I recently have noticed
how sick I look on you
everytime you post a pic
or share a moment

I look sick following you
Everytime that you try
to make your life apart
I look sick when I follow you
not through dark alleys
but on twitter, facebook
or instagram

I am not used to write
odd modern poetry
but you deserve a reason
to why I started
unfollowing you

So, everytime you upload
a last-night-party pic
I want you to know I won't be there
looking for every guy you were
hanging around with

Because lately I've noticed
that I look sick not for following you
                                            exactly
but for being aware
of what you were doing

I'm sick of being a post
instead of being a memory
I'm sick of social media
and their way of twisting things

Making us more a number or dates
instead of making us "friends"
(who says that you can't be friend with your ex?
maybe ancient rules, maybe an idiot
with post-traumatic-relationship-stress)

I'm sick of "follows", "tweets", "likes"
ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends

I'm unfollowing you for my health
I'm unfollowing the entire world 'cause
constantly they remind me to you
with all their fake friends and ***** guys
and ***** girls; ******* attention that
maybe they don't truely deserve

Yeah, probably I should unfollow the world
                                                     for my health

Following the unfollowed
to follow fellow folks, felons
as I, guilty for spending life
hunting followers who may scent
flourishing fables made of fabric
filled with formidable potential.

Zestfully fleeing mafficking faces
futzing in mass lobotomy, quaffing
media fraudulent sloppiness,
fallacy of a system fearing freedom
of free thinkers unchained,
through fault of failing legacies,

Left behind by phantom slaves
and modern enslavers, as confluxes
of frantic consciousness abandon
the flow to fly high the abysses
of the unfathomable unfazed
by the fuzzy foozles of those defusing,

The fragility and clumsiness of jiffy
flickering governors baffling
enlightenment and solidarity, blocking
the path of the unfollowing where flesh
is bygone for fleeting feelings to enflame
future fundamentals,

Essentially shared,
by an evolving united and mirific
mystifying humankind.

here i sit unfollowing people
i've never met on instagram
(all those expections i put on
myself i can never meet)

here i sit removing old photos
from my iphone gallery
(all those memories i cant
seem to give it up)

here i thought to myself
its time to stop hoarding
its time to stop dwelling in the past
that can never be brought back
its time to be living, now

cheers to a new beginning
a new season in life
cheers to setting lower expectations
for myself and for Him to meet
cheers to being kind to myself

today

i shouldn’t cry over you they say, you’ve got no reason to, he didn’t hurt you.

but i cry over the nights i lie awake while my heart yearns for that feeling and my mind gives me all the reasons as to why i am not good enough to be alive and why you left

i cry for my sanity and how it has been lost because of the way you left me, untraceable, undetectable, without reason

i cry because i can still feel your touch on my body and it has felt me feeling ice cold for weeks on end

i cry at the haunting of your laugh ringing in my head and the sound of you voice when you said you loved me

i cry at the backlash i got and how everyone thinks it’s so easy to just move on, block his number, get rid of him

but it’s not that easy you see, i cry because as much as i want you to not be apart of me, blocking a number won’t block you from my head, unfollowing you won’t make the sounds of your voice and everything you ever said and the essence of you stop following me, trying to see in others what i saw in you won’t erase these feelings of irreplaceablity i gave to you.

i cry because as much as i want to be, i’m still not over you, and i cry because even after all of this, i still don’t hate you.

From the very beginning that I met you
I knew you had a spark.
Those eyes shone so bright in the sunshine of hope,
and a river of compassion flew in your heart!

I could hear a tale so new
Which would rise and shine like a lark.
Dreams to catch, you tied yourself up with a rope,
While sketching and painting your modern art!!


The canvas filled up with colors
a mix of red, yellow, blue and pink.
You missed a spot, all of a sudden, it seemed
a small white patch lay so much unseen!

White made the canvas look duller
thought so, you picked up your ink.
Let me write my own story, is all you deemed,
of my success and failures as they make me this being!


Wrote thy story of all the joy and glee
with a touch of sadness, hurt and anger.
The canvas looked empty still
for all your dreams were yet to be seen as true!

Dreams of exploring this world just like a bee,
of devouring the taste of varied dishes without hunger.
I shall knit the dreams on my canvas, ah! such a strong will,
I want to walk far, he noted, so may I have you??


From the beginning till the end,
from being a dreamer till a believer.
You, taking along me, planned on moving mountains
staying underneath the beautiful sky.

Unfollowing the usual trend,
Trusting on your instincts that aren't deceiver.
All the happy chirping birds were your muse, you had exclaimed by the fountain,
cause all along the way, you knew, we had to fly!!

I hate you with a venom in moments
Though I never really knew you
You were always willing
To take more than I could stand
I know I interrupted
The complacency you wanted to think
You had.

I dreamed in the midst of a pinky purple haze
Almost blue
Stardust
That I wouldn't be able to fully see
Until I wrote to you.

I remember nothing else
Except for the opening greeting.

I think that you are weak
Young
Immature
Impressionable
Naive
Stupid even
Honestly.

It's not like me
To feel venom towards another wom--girl.
But with you
You showed up with nothing but armor on
You did nothing but turn the other way
You were so caught up in trying to win
A battle that just never could have been won
That you blocked, ignored, hid
Pretended
I didn't exist.

You know you were gone for a moment there
And it was all about me
He thought he should leave me because of what happened with you
So I hope that in your fear
In your stupidity
In your lack of maturity
I hope that you can see
Deep down in there
And I say this to myself even too,
That it was always him.

It was also him Sarô that didn't want either of us
Not really.

It wasn't really about us though
It's about him.
As women, it's so hard
Not to get caught up in feeling
Thrown away
Not chosen
Not enough
But that's not really what happened here
And as time continues on
I hope you both can see
Straight on
That though the dust in moments
Appears to be more clear
It's not
Not between you
Not for him.

He's a lost one
I painted portraits with my words
Wanting him to see the jeweled light
I stunned him into silence
Because I think his shadow
Frightened him so much
And it's hard for me
To think that you might have opened your arms
I hope you are braver, stronger, wiser.

It's about him.
It's about his inability to love
His lack of empathy
His well has run so dry
Although I don't know that it was ever full.

All I wanted was to tell you
To whisper in your ear
I don't think you and I will ever be friends
But when it's me on that stage
With him
If you dare come and duck when I'm nearby
Or try to make yourself known..

I hope you realize little girl
That you are wasting your time

We both did.

There were things learned
Lessons gained
But no amount of unfollowing and refollowing
Someone on the internet

Will make him ever love you
Or himself.

Hiding behind screens,
crying to sleep.
Cool on instagram,
fool in reality.
This is what our generation is ?
Social media is everything,
so doing anything for likes and views,
from the people we don't even know, existed before this.
Connecting with people from different corners of the world,
but not making an effort to talk to the person sitting next to us.
What's the point of living in the same house ?
when we can just see each other's status on facebook ?
Swearing, bullying, blackmailing and hacking people online,
but being nice and acting all fine, in reality.
Blocking and unfollowing people we don't like,
deleting their pictures from our device.
But how do we block the memories ?
The moments we've spend with them,
how to clear this data from our minds ?
Faking **,
and living a lie.
Just pretending to be alright,
as no one really have the courage to get self-loathed,
by accepting the truth.
But what about self-discovery ?