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Oct 11 · 26
Panic
Lexie Oct 11
I have a four count pulse
South, East, West, North
My head never travels in one direction Thoughts spinning around like the head of an owl
While my heart echos, who?
The quiet is never loud enough
To drown out the sea of thoughts binding themselves together like atoms
They weren't the first one's to bite the fruit
I am to far fallen from the tree
Tree of life, with roots deep enough to dig down to hell
I'm burning a fever of embarrassment
Embers I cannot cool no matter how hard I huff and I puff
In the end the wolf always eats me up
I sit silent, in his stomach, a fetal position of agony
As my sins digest me
Face to face with the inside of monster
I now know has a heart
Red and pumping
I grasp onto organs
Holding out hope for a breath of fresh air
From lungs I have never breathed before
Oct 7 · 36
Hopeless
Lexie Oct 7
Graves have not known
Sleepers like this
Night returns
Older than before
I, no wiser
No kinder
No singer of promises
Promises unmade, unfilled
Cold hands
Clinging to a crypt
Crypt of life
I have shut away
From myself
Bear my eyes no witness
They lead me astray
With no hopes to be seen
For brighter day
Oct 6 · 91
Liquid Courage
Lexie Oct 6
I find new troubles
At the bottom
Of an empty cup
Oct 5 · 56
Leaves of Loriéghnn
Lexie Oct 5
If you wēl not do me ròight
Donnùit do me at all
If you ærn't going to stand
With me
Let me lærn to feíl

Idle are léighm hænds
Not so a füls tóngə
Oct 4 · 60
Vile
Lexie Oct 4
Take me
To my mother's
I will not
Hold my tongue
Your sins
In my veins
She knows
What you have done
Oct 4 · 44
Indifferent
Lexie Oct 4
I am not one
To place my bets
On the end of the world
To put the wages of my toil
Towards the final
Breaking of the dawn
The sun may come up again
Strike no accord against me
And yet, if the darkness remains
I will be no richer, no wiser
Only colder in indifference
That you already see in me
Oct 4 · 260
Whispers
Lexie Oct 4
Turn the key
Locking my teeth shut
The only way to keep secrets
Is to **** them
Lexie Oct 4
Found him, floating
In the river

That's two
Oct 4 · 51
Tears, Splinters
Lexie Oct 4
Scrub the wood
Hard from the floor
As if it was water
Sep 26 · 489
Separated
Lexie Sep 26
Here
But lonely

Is that allowed?
Sep 26 · 70
Specter
Lexie Sep 26
Sitting by the circle of fire
Alone with coals
Ghosts will come soon
To welcome ghouls
Sep 26 · 62
Out of the Ordinary
Lexie Sep 26
Typically, when intoxicated
You call me
Tell me
You love me
That I will be
Your wife

Typically.
Sep 26 · 46
Betrayal
Lexie Sep 26
You made love to her
While your love bites
Were not yet faded
On my skin
Sep 25 · 48
Darker
Lexie Sep 25
Death comes slowly
To those that bait her
Moons rise slowly
In a sky that would taint her
Sep 25 · 191
Sentimental Warmth
Lexie Sep 25
When sad
I bathe
In rays
Of warmth
Pouring through
The window
Sep 13 · 93
Orbit
Lexie Sep 13
Depth of longing
Not unfathomed
To see you again
Stars falling
Faster than before
Watering the sea again
I am no sailor
Of oceans or galaxies
No master of bough
I merely tremble under starlight
To know humility again
Sep 11 · 462
Empty Promises
Lexie Sep 11
Promises last
As long as you make them
Intentions
Of promises being kept
Is a fickle measurement
Sep 11 · 42
Dreamers Often Lie
Lexie Sep 11
This dream
Delivered me to reality
Bore me no joy
Rolling up stardust
Second yarn ball
From the sun
Unwinding reason
Spinning in the dark
When I orbit the sun
The light will touch me again
Sep 3 · 45
End of the World
Lexie Sep 3
Time dripping
Water through
A clenched fist
The hourglass turns
Beginnings, on edge
Born again
Womb of ancients
Turning over
Life in motion
God is born
Nameless
Younger
Not so patient
Death is mute
Old
Patient
Burning
Sep 3 · 67
Lately
Lexie Sep 3
Lately, when asked, how are you?

I roll down my sleeves, hiding scars on my wrist that don't cut as deep as the words you left wringing in my head

Lately, when asked, how are you?

I wonder how quickly your promises dissipated in the mist of time when I no longer lay quiet to your objections

Lately, when asked, how are you?

