Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Nigel Morgan Dec 2013
A Tale for the Mid-Winter Season after the Mural by Carl Larrson

On the shortest day I wake before our maids from the surrounding farms have converged on Sundborn. Greta lives with us so she will be asleep in that deep slumber only girls of her age seem to own. Her tiny room has barely more than a bed and a chest for her clothes. There is my first painting of her on the wall, little more a sketch, but she was entranced, at seeing herself so. To the household she is a maid who looks after me and my studio,  though she is a literate, intelligent girl, city-bred from Gamla Stan but from a poor home, a widowed mother, her late father a drunkard.  These were my roots, my beginning, exactly. But her eyes already see a world beyond Sundborn. She covets postcards from my distant friends: in Paris, London, Jean in South America, and will arrange them on my writing desk, sometimes take them to her room at night to dream in the candlelight. I think this summer I shall paint her, at my desk, reading my cards, or perhaps writing her own. The window will be open and a morning breeze will make the flowers on the desk tremble.

Karin sleeps too, a desperate sleep born of too much work and thought and interruption. These days before Christmas put a strain on her usually calm disposition. The responsibilities of our home, our life, the constant visitors, they weigh upon her, and dispel her private time. Time in her studio seems impossible. I often catch her poised to disappear from a family coming-together. She is here, and then gone, as if by magic. With the older children home from their distant schools, and Suzanne arrived from England just yesterday morning, they all cannot do without lengthy conferences. They know better than disturb me. Why do you think there is a window set into my studio door? So, if I am at my easel there should be no knock to disturb. There is another reason, but that is between Karin and I.

This was once a summer-only house, but over the years we have made it our whole-year home. There was much attention given to making it snug and warm. My architect replaced all the windows and all the doors and there is this straw insulation between the walls. Now, as I open the curtains around my bed, I can see my breath float out into the cool air. When, later, I descend to my studio, the stove, damped down against the night, when opened and raddled will soon warm the space. I shall draw back the heavy drapes and open the wooden shutters onto the dark land outside. Only then I will stand before my current painting: *Brita and the Sleigh
.

Current!? I have been working on this painting intermittently for five years, and Brita is no longer the Brita of this picture, though I remember her then as yesterday. It is a picture of a winter journey for a six-year-old, only that journey is just across the yard to the washhouse. Snow, frost, birds gathered in the leafless trees, a sun dog in the sky, Brita pushing her empty sledge, wearing fur boots, Lisbeth’s old coat, and that black knitted hat made by old Anna. It is the nearest I have come to suggesting the outer landscape of this place. I bring it out every year at this time so I can check the light and the shadows against what I see now, not what I remember seeing then. But there will be a more pressing concern for me today, this shortest day.

Since my first thoughts for the final mural in my cycle for the Nationalmuseum I have always put this day aside, whatever I might be doing, wherever I may be. I pull out my first sketches, that book of imaginary tableaux filled in a day and a night in my tiny garden studio in Grez, thinking of home, of snow, the mid-winter, feeling the extraordinary power and shake of Adam of Bremen’s description of 10th C pre-Christian Uppsala, written to describe how barbaric and immoral were the practices and religion of the pagans, to defend the fragile position of the Christian church in Sweden at the time. But as I gaze at these rough beginnings made during those strange winter days in my rooms at the Hotel Chevilon, I feel myself that twenty-five year old discovering my artistic vision, abandoning oils for the flow and smudge of watercolour, and then, of course, Karin. We were part of the Swedish colony at Grez-sur-Loing. Karin lived with the ladies in Pension Laurent, but was every minute beside me until we found our own place, to be alone and be together, in a cupboard of a house by the river, in Marlotte.

Everyone who painted en-plein-air, writers, composers, they all flocked to Grez just south of Fontainebleau, to visit, sometimes to stay. I recall Strindberg writing to Karin after his first visit: It was as if there were no pronounced shadows, no hard lines, the air with its violet complexion is almost always misty; and I painting constantly, and against the style and medium of the time. How the French scoffed at my watercolours, but my work sold immediately in Stockholm. . . and Karin, tall, slim, Karin, my muse, my lover, my model, her boy-like figure lying naked (but for a hat) in the long grass outside my studio. We learned each other there, the technique of bodies in intimate closeness, the way of no words, the sharing of silent thoughts, together on those soft, damp winter days when our thoughts were of home, of Karin’s childhood home at Sundborn. I had no childhood thoughts I wanted to return to, but Karin, yes. That is why we are here now.

