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Martin Narrod Feb 2014
The Checkout Line

I wish to speak with you
ten years from now, you'll be ten years behind.

The words and meanings you carry in your pants, the pick-pocket steals your hopes from time.
and the visions of empty trash receptacles
with their late evening drunken lovers' bouts, at restless end tables. And the bums with their ******* attitudes **** covered clothes, and soiled minds

the clarity of the curbside drunk, picking up shades of filtered cigarettes of twilight scandalous
pickup lovers in their evening best.

And to talk with you ten years from now, you'll be ten years behind.

They're Green Beret head ornaments
detailing the porcelain platforms of Delft
Lining up for one last line to carry them into another faded sunrise at dawn's forgotten memory of yester night
and they walk their gallows holding pride fully their flags of exalted countrymen.

The republic of teacups of literary proficiency.
Wearing the necklaces of paid tolls to an afterlife they find in the miniscule car crashes of engagement with a grinless driving mate in a neighboring car in its pass into the forethought of turned corners.
Where they befell the great disappointment of failure in the frosted eyes of their fathers' expectations.

Who carried the shame of their mother's incessant discontent through short skirts, and high heels.

Who disapproved of the **** whom wore the sneak-out-of-the-house-wear clothing line, and traveled by night over turbulent asphalt by way of sidecar through turn and turnabout hand-over-hand contracts of lover's affection, and slept in tall grasses of wet nightfall with views of San Francisco, and were trapped in the inescapable Alcatraz and Statesville of unconsenting parents and their curfews,

through trials and trails of Skittles leading to after school Doctor visits in the basement of a doting mother, whilst she sits quietly in her exclusive quilting parties with noble equities of partners in knowledge, listening to Edith Piaf and the like,

All the while condemned to time, trapped in the second hand, hand me downs of the 21st century, decades of decadent introverts with their table top unread notebooks, and old forgotten score cards, and the numbers of scholars of years past,

and to talk with you ten years from now will be my greatest pleasure, for you will be....ten year's behind.


They push the sterile elevator buttons, and descend upon the floor of scents flourishing from their crowded family rooms, only aware of distinctive flavors, in their middle eastern shades of desert gumbo,

Who speak ribbit and alfalfa until midnight of the afternoon, sharing fables of slaughtered giraffes and camels that walked from Kiev to Baghdad in a fortnight,

Who are aware the power is out, but continue to scour for candles in a dark room where candles once burned, where candle wax seals the drawers of where candles can be found. Where once sat gluttonous kings and queens in Sunday attire waiting for words of freedom from the North.

of Florence, Sochi,Shanghai
of Dempster, Foster, Lincoln
of Dodge, Ford, Shelby

Of concrete fortune tellers in 2nd story tenement blocks with hairy legs, and head lice, wearing beautiful sachets of India speaking ribbit and alfalfa.

On their unbirthdays they walk the fish tanks wearing their birthday suits to remind them who serves the food on the floors of the family room fish mongers tactics.

The old men wear gargoyles on their shoulders.

Lo! Fear has crept the glass marbles of their wisdom and fortune, blearing rocket ships and kazoos on the sidewalks of their Portuguese forefathers.

Where ancestry burns cigarette holes in the short-haired blue carpet, where Hoover breaks flood waters of insignificance across hard headed Evangelical trinities.

Who share construction techniques one early morning at four, where questions of Hammer and **** build intelligence in secondary faces of nameless twilight lovers, who possess bear blankets, and upheavals, finely wired bushes of ***** maturity. Eating *** and check, tongue and pen.

Where police caress emergency flame retardants over the fire between their legs, wielding the chauvinistic blade of comfort in the backseat of a Yellow faced driving patron.

With their innocent daughters with their nubile thighs, and malleable personalities, which require elite words and jewelry. Wearing wheat buns, Longfellow, and squire.

Holding postmarked cellular structure within their mobile anguish.

Who go curling in their showers, pushing afternoon naps and pretentious frou-frou hats over tainted friendships with their girlfriend's brothers with minimum paychecks'.

Through their narcissus and narcosis, their mirrored perceptions of medicinal scripture of Methamphetamine and elegant five-star meat.

Who amend their words with constitutional forgiveness, in their fascist cloth rampages through groves of learning strategies. And the closets, cupboards, and coins
with rubber hearts, steel *****, and gold *****,

Tall-tales of sock puppet hands with friendly sharing ******* techniques, dry with envy, colorful scabs, and coagulation of eccentric ****** endeavors, With their social lubricants and their tile feet wardrobes with B-quality Adidas and Reeboks gods of the souls of us. Who possess piceous syndromes of Ouiji boards in their parent’s basements.