I hope for you to pick up the phone, ask me yourself, find words for your emotions licking the face of friendship torn apart

I asked you to take a step back, you took two steps forward, three steps back, I dug my heels into the ground I am not moved, I am not deaf, I hold hope in my hands currently waiting for you to ignite coals that have not completely burned out, to breathe life into a husk withering before harvest, to fill a half empty glass with salty tears, to unburden yourself, you need not carry this

Be no martyr, victim, savage or fool
Be grace, be a listening ear
Find me, when I bite my tongue at foolishness, wring my hands of blood not wanting it to drip down your wrists

You shackle your hands, beseeching me for a key you hold under your tongue
I hold no ill will for you, an ounce of heartbreak on a scale you will not let be tipped in either favor
I know of the tears you cry, I feel your heart breaking
I do not know if you will accept comfort from me, accept comfort at all, pity is for fools and I am full of it

My prayers for you are sweet sleep, gentle days, birds singing in your window, wind in your hair, hope in your heart, heart in your hands
I hope these prayers find you, I hope you let them in, I hope you remember, not with tears, I hope you know joy, I hope you ask her to stay even as I have left you, not as far as I will soon be

Lately, when asked, how are you?

I hope you are well
Sorrow not unbidden </3
Aug 30 · 192
Named
Lexie Aug 30
I say your name
A prayer in the dark
The same way
Your mother gave it to you
Whispering it
Into your hair with pride
When you were born
She had heard God
Seed it into her stomach
I say it now with love
For I know no other way
It will carry us to the altar
Aug 20 · 281
Moon
Lexie Aug 20
I am a moon
Poetry is my dark side
Aug 15 · 56
Burning
Lexie Aug 15
In the crypt
Leaning against tombstones
The Devil whispers secrets I told him
Back to me through the marble slab
I was raised in the shadows of the dead
How will I hold the sun
When you no longer stand between us
Skeleton secrets, burying into the earth
The coffin knocks
It will not sound again
They dead are listening
They will rise
It's spooky time *******
Aug 11 · 51
Kindling
Lexie Aug 11
Allow me
To chew
My anger
Up for you
Spit it
Into your mouth

When you finally
Bite into it
It will fill you up
As it has eaten me
From the inside out
For so long

A devouring hole
I am not able to quench
I have hungered, ached
Starved for affection

You call me
To your own table
Refuse to feed me
Shaming me
For my watering mouth
I drip, saliva
You, sweet milk and honey

When I tell you
I have no kindness
Left in me
You stab your knife
Into the table
Carving up
Mahogany inhibitions

And I
Who once stood
Tall, as an oak
Proud as a pine
Begin falling
Earth of roots
Hold me again

A tree falls
In the forest
No one hears it
Did it still fall

The man
With the axe
Is deaf
I am kindling now

Hunger, thirst
Your breadcrumb trails
Bait me
Crumbs of life
Through the hourglass
Digesting your wonderment
All to quickly

Anger is a hot and cold flavor
Slip down smoothly
Only to flood
Into my fingertips
Fists of famine
Devouring
Aug 11 · 260
Innocent
Lexie Aug 11
Plead guilty
For my innocence
When I am mute
I have a bad habit
Of forgetting where I am
Map of skin
Freckle islands sinking
In a pool of sweat
Salty oceans
I have no way to cross
Bridges of arms
Crumbling in uncharted waters
Mast of spine
Scoliosis of will
Tethered ligaments of indifference
Rails made of keratin
Clinging together with
Iceberg cold hands
Tearing apart
A home built
In this cave
A hollow cavern of chest
All that is left
Climbing Incan temple steps
With leviathan limbs
Up the ribcage of my back
A tower with two windows
One doorway in
I have never found a way out
Pulling vines down
Over my ears
I don't want to hear
Music anymore
A trap door tongue
Under the floorboards of my teeth
Lips nailed in submission
Captive, it won't let me out
I have no leverage
Against myself
No femur to pry
Into an iron heart
Veins and arteries wrapping themselves
Around my humourous
Metacarpal judges
Presiding over a court of ligaments
There is no connection
Cartilage sentences, unspecified
How harsh, how long
I tell you
I am innocent
Guilt tears me apart
The gavel falls
Greeting the back of my hand
Bones break
Calcium powder
Mixing with marrow
I am innocent
I am broken
I will heal
Aug 9 · 58
Calvary
Lexie Aug 9
We feel
In the trenches