In Grez-sur-Loing, on a sullen December day, mist lying on the river, our garden dead to winter, we received a visitor, a Swedish writer and journalist travelling with a very young Italian, Mariano Fortuny, a painter living in Paris, and his mentor the Spaniard Egusquiza. There was a woman too who Karin took away, a Parisienne seamstress I think, Fortuny’s lover. Bayreuth and Wagner, Wagner, Wagner was all they could talk about. Of course Sweden has its own Nordic Mythology I ventured. But where is it? What is it? they cried, and there was laughter and more mulled wine, and then talk again of Wagner.

When the party left I realized there was something deep in my soul that had been woken by talk of the grandeur and scale of Wagner’s cocktail of German and Scandinavian myths and folk tales. For a day and night I sketched relentlessly, ransacking my memory for those old tales, drawing strong men and stalwart, flaxen-haired women in Nordic dress and ornament. But as a new day presented itself I closed my sketch book and let the matter drop until, years later, in a Stockholm bookshop I chanced upon a volume in Latin by Adam of Bremen, his Gesta Hammaburgensis Ecclesiae Pontificum, the most famous source to pagan ritual practice in Sweden. That cold winter afternoon in Grez returned to me and I felt, as I had then, something stir within me, something missing from my comfortable world of images of home and farm, family and the country life.

Back in Sundborn this little volume printed in the 18th C lay on my desk like a question mark without a sentence. My Latin was only sufficient to get a gist, but the gist was enough. Here was the story of the palace of Uppsala, the great centre of the pre-Christian pagan cults that brought us Odin and Freyr. I sought out our village priest Dag Sandahl, a good Lutheran but who regularly tagged Latin in his sermons. Yes, he knew the book, and from his study bookshelf brought down an even earlier copy than my own. And there and then we sat down together and read. After an hour I was impatient to be back in my studio and draw, draw these extraordinary images this text brought to life unbidden in my imagination. But I did not leave until I had persuaded Pastor Sandahl to agree to translate the Uppsala section of the Adam of Bremen’s book, and just before Christmas that year, on the day before the Shortest Day, he delivered his translation to my studio. He would not stay, but said I should read the passages about King Domalde and his sacrifice at the Winter Solstice. And so, on the day of the Winter Solstice, I did.

This people have a widely renowned sanctuary called Uppsala.

By this temple is a very large tree with extending branches. It is always green, both in winter and in summer. No one knows what kind of tree this is. There is also a spring there, where the heathens usually perform their sacrificial rites. They throw a live human being into the spring. If he does not resurface, the wishes of the people will come true.

The Temple is girdled by a chain of gold that hangs above the roof of the building and shines from afar, so that people may see it from a distance when they approach there. The sanctuary itself is situated on a plain, surrounded by mountains, so that the form a theatre.

It is not far from the town of Sigtuna. This sanctuary is completely covered with golden ornaments. There, people worship the carved idols of three gods: Thor, the most powerful of them, has his throne in the middle of the hall, on either side of him, Odin and Freyr have their seats. They have these functions: “Thor,” they say, “rules the air, he rules thunder and lightning, wind and rain, good weather and harvests. The other, Odin, he who rages, he rules the war and give courage to people in their battle against enemies. The third is Freyr, he offers to mortals lust and peace and happiness.” And his image they make with a very large phallus. Odin they present armed, the way we usually present Mars, while Thor with the scepter seems to resemble Jupiter. As gods they also worship some that have earlier been human. They give them immortality for the sake of their great deeds, as we may read in Vita sancti Ansgarii that they did with King Eirik.

For all these gods have particular persons who are to bring forward the sacrificial gifts of the people. If plague and famine threatens, they offer to the image of Thor, if the matter is about war, they offer to Odin, but if a wedding is to be celebrated, they offer to Freyr. And every ninth year in Uppsala a great religious ceremony is held that is common to people from all parts of Sweden.”
Snorri also relates how human sacrifice began in Uppsala, with the sacrifice of a king.