When will fire burn another Bush? Spread the fire walls of Chicago, and part grocery store fields of food. Wrapping towels under the doors of smoke filled lungs, on the fingernails of a sleepover between business executives with the neoprene finish of their sons and daughters who attend finishing school, with resumes of oak furnishings,

And I long to talk with you ten years from now,
For you'll be talking ten years behind.

Who profligate their padded inventories breaking Mohammed and Hearst,
laying the pillows of cirrus minor
waiting for the rain to paint the eyes of the scriptures which waft through concrete corridors,
and scent the air with their exalted personas,

With the different channels of confusions, watching dimple past freckle, eating the palms of our tropical mental vocations to achieve purity from the indignation of those whom are contemptuous for lack of innocence in America,
this America, of lack of peace,
of America hold me,
Let me be.

Whom read the letters off music, blearing Sinatra and Krall, Manson where is your contempt?

Manson where is your manipulation of place settings?, you deserve fork and knife, the wounded commandments that regretfully fall like timber in an abandoned sanctuary of Yellowstone,
Manson, with your claws of the heart.
Manson, with your sheik vulgarity of **** cloaks exposing your ladies undercarriage,

Those who take their pets to walk the aisles of famished eyes,
allowing the dorsals of their backsides to wonder aimlessly through Vietnam and Chinaman,
holding peace of mind aware of their chemical leashes and fifteen calorie mental meals, holding hands, unaware of repercussion,

With their vivid recollections of sprinkler and slide, through dew and beyond,
Holding citrus drinks to themselves, apart from pleasure, trapped with excite from sunsets, and in-between.

Withholding reservation of tongue to lung.
Flowing ribbit and alfalfa, in the corridors of expected fragrance.

and to speak with you of ten years from now, will be a pleasure all my own, for you will be talking ten years behind.

They walked outside climbing over mountains of shrapnel, popped collars
and endless buffets of emotion,
driving Claremont all the way to art gallery premiers
and forever waited for plane crash landings
and the phone calls that never came

Glowing black and white cameras
giving modelesque perceptions to all-you-can-eat eyes
giving cigarettes endless chasms of light

Colored pavement trenches and divots
cliff note alibis
and surgery that lasted until the seamstress had gone into an
endless rest
and
empty cupboards

Classic stools painted with sleepless white smoke and bleached canvas rolling tobacco with the stained yellow window panes of feral tapestry and overindulgent vernacular

Like a satiated cheeseburger weeping smile simple emotion
on November the 18th celebrations
and Wisconsin out of business sales

Too much comfort, stealing switchboards from the the elderly, constantly putting gibberish into
effortless conversation.

Dormant doormats, with the greetings that never
reached as far as coffee table favelas,
arriving to homes of famished
furniture, awaiting temperate lifestyles and the window sill arguments from pedantic literacy

Silver shillings and corporate discovery clogged the persuasive
push and shove
to and from

Killing enterprise
loquacious attempt at too soon
much too soon
too soon for forever

Wall to wall post-card collages
happy reminders of the places never visited by drinks in the hands of
those received

Registered to the clouded skies of clip board artists
this arthritis of envy
of bathtub old age
wrinkled matted faces
logged with quick-fixes, anemia, and heart-break

disposed of off the streets
of youth, wheeling and wailing
rolling down striped stairs
of shock and arraignment
holding the hand rails of a wheelchair
suitcase
packed away in a life

Down I-37
into the ochre autumn fallen down leaves
and left memories behind
their green Syphilis eyeglasses

weeping tumuli
recalcitrant
mulish, furrow of beast and beyond

yelling, screaming, howling
at the prurient puerile tilling
of sheets

****** the voices of words
and vomiting the mind into the pockets of the turbulent perambulations
expelled from meat-packing
whispering condescension
and coercing adolescent obsessions
with fame, glamour, and *****

Creeping out into the naked
light of the Darger scale janitorial
closets, carrying the notorious gowns
of red wine spells, backpacks, and pins

henchmen, plaintiff, and youth

All the while
ripping at the incantations of the soul
whispering ribbit and alfalfa
in the guard-rail scars
of the dawns decadent forgotten
Angela Dawn Jun 2014
We are the coffee stains on waiting tables
That lie unattended in cafes
Of our own making
We are the imprints
Of a life lived haphazardly
Without any patterns to follow
We are…and are nothing more

Each day I immerse myself
In the torrent of a New York Sidewalk
Knowing that  Life and death
Have never been closer
Than at this very moment
Each day I see people
Living lives of quiet desperation
Caged in suits of blue and black
Bought for 250 dollars
At  Saks fifth avenue
Without looking at price tags
Because who argues
About the price of a straitjacket