They say
When in Rome
But I don't think
I could crucify God

Palms nailed
Side lanced
I am not one
To beg forgiveness

Not one
To fall on my knees
Not one
To forgive

Nothing
He would not do for me
Nothing
I would not ask of him

I mourn your death
As a betreyal
When I look down
The hammer
Is in my hand

You blame
The church
For sins of man

Hold accountable
The temple
Not the hands

The alter
For its silence

The tabernacle
For curtains
To thick to unveil
The sins of a saint

A holy of holies
Torn
Two pieces of cloth
One for a funeral shroud
The latter a sail for a ship
To hell's gates

You beg
For anything, nothing
There are no promises
On bleeding ground

A pilgrimage
Of swords
Not confessing
A holy war

My grandmother
Had a different name
Before I was born
She will not die with it

I write about temples
My feet
Will never be clean enough to enter

Sins
I cannot wash off my hands
Heaven's
I pray my children will know
Hell's
I carry
On broken shoulders

I do not want you
To know the weight

Not your burden
To bear
My cross to carry

In the tomb
Of my ancestors
The stone
Rolled away

The kingdom is yours
Aug 8 · 166
Toxic
Lexie Aug 8
Red flags are the asterisk next to your name, footnotes I am to careless to read.
Aug 6 · 222
Chaos
Lexie Aug 6
We **** for chaos
Die for peace
Live to fast
Lies threaded between our teeth
Aug 5 · 71
Misguided, Misled
Lexie Aug 5
I love the world
More than I should
I understand
I am a perfect person

To be used
Used up
Until I am dry
Giving
Until I am spent
Hoping
Until I am hopeless
Hoping
When all is said and done
You are a better man

Let the lights
Burn out
All my fears
All my doubts
Hold me now
Nothing matters anymore

If I ask
You to chose me
There is no choice at all
It has already been made
Made for you

As the sun goes down
It is over
Refusing to fight
I'm no soldier
For broken hearts
No warrior
Of chastity

Go
And be gone
Rubble of our lives
Not worth
Funeral pyres

Wait
Tell me
Tell me you believe
In love
Dreams
That good poeple exists
That you could be one
Let us remember
Vividly
So when we
Ourselves
Are forgotten
Guilt will find us
More easily
Than the hands
You used
To press your love
Into me
Skin broken
As your promises

Such is life
Temptations
Are not my actions
I am human
I love the world
More than I should
Things in it
Not so good for me
Aug 5 · 40
Spacious
Lexie Aug 5
Eyes to see
Ears to hear
No room for fear
Aug 5 · 32
Witchy
Lexie Aug 5
Those above
And those below
Some stay
Some never go
Aug 5 · 70
Depth
Lexie Aug 5
The world will see me
She will not know me
Aug 4 · 169
Ni
Lexie Aug 4
Ni
I tell you it bothers me, mine
Shake my head
Tears in my eyes
Say it's fine
You didn't set boundaries
She crosses the line
You say you love me
I say more
I wonder so much
How we have so little time
Aug 2 · 403
Falling
Lexie Aug 2
Praying for answers
Begging for silence
We thought
Heaven was high
Here we are falling
Jul 31 · 47
Cigar Smoke
Lexie Jul 31
Jazz tip lips
Black and mild lungs
Smoke words
The haze swallows up
Hungry still
Burning now
Light me up
Jul 30 · 99
Cosmo
Lexie Jul 30
I am
The ashes
Of the bridge
Burned
Between the stars
Jul 30 · 186
Control
Lexie Jul 30
body pillow
almost warm
frayed eyes
almost warm
almost melting
into forgiveness
forged as one
unending ridges
tired eyes
swollen in time
frozen emotions
conceived crime
Jul 30 · 84
Crying
Lexie Jul 30
water won't hold
all my sorrow
salty tears
all my grief
Jul 30 · 76
Stupid Maybe
Lexie Jul 30
I die
Every day
To live
With you
Again
Jul 30 · 134
Missing
Lexie Jul 30
I miss you
When I'm happy
And you're not here
Because I want to be
Happy with you

I miss you

I miss you
When I'm sad
And you're not here
Because I want to be
Happy with you

I miss you
L*I*G*H*T*H*E*A*R*T
Jul 26 · 96
Fast
Lexie Jul 26
you said, we are running out of time
makes me wonder
if we ever had any at all
Jul 26 · 50
Hoping for Miracles
Lexie Jul 26
the music stops
when you need it most
singing under your breath
out of tune
hoping for miracles
hoping
for miracles
soon
Jul 26 · 49
Anger (a journey poem)
Lexie Jul 26
I am soft
Anger found me
I let it move on
It is not for me
Beneath me
Hot coals
Under my feet

Anger came again
Liquid in my veins
I let it run
Waterfalls out my eyes
A current away
Not walking with me
Stumbling behind