Domalde took the heritage after his father Visbur, and ruled over the land. As in his time there was great famine and distress, the Swedes made great offerings of sacrifice at Upsal. The first autumn they sacrificed oxen, but the succeeding season was not improved thereby. The following autumn they sacrificed men, but the succeeding year was rather worse. The third autumn, when the offer of sacrifices should begin, a great multitude of Swedes came to Upsal; and now the chiefs held consultations with each other, and all agreed that the times of scarcity were on account of their king Domalde, and they resolved to offer him for good seasons, and to assault and **** him, and sprinkle the stall of the gods with his blood. And they did so.


There it was, at the end of Adam of Bremen’s description of Uppsala, this description of King Domalde upon which my mural would be based. It is not difficult to imagine, or rather the event itself can be richly embroidered, as I have over the years made my painting so. Karin and I have the books of William Morris on our shelves and I see little difference between his fixation on the legends of the Arthur and the Grail. We are on the cusp here between the pagan and the Christian.  What was Christ’s Crucifixion but a self sacrifice: as God in man he could have saved himself but chose to die for Redemption’s sake. His blood was not scattered to the fields as was Domalde’s, but his body and blood remains a continuing symbol in our right of Communion.

I unroll the latest watercolour cartoon of my mural. It is almost the length of this studio. Later I will ask Greta to collect the other easels we have in the house and barn and then I shall view it properly. But for now, as it unrolls, my drama of the Winter Solstice comes alive. It begins on from the right with body of warriors, bronze shields and helmets, long shafted spears, all set against the side of Uppsala Temple and more distant frost-hoared trees. Then we see the King himself, standing on a sled hauled by temple slaves. He is naked as he removes the furs in which he has travelled, a circuit of the temple to display himself to his starving people. In the centre, back to the viewer, a priest-like figure in a red cloak, a dagger held for us to see behind his back. Facing him, in druidic white, a high priest holds above his head a gold pagan monstrance. To his left there are white cloaked players of long, straight horns, blue cloaked players of the curled horns, and guiding the shaft of the sled a grizzled shaman dressed in the skins and furs of animals. The final quarter of my one- day-to-be-a-mural unfolds to show the women of temple and palace writhing in gestures of grief and hysteria whilst their queen kneels prostate on the ground, her head to the earth, her ladies ***** behind her. Above them all stands the forever-green tree whose origin no one knows.

Greta has entered the studio in her practiced, silent way carrying coffee and rolls from the kitchen. She has seen Midvinterblot many times, but I sense her gaze of fascination, yet again, at the figure of the naked king. She remembers the model, the sailor who came to stay at Kartbacken three summers ago. He was like the harpooner Queequeg in Moby ****. A tattooed man who was to be seen swimming in Toftan Lake and walking bare-chested in our woods. A tall, well-muscled, almost silent man, whom I patiently courted to be my model for King Dolmade. I have a book of sketches of him striding purposefully through the trees, the tattooed lines on his shoulders and chest like deep cuts into his body. This striding figure I hid from the children for some time, but from Greta that was impossible. She whispered to me once that when she could not have my substantial chest against her she would imagine the sailor’s, imagine touching and following his tattooed lines. This way, she said, helped her have respite from those stirrings she would so often feel for me. My painting, she knew, had stirred her fellow maids Clara and Solveig. Surely you know this, she had said, in her resolute and direct city manner. I have to remember she is the age of my eldest, who too must hold such thoughts and feelings. Karin dislikes my sailor king and wishes I would not hide the face of his distraught queen.

Today the sunrise is at 9.0, just a half hour away, and it will set before 3.0pm. So, after this coffee I will put on my boots and fur coat, be well scarfed and hatted (as my son Pontus would say) and walk out onto my estate. I will walk east across the fields towards Spardasvvägen. The sky is already waiting for the sun, but waits without colour, hardly even a tinge of red one might expect.

I have given Greta her orders to collect every easel she can find so we can take Midvinterblot off the floor and see it in all its vivid colour and form. In February I shall begin again to persuade the Nationalmuseum to accept this work. We have a moratorium just now. I will not accept their reasoning that there is no historical premise for such a subject, that such a scene has no place in a public gallery. A suggestion has been made that the Historiska museet might house it. But I shall not think of this today.