I leave the crowds and walk down further
On a street that seems empty and yet full
There is a tree standing at the corner
Of two numbered avenues that
Are different ,yet the same
In the nightmarish way
That only cities can hope to achieve
It looks anaemic and withdrawn
Gnarled beyond recognition
Unnoticed , except by dogs
And posters for lost dogs
That offer paper rewards
For a live beating heart
It seems to cry, tearlessly
Soundlessly
At each nail that tears through its skin
Trying to find its pulse point
And silence it for good

There are brownstones lining
The street that I turn into
Brick mansions that should
In their ridges hold
Stories of wealth and  joy
That surely follow
All green paper trails
But instead, house
(Like exotic museum specimens )
Cheating fathers and acrimonious mothers
Drugged out sons and prostitutional daughters
All by products of a generation that measures
***** into its morning cornflakes
And keeps itself alive
On a steady diet of Adderall


I come to the end of the street
And watch as the sun sinks down
Over a dead end world
Wondering if the night will hide
Or reveal all that lies hidden
Wondering if remembering
Buries or resurrects …
Or whether we are all graves
Postmarked optimistically “To Heaven “
Spectrous aberrations of youth
Surround him, embrace him
Leaving him disoriented, dismayed
Amidst sultry belongings
He’s tethered to that pole of vicissitude
Draped by disfavor
Postmarked Valhalla
Addressed to Folkvangr
Teased by irreverent lovers
In pursuit of contentment
His chronicles restart
In an unpublished testament
Bound by leather, cows unfettered
One lifeless body stationary
Crimson streams part chalk-dry lips
As love’s guillotined victim drips
His future’s fortune forsaken
Willingness to triumph in battle
Leaks from this dimension
With each fluxing discharge
Of her stream’s outgoing apathy
And his fluid permeates alluvium
In streambeds near life’s summit
Nat Lipstadt Dec 2013
"Ben-Oni" is a Hebrew term meaning "son (Ben) of sorrow (oni)," and the name of an 1825 manuscript describing a chess opening.

"Whenever I felt in a sorrowful mood and wanted to take refuge from melancholy, I sat over a chessboard, for one or two hours according to circumstances. Thus this book came into being, and its name, Ben-Oni, 'Son of Sadness,' should indicate its origin." - Aaron Reinganum.  

From  the Old Testament,
Genesis 35:18;

“Her dying lips calls
her newborn son Ben-Oni,
the son of my sorrow.
But Jacob, because he would not
renew the sorrowful remembrance of his
mother's death every time
he called his son by name,
changed his name,
and called him Benjamin,
the son of my right hand."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ben-Oni, Son of Sorrow

Love,
you can fall in
and out of.

Happy,
comes and goes,
in waves,
cycles of differing amplitudes.

Its schedule of
arrivals and departures,
most erratic.

It is always
a two sided affair,
don't blame this messenger,
it's the way of the world
that it comes,
then it goes

Tho certain sorrows,
special, may
wax and wane,
they, a once, then a forever guest,
a full time resident,
taste, once acquired,
cannot be erased.

Part of your museum's
permanent collection,
an addiction affliction
that can't be undone,
be beat back,
ain't no emotional methadone,
to inhibit its delicious lows

Like a passerby,
a mound of stones espied,^
a grave marker au naturel,
compelled and compulsed,
duty bound to add a stone
to keep the pile intact and sound,
another 'sorrow' poem to add
to the internet's dustbin.

Sorrow,
a rich, old moneyed patron,
with a wealth of ancient lineage
orders and commands
yet another a poem
to celebrate its entrenchment
in our constitution personal

Son of Sorrow,
Son, Sorrow,
two conditions,
one necessary and
one sufficient,
combined,
a logical causality,
or a casus belli.  

If you spoke Hebrew,
understood you would
the quality of the sound of
Oni.

It is a soundless sigh,
a virulent scream, part wail,
part exclamation, part groan,
say it slow - oh nee.

You alone,
a father,
can own,
the sorrow of a son,
who denies you.

It cannot be denied,
expiated, signed away,
a syllable of grief
that says mine, all mine.

Watching the sun push away
the backdrop,
the stage curtain of the randomized
but they a-keep-on-coming,
summer thunderstorms
that have scattered
all living creatures
to the comforts,
the shelter
of loved ones,
but yours, present, or not,
return your message
either marked "well received'
or sadly, postmarked
"addressee unknown, get lost."

Curse me to stop,
and I can't,
already accursed,
add your curse to my collection,
makes no difference to my pile,
of sorrowfully fresh recollections

We slept together,
so many good night moon
stories read,
pillows shared,
side by side,
a stock exchange of
kisses and hugs,
trades that can't be cancelled,
having been entered officially
on the books and records of
our-sorrowful hearts.

Lesser men
cry to themselves,
their loneliness, their tragedy
a soliloquy, revealed in a
one man show,
Off Brodway,
before an audience of none.  

