against.

You've told me
That I always have the right words to say
But I wish I knew
The right things to do
When I feel you falling apart
You heart
That is so big, breaking into millions of pieces that don't just shatter on the floor,
But are stomped on
And crushed into dust that is blown among the aching you have felt for so long

I have given you hugs.
I have held you.
There has never been a time where I could ever want to let you go
Because one embrace can mean everything when your whole world is falling apart
I know we make things 'better' for each other
But I pray to God that one day you will taste the sunshine
That you will have a 'best'
It seems we take one step forward and then just as quickly
We are dragged back by the same hands we thought we had made our way free of
This is life
She is bitter
And sweet
But we could not taste one without the other
sigh

To feel your heart break
Oh, that is one thing
But to watch the world break the heart of an angel
Oh, that is far worse
I wish I could kiss all your pain away
As easily as one wipes a tear
The heart of God grieves for you
Even now as I feel for you
Because everything you are
Even in your abundant brokenness
Is beautiful
And I will love you in all things
And through all things
For are not the stars in the sky
Scars made by the birth of the world
Still we look to them
As if they are the light in the eyes of those we love

Its so dark when I blink
That moment of confusion
When my thoughts are my own
Why is it so scary
To be left by myself
I am a child
So afraid of the dark
Afraid of the hands
The cold and the wind bite like teeth
It is so wild when I am on my own
The sudden mood swings
Where I don't even understand what is happening
The decisions I make are not my own
You cant trust me
Or my bretheren

We are poets
All we know
Is cigarettes and regret

We are poets
We know of heartbreak and all her words
The size of each of her veins
Asking to much of a broken heart

We are poets
We slip into the madness
Because it's more comfortable

We are poets
We observe
Saying nothing
Preferring to write our words

We are poets
And each of our lengths of love
Are our most beautiful works