I found anger
Clenched in my jaw
Settling between knuckles
And metacarpals of my hands
Slammed into the wall
Glass shards on the floor
Let it stay there
Art, reminder
Pity

Anger found me
I spoke to her by name
She seduced me
With the lull of her voice
I lay here now
Barren of grace
Swollen with fury
Fire in my eyes
This is the time
I will burn
Burn out
There will be no rekindling
Only ashes on the walls
Jul 26 · 190
Coals
Lexie Jul 26
he is coals, almost unburning

I, grass, covered in dew

we lay, in the earth

until the sun makes us new
trying a different style, idk
Jul 26 · 64
Washed Away
Lexie Jul 26
We are empty souls
Screaming in the abyss
Do you remember me
Voices thought buried
Dig themselves up
Unearthed again
A haunting
Cheap as ****** in the street
Cobblestone streets
Holding liquor penance
Splicing together
The history of our remnance
Ghosts thinner than walls
Lighting up lanterns
In the street
Moaning
This is the way
Will you follow me
Do you remember me
Am I nothing to you
Only paper towns and matches
Dry kindling to memory
Flames waltzing
To tunes older than love
Ivory keys remember
Being elephants
When they were younger
And the world
Not so at sorts
Children in the street
Recognizing more tongues
Than their own
Witches singing in an alley
Do you know me
When I held you on my knee
Do you remember
Spells whispered into water
Washing away sorrow
Sins
And memory
Jul 24 · 91
Simplicity
Lexie Jul 24
There is complexity in all things
We are so utterly simple
Jul 24 · 46
Daydreaming
Lexie Jul 24
I am nimbled fingered
Braiding flowers
In the devils hair
If he wants
To know my secrets
I will whisper
Them into his ears myself
About how susan
Got her black eye
Queen Anne
Tore her lace
When the summer lighting
Thundered down
How much golden rods
Are really worth
I am a wild flower
Spinning in fields
Winding vines around your leg
Until I crumble to Adam and Eve dust
In a primrose casket
We love
With fingers crossed
Behind our backs
Jul 24 · 189
Slipping out of God Mode
Lexie Jul 24
I couldn't tell you
What time
I woke up this morning
Sweating, scared
Am I blind
Is a mask
Slipping over my eyes
I don't know
If my heartbeat is fast
Or beating at all
The smell of flesh
Burning underneath my nose

I hum
When I need to calm myself down
Am I panicking now
Where am I
The back of my throat, dry
Skin beneath my eyes, wet

Eyes, sweating
Pores, crying
Breathe into me
Bring me above water

I throw my sheets off
Thinking I'm tangled
In thoughts
Blankets

There is a man
Next to me
Is this a dream too
A barrier
Of bones
A continent
Between me
And the rest of the world
Oceans of confusion
I cannot bridge

I cannot stomach this dream
It bit into me
A cannibal, feasting
Wishing to devour
Eat me up
Drink me down
With a thousand year hunger

I hum
Voice shaking
As much as my hands

I grab the back of your shirt
Afraid of slipping
Back into the dreamscape
I smell burning flesh
Hair
Sins I am not sure
Are my own

Will I attone for them
I hold no ground here
Between chasms
No charm
For serpent tongued liars
No bribe
For master cohorts
Who smile
At the face of death
The face
Of a dear friend

I was younger
Before this dream
Nightmares cost years
I turn my pockets inside out
Nickles and dimes
For Cerberus
Death will make me her *****

Did I make this
In my own head
Questioning sanity
Bring the rod down
On my knuckles
Who will answer
At the stand
Under oath
Skeleton judges
Don't care for lies

I was dreaming
Deep
Sinking deeper
In a black river

Cutting tiger stripes
Into a cat
With burning talons
Searing sins
Into flesh
Instead of feathers
Hair
Instead of candle wicks
Who am I

Humming

I am no bird

Did I do this
Did I watch
How unordained

My body a temple
I a devout sinner
Priests and saints
Baptize me in their water
I find myself no cleaner
Than ashes
Sprinkled
In the wind
An unholy adornment

I hum

Am I deserving of comfort
Do my knees bend
My lips
Remember prayer

I hum
Under the water
It's boiling
Is this hell
Am I evil
Am I wrong
Will I burn

I hum

I am not God
All I can say is I had the weirdest ******* dream.
Jul 24 · 126
On the Bridge
Lexie Jul 24
Fear will always be with you
Don't hold his hand
If he doesn't jump first
Push him.
Jul 24 · 152
Questions
Lexie Jul 24
"Do you ever dream in Spanish?"

"Only on Friday."
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