Not me kid, my oni,
is a public theater
of a visible shriek  
in every breathe,
but the Supreme Court
gone and ruled against me,
and now there is no possibility
of injunctive relief.

Will travel to faraway lands,
asking different courts
for a hearing, knowing full well,
that I will be plea-denied,
having no standing,
for here,
there and everywhere
I lack proofs
and my son-accuser
wears masks and presents
no charges,
and even if he did,
I would gladly confess,
if he but presented them
face to face.  

Son of Sorrow,
Son, Sorrow,
two conditions,
one necessary and
one sufficient,
combined,
a logical causality,
or a casus belli.

Come let us exchange
new names, new poems,
for we, though both poets,
do not read each other's
Works.


It is time.
I have a first born son who I rarely see and only, very, very occasionally hear from, and then it is by email or text.  I do not judge for he is the product of my *****, and who cannot wonder if...

^a Jewish custom is to place a small stone on the tombstone you are visiting at a cemetery. The custom, ancient, is derived from when a mound of stones would be a marker of a burial.  It became customary for a passerby to add a stone to the mound to perpetuate its existence.
robin Apr 2013
is it winter where you are?
no snow
or blizzards, just
chill fog
and frost.
the winter of a city
that gave up long ago.
--------------------------------
winter seems to follow you.
damp grey mornings
skulking at your feet like a beaten dog.
whimpering in mist
and growling in
weak thunderstorms
that can't quite wash away the clouds.
kick december in the ribs
because you know it will always come back
to sleep at your feet.
winter seems to follow you
but
i could be wrong.
--------------------------
i know all about stormchasers
but you're so much
sadder
than that
[pathetic like a beaten dog]
not chasing death
or danger
just defeatism.
chasing defeat and hopelessness
and grass-made-glass
by the frost of the night before.
---------------------
is it winter where you are?
is december shivering at your door?
in my room it is fall,
and all the rotting leaves
remind me of you.
------------------------
is it winter where you are?
you've evaded the summer all your life
hot air
and sun
killing the clouds.
the indian summer will catch up with you
and september
will melt you
through.
pathetic puddle of defeatism.
aggregated mist
and fog
like a beaten dog,
sinking into the deepest blues
and grays
but oh
you were always
the patron saint of denial.
------------------------------
rip me apart like the letters you never sent
postmarked 'tomorrow, tomorrow'-
but tomorrow never came.
[it's hard to tell dawn from dusk
when the sky is always
gray.]
runaway notes from a foreign season.
rip me apart and i won't think of you anymore.
rip me apart
and all your apologies,
condolences
and accusations
will be scraps of paper under dry leaves.
-----------------------------------
i'm tired of following my dreams
when they just lead me off the cliffs.

you follow winter into the sea
and drown a whimpering dog.
raingirlpoet Sep 2014
“I need to write a poem”
Were the first words out of my mouth when my mother told me about
The Letters

One letter arrived one day, postmarked July 1st, 2014
I don’t know when it arrived, but that day
I guess that day her soul earned it’s wings
That day, that one day
My soul crumbled as hers rose to the heavens, with that piece of paper
that had Apology scrawled all over it in that handwriting of hers that
Didn’t change one bit

I was watching my family extra closely as my mother read the letter out loud
I didn’t want to see any of us hurt anymore even though I knew in my heart
We would get through this
We’re Zelinskis, strong and forgiving
We open our hearts to perfect strangers and welcome them into our home with hugs and laughter and game nights that don’t end at midnight
We are one in suffering and one in rejoicing
We wear the teachings of the bible on our shirtsleeves and kindness drip drops from our eyes
My dad says
We’re all children of christ

But Children still get hurt
My sister, she chose Laughter
My brother, his face was a blank canvas as I rubbed and rubbed, trying to see through the white blanket of paint that masked his emotions
My sister in law told me the Truth
My brother, I don’t know, I just hope he listens to his heart this time
My sister, she has a wedding to plan
Me,
Maybe I’m the only one who wanted to be angry
Maybe I’m the only one who sees their pain even though they can’t
Or maybe I’m delusional and no one’s really affected by the Letter

We’re still children
I’m still bouncing around the house, following the older kids around like a lost puppy
My sisters are still my heroes and my brothers
Are still my knights, my Protectors, the ones I could sass and make fun of because they
Did the same to me but with much more force than my small voice could carry
We’re still children
I know nothing of The Letters
Instead, I’m welcoming Her into our home again with a tray full of Grandma’s famous chocolate chip cookies and the goofy grin of a six year old
I’m meeting Her eyes again
Only this time
I know she’ll leave
This time, I know how much time I have

So I’ll write my letter now
And instead of remorse and anger
I’ll fill it with good times and Remember Whens
I’ll put it in the mailbox, swipe the red flag up
And wish on the mailman that you’ll get it
Jack Piatt Aug 2012
She’s swinging from a different home plate
Our dictionaries don’t have enough words for her
She needs more
But not from here
Cause she’s not from here
She’s from everywhere we’re not
And when she writes
We are well aware of it
She spears me through the heart with her lines
But the last word never fails to politely cauterize
So her poetry leaves a mark
Fascia tattoos from Planet M
Messages sinking deeper in
Underneath everything human
Into the soul’s skin

That’s the reach of her pen
(Down below the circus of our understanding)

She lives down there, and sends postcards up
In the form of poetry

Dear so and so,
“there is a hole in your belly.

this is where those precious things fall that you drop”

Dear Mariah,
I know, I know
But I can’t seem to keep my hands dry

Knowing she will just sigh
And keep writing her poetry post cards
Postmarked “upstairs”

As the circus bustles and bangs above
I am sure she takes breaks
And comes up
For cotton candy
(blue/orange - yellow/purple)
of course
This is written for mariah, who you can find right here on hello poetry at ...
http://hellopoetry.com/-mariah/
Check her out and you will see what I mean :)
Nat Lipstadt Sep 2015
your poem read,
awoken by lightening flashes of
morning notifications arriving,
postmarked from
"I liked it"

but it does not
end there,
continues,
to a new ending

who and why,
who and why,
did this one find
their own
worthy in it
that was writ unknowingly
just for them

and
you look them up,
guessing
who and why,
rereading your hand's work,
which verse was it,
was it for a blessing or a
curse,
that touched them,
that made them
touch
you

each "like,"
a work in itself

re examined,
re searched,
re imagined
in the
light of
who they are
and
why they are
liking words I wrote

a single poem
bring hours of imagination,
each "like"
individually gift wrapped,
each human liking rapt,
each imagine a rapture,

each "like"
a new poem
about the who and why
each name a disguise to unravel,
each name a title
of a new different,
imagined poem,
who and why,
we
like
each other

~~~
6:53am
You have become like the specter of my youth
A knothole seeping deadly fumes
Surrounding me, embracing me
Leaving me intoxicated and defeated
In a pile of filthy belongings
Tethered to this pole of existence
Wrapped in disregard
Postmarked for the gates of Valhalla
Addressed to sirens of the flat rivers
And dropped at the feet of irreverent lovers
You are my memory and the end of all complacency
The beginning of a new chapter
In a volume to be published
Bound in leather
Taken from cows raised in pastures
Decapitated and sawed open
Removing vital organs from lifeless bodies
Supported by a hook
From which brain chemicals drip
And neurons fire
Through a convict with his blindfold on
Moist cigarette, dangling off his lips
Air breathed by love’s guillotined victim
Rattlesnake’s discarded skin
You take from me coconut’s milk
Fuel for foddering the future
And willingness to triumph in battle
I leave your kingdom
Hopeful for patronage
Seeking refuge, perchance amongst palms
Floating on what seems a sliver
In your filthy sea’s apathy
I bide my time, until delivered
Until my tawny encasings unravel
This was the draft for "Confinement." It may be better than what I reduced it to.


Feb.
MMX
Ronald J Chapman Feb 2016
Knock on the door.
Who is it? I ask.
Special delivery!

I open the door.
I'm handed aa envelope postmarked Seoul Korea.
Sign here, please.

I walk over to the desk and open the envelope.
Inside the envelope is a letter along with a round trip plane ticket to Seoul Korea.

The letter says, "Congratulations you are the grand prize winner of "Why Korea is a Beautiful Country?" contest. Thank you for submitting several of your poems to us. Now get ready to take some pictures of your dream.

A month later April 1st

I find myself boarding the plane flight to Korea.
We take off, and I decide to try and sleep for the entire flight.

But I'm woken up by people screaming. Then hear a voice over the loudspeaker saying, "Put your life vest on, fasten your seat belts."
The flight attendants were running down the aisles yelling.

I see a bright flash as bright as a noon sun,

Waking up on a sandy white beach,
To the sound of ocean waves.
Feeling ocean waves at my feet trying to pull me back into the sea.

Standing up wiping the sand off my pants.
Looking around,
I see an empty beach, a deep blue ocean, trees and mountains.

Seabirds flying high as if searching for something,

Suddenly I hear yelling in a strange language from behind me. Turning around, I see bizarre looking people riding horses ******* towards me with swords raised screaming what sounded like "Mooreup Ggul-eo! Mooreup Ggul-eo!  I tried to run but was grabbed by one of them and pushed to the ground. Because of being scared of having my head cut off. I didn't say a word or move a muscle.  

Next I was bound, gagged and tied to a horse with a rope.

The men mounted their horses. They began moving down the beach while dragging me behind the last horse.

After what seemed like many hours of walking and with the sun setting we reached a grotto surrounded by cherry blossoms, roses and pine trees. Stunning like something from a fairytale.

One of the men removed the gag and untied me.
He grabbed me by the arm yelling something at me that I couldn't understand while pointing at and pushing me into a small cave.
When I turned to look around, I noticed the rest of the group were all bowing, and some even seemed to be crying. I was grabbed again turned around and tossed into the cave.

Then I hear a sound like a sad young woman crying.
I say, "Hello." No answer.

I continue walking toward the crying in this cave as dark as moonless night. When I come to an open chamber as bright as the midnight sun.
I'm shocked to see a beautiful Goddess tied to a throne by her wrists and neck.

I quickly begin to untie her. I try to speak to her. But neither of us can understand the other. But I remembered the most important word in the Korean language and say,  "saranghamnida" She stops crying looks directly at me and says, "jagiya saranghae."

After I released her from the prison of, her thrown. She jumped up
and put her arms around me and with her head against my chest listening to my heart. She kept hugging me. She wouldn't let go of me.

She takes my hand pulls me slowly towards the cave opening.
I tried to stop her because of the people waiting outside guarding the cave but insisted she seemed triumphant and not afraid.

As we stepped out of the cave to a beautiful red-orange sunset.
She bows to me, and I return the bow and we both bow to the people guarding the cave. All of a sudden, the crowd cheers yelling Dongroe! Dongroe!...

I fell in love with the incredible Goddess Yuhwa. Last night I dreamed that she was bathing in my steamy cup of tea. That took the chill in my Soul away.

Copyright © 2016 Ronald J Chapman All Rights Reserved.

Mooreup Ggul-eo! = On your knees!
saranghamnida The Most formal way to say I love you.

jagiya saranghae = Darling, I love you.

Dongroe  A ceremony in which the king and queen bow to each other, share wine and food, and have their first night together.
These words came from a dream I had on Sunday night February 21, 2016.
meadowbrook Dec 2021
I forget, I forget,
that we share the same world,
that we’re in the same realm,
because all of your letters
are postmarked from hell

And to think these precious lives around us
breathe your air,
and have smelled your cigarette skin,
and are your next of kin -

oh, what a comical life we live in
This suicide taste funny,
with its imprint eternally
stamped
in my head.
It has the taste of an end,
my end,
and end filled with stars.

It taste like a badly cut movie,
with missing scenes.
The best ones thrown away.
Those were your best traits.
Action.

It breathes in the night sky.
I swear it's real.

This suicide mails those stamp-less letters,
postmarked to your younger self.
Where did I fail me?
It must have been those times I wasn't brave enough,
or it wasn't enough.
The pendulum of restlessness.

It must have been after the divorce I never understood.
That was and end to an endless war.
Good men died that day.

Those years of ripe maturity,
with tiny fragments still stuck to my heart.
behold the man you
see today.

It was all make believe, or clever guessing,
or a game of tag with no friends,
which makes no sense.
I could not be brave then too.

This suicide is now my confidant.  
It's been with me all these years.
Every Winter: here.
Every Autumn: Here.
Every Spring: here.
Every summer: here.
It's been with me through
the oceans I've cared so little about.
Through the scenes of beauty I could not
understand.
Through everything that could not fit inside my head.
Suicide, you *******, I'm through.
this death isn't funny anymore.

*I've changed my mind.
Grizzo Apr 2017
If my tongue were a pen
every word would be a postmarked
love letter to your ears.

If my tongue were a pen
my words wouldn’t have
cut so deeply and left you
with coupons you’ll never

use and bills that are past
due.

The page is my playground.

My Church.
My Sanctuary.
My Womb,

Our eyes are doorways to
the secrets that make us
who we are

This dark haired face with three
day scruff and glasses is a
single sentence out of context,

and our chapter isn’t finished.

I am fishing on a lake
at five years old.
passing my driving test,
graduating high school,

I am both an old soul
who
lived too much
too young,
and a child reaching
for candles
in the darkness.

If my tongue were a pen,
my darling,

my soul
would slide its fingers
through your eyeballs

and bury itself in
the deepest recesses
of your heart

If my tongue were a pen
instead of picking up all the
bad memories of this apartment
with piles of ***** clothes,

you would
find the words and phrases
we phased out of our lives for a forgotten
reason at the end
of an empty bottle night.

I am moving to a new city at 25,
becoming a Father.
Invisible to my child.
A Stranger.

I am meeting you for the first time,
we are children holding hands
in the darkness
We were children jumping from
swings,
We were the children
who knew just enough

We told each other all our secrets
We shut doors
We blew out candles

if my tongue were a pen
My darling,

it would tell you
we are not a mistake.

we are a
collection
of unfortunate
accidents
that became
something
beautiful.

Turn the Page.

BG-4/10/17
Antony Glaser Feb 2014
Has it rained in your  heart
and have you buried all of those
drowned kissing frogs?
The saturated coastal trail leds
you  further away.
Yet I recall the days
your postcards were postmarked
Polegate with the best of Sunshine intentions
Kristen Lowe Sep 2014
A clearing in the middle of existing
I’ll be the place you’re looking up from
The dampness on your palms when you push yourself up
From the ground floor of this skyscraper life you’re scaling

I’ll be your secret, I’ll be your anything
I’ll be an envelope sealed with the wetness of your mouth
Postmarked to “this one time when I was young I…”
Just run-on sentences  that you won’t be able to finish in the morning

I’ll be your Saturdays, but I’d like to be your Tuesdays
And the scent of second-day dishes in the sink
And detergent lifting into the rafters with the frothiness of your laughter
Following your life upwards

A string of messages, constantly being cleared
I’ll be a back door to wherever you want to go
Just hands on the back of your neck
Or just the bottom of the bottle so that you might drown your troubles in me

Since I’m drowning in you
It hurts where? Yes, it will hurt everywhere.
Stethoscope there in the room with stainless surfaces and a ticking,
No it is a tapping behind the walls stirring the blood snared along with something inside of me.
Potions and cures, then sealed containers of flowers and beakers locked away remain motionless.
As if hiding, as if afraid.
Rather, enlightened of the cells I carry.


Befriend the gallops of illusion.
Four horsemen down from the failing ceiling.
Postmarked dollhouse, scars on the ceiling, echoes joined to you at the hip.
Scars of the disease you carry and sprinkle onto chests like so many children's agony.

Hooves carry eyes to scan this barren nest of yours.

There,
the ruins of something innocent.

And there,
the photos of some memory discarded.

Assured with the reality that creation of life is but fantasy here, unattainable.


The innocent fall.

Smiling as they enter, your charms masking the smell of your closet's skeletons, a door revolving unhinges.

The coins you receive, coated in thumbprints and neglect. Mirrors of your frame.
A currency, your own currency of moans and gnashing.
Your small teeth becoming your permanent incisors.
Crumbling.
Powder then paste, yet you remain alive.

They become your master for sixty nine dollars.
They became your lover for want of a token.

Tokens forged in the booth appearing near noon.

Nothing else or again.

Then the drummer moves to erase the music of your past.

A vat overfilled with murmurs and spittle.

Your finished symphony.
Tragedy
k Oct 2014
Postmarked today,
return to sender.
Package contained:
older, no better.
Letter inside read
"keep your own 'treasure.'"
dania Nov 2017
today it is love that i have redrafted
today it is a feeling that i have re-envisioned
and let myself for the first time to feel and fill

today it is slowly filling inkwells, going backwards somehow
to refill, to have voice once more

today it is being enveloped, today it is being postmarked
today it is being posted
and let so gently go
Lawrence Hall May 2018
(To the tune of Detroit Diesels)

When we were sailors we seldom thought about
Being sailors. We thought about, well, girls
And happenin’ tunes from AFVN
‘Way down the river in happenin’ Saigon

We thought about cars and beaches and girls
And would a swing ship bring any mail today
In big red nylon sacks of envelopes
Love postmarked in a fantasy, The World

We thought about autumn and home and girls
While sandbag stacking and C-Rat snacking
We thought about being clean and dry again
While pooping and snooping in Cambodia

When we were sailors we thought about our pals
And what they were, and who
                                                       before the dust-offs flew
Wk kortas Oct 2017
West Center Street was, not so long ago,
A kaleidoscopic flood come three o’clock:
Children in waves of blues, greens, and golds
Set free from Margiotti Elementary,
The more subdued hues of the men
Finishing first shift, at the Montmorenci Mills
All filling the sidewalk
Like some great jigsaw puzzle in continual motion.
Now, the color seems to have left us for greener pastures,
Only the faded, unevenly washed yellow buses
Which take the children
To the central school over in St. Mary’s remain,
Solemn faces forlornly pressed to the windows
As they pass the ungainly and obsolete building
Now dark and silent, squat and hunched-over,
And further on the mill, gates padlocked,R
rusted pieces of chain-link pointing accusatorily downward,
As if the fault for its closing
Lies with us and us alone.

Ah, but it was different, near enough in time
That the memories remain sharp, clear, biting
And they come back in curious bits and pieces,
Like how the Market Basket stayed open twenty-four hours
So the third-shifters could shop for groceries
Without having to short-change themselves on sleep,
The lights in Carter’s Depatment Store,
Bright as Heaven itself to six-year old eyes
Fixed wonderingly on an electric football game
Or a toy bridge of the Enterprise, complete with a transporter
Which made Spock disappear As Seen on TV,
Or how, when we went to the Friday fish-fry at the Kinzua House,
We would stop at every table,
Fathers exchanging greetings, finishing those jokes
Which the noise along the line had left incomplete.

You left, just like everyone else, but not for good, of course;
It was just a temp job to make some money
Until you’d saved up enough to help out your mom.
Once you got settled, you’d come back home
To visit—by Christmas, at the very latest.
We waited outside of the old Rexall for the Trailways bus
That would take you to Erie,
And after the shortest half-hour I’d ever known
We kissed at the curb and embrace
Until the driver intimated with his horn
That we either needed to say goodbye or get a room.
Still, I knew you’d be back, as, after all
There are bonds that time and distance cannot break.



That is all over now, and those dreams
Our parents clung to like rosaries,
Where our lives were better than what they had known
Have moved south to Charlotte, or Houston, or Birmingham;
The Market Basket closed, boarded and de-windowed;
Hell, you can’t buy a single gallon of milk
Between here and Ridgway,
And the Kinzua House long gone as well,
Save for the tattoo place that occupies the space
Where the bar once was,  
And once in a while, though less so every year,
You’ll catch one of the old-timers, frozen in time,
Staring at the smokestacks of the old mill
Ancient obelisks like those
Looming over the graves of the town’s founders
Tucked away in the old section of the cemetery
Up on Bootjack Hill,
The paths chock-full with weeds and briars,
The grass unmown for some three summers now.

*When I got your card, it was postmarked from Denver;
The temp gig hadn’t lasted as long as it was supposed to,
And it’s not like Erie is a boom town, after all.
Still, you were there long enough to meet someone,
Someone, you noted who was looking ahead,
Not over his shoulder all the **** time;
Besides, you noted in your one
And ultimately failed attempt at humor
You remembered how our Geography teacher had once said
That all the land east of the Missisippi,
Even here in the foothills of the Endless Mountains,
Were simply mounds of dirt, old and dead,
While the Rockies were young, vibrant, still shifting and growing.
The card was one of those that come blank on the inside
So you can compose your own witty epithet,
As there are some sentiments so dreadful in their foolishness
That even Hallmark won’t touch them.
VDL Jun 2018
Reincarnated as a bullet
and suffering a satanized affliction,
Lucifer swan dives through a ribcage.
Typewriter slings ink on parchment
like a money shot on a porcelain chest.
Moans like a banshee.
"It's the coldest summer on record.”
Black tide of over-proof pickles the insides,
beckoning from a plot of land:
“Come on home…”
Come home to mother.
bulletcookie Sep 2018
within a postmarked envelope
sealed with a final red kiss
a blank sheet of white paper,
tear stained from glazed eyes
words having fallen short,
succumbed to folds of sorrow

-cec
Nothing personal. Just pulling on the heart strings.
saige Mar 2018
where did she live?
nobody's sure.

was she nice?
sure, the nice that borders naivety.

did i ever meet her?
maybe once or twice.
but you were far too young, and she was too far gone by then to have remembered.

what was she like?
a lovestruck ghost.
a runaway drunk on stolen scotch and romance novels.

what was his name?
we stopped saying it.
he gave her hell, and then some.

what else did he give her?
envelopes postmarked "Vietnam"
then some from a prison in Vermont.

did she have kids?
yup, your cousins, Amy, Tab and Brandi.
she never knew them, though.

did she miss them?
she wrote songs, then hitchhiked to Nashville.
sang all about those girls of hers, but never really said a thing.

did you miss her?
she wasn't the missing type.
she was always moving, we were always guessing which side of her we were meant to love.

what was her favorite color?
never thought to ask.
but she wore lots of patterns, kinda like a mask, i guess.

what about holiday?
life itself was just one long day in her world.

were her eyes brown like ours?
probably.
but too wide and dim and glazed to spot much resemblance.

do you think she was lonely?
probably not.
she had him to chase, wherever he wound up, whenever she wanted to.

so she really was in love?
since she was thirteen, she claimed.
just a kid, and we told her she was crazy, but she didn't believe us 'til it was too late.

how did she die?
with his name on her lips
biting her tongue until she bled to death.

what was her name, again?
well, she called herself "Lacey Maye."
EmB May 2020
I gave my heart away,
little pieces at a time,
in exchange for warm smiles,
lingering touches, and eyes
of the clear sea.
I sealed them up each time,
postmarked and clearly written,
delivered safe to your hands
each time.
But in your careless state,
the pieces slipped through,
falling from your fingers
to smash on the ground,
an unforgiving rendez-vous.

Those fragments are lost to me,
trampled underfoot by those
uncaring souls who do not know
the torments and trials of my
worn-out heart.

In their place is barbed wire,
ominous and spiky with its
“go away” signs,
protecting the last of my heart,
an endangered species,
running out of time.

— The End —