Karin is here, her face at the studio window beckons entry. My Darling, yes, it is midwinter’s day and I am dressing to greet the solstice. I will dress, she says, to see Edgar who will be here in half an hour to discuss my designs for this new furniture. We will be lunching at noon. Know you are welcome. Suzanne is talking constantly of England, England, and of course Oxford, this place of dreaming spires and good looking boys. We touch hands and kiss. I sense the perfume of sleep, of her bed.

Outside I must walk quickly to be quite alone, quite apart from the house, in the fields, alone. It is on its way: this light that will bathe the snowed-over land and will be my promise of the year’s turn towards new life.

As I walk the drama of Midvinterblot unfolds in a confusion of noise, the weeping of women, the physical exertions of the temple slaves, the priests’ incantations, the riot of horns, and then suddenly, as I stand in this frozen field, there is silence. The sun rises. It stagge
To see images of the world of Sundborn and Carl Larrson (including Mitvinterblot) see http://www.clg.se/encarl.aspx
Going to bed last night was never by choice
But because the day is dark
Every being has gone to bed
Even the wind is saying goodnight
But when I close my eyes
All I could do is say
Goodmorning to you Karin Naude
All I wished is for the morning to draw nearer
So I could be the first being on earth to say
Goodmorning to you Karin Naude
Even before the **** rings his bell by crowing
Even before the sweet songs of the birds
All mornings are like paintings
You need a smile to brighten up
With petals of roses
Palm full of holly water
You need a little inspiration to get going
A text message from someone who really care
The sun wishes u a goodmorning
Even as he rises into the sky
Hoping you have a perfect day
Wishing you a goodmorning
Sealed with with prayers to keep you save
and happy all day long
A goodmorning spoken with care,love and happiness
I woke this morning before my body did to say
Goodmorning to you Karin Naude
I love you Karin Naude

From the moment I know you
I know you will be the song I sing in the morning
the books I read in the day
And the prayers I pray at night

We might be far away from each other
But you are  close to my heart always
To many lovers,distance is seen as a torture or punishment to relationship
But to us I say its a test of love
For love is when you are far away, you still realise that its getting even stronger

I love u Karin Naude
I wanna be part of your heart beat
I wanna cross all limits to say I love you my wishes are so complete with you in them

If loving you is a crime
I don't mind going to jail for it
I will use the last breath I got to say I love you Karin Naude

I wished for three most important things always in my life
And they are
YOU, YOU and YOU
I love you Karin Naude
Inukit ko ang pangalan nating dalawa sa isang puno
Simbolo Ito kung gaano kita ka mahal, mahal ko
Naka ukit sa punong iyon lahat ng ating mga pangako
Mag mamahalan tayo pang habang buhay kahit labag man sa atin pati ang mundo

Sabay tayong nangarap noon
At alam kung balang araw matutupad iyon
Pero tila labag talaga sa atin ang mundo
Mga pangako'y bigla nalang nag laho at na pako

Tinangay ng malakas na hangin ang munting pangarap natin
Tila kahit saan ito tangayin ay kay hirap na itong hanapin
Bakas ang pangungulila at lungkot sa aking mga mata
Dahil kahit katiting na pag-asa'y di ko na makita

Umalis ka at ako'y iyong iniwan
Lungkot at pananabik na sanay babalik ka at hinding hindi na kita bibitawan
Para akung pulubing palaboy laboy kahit saan
Tulad ng pag mamahal natin di ko alam kung saan ang patutongohan

Iyong ngite na parang araw na nagbibigay liwanag sa buhay ko
Pero ang ngiting iyon di ko na nasisilayan kaya biglang nag dilim ang mundo
Mga yakap mo gusto kung madama muli
Mahal ko bumalik kana at alam kung hindi pa ito ang huli

Madalas akung pumupunta doon sa may puno kung saan naka ukit ang ating mga pangalan
Dahil alam ko na doon mo ako iniwan at doon mo rin ako babalikan
Tila buhay ay parang sentonadong guitara
Wala nang direksyon ang mga nota dahil nawala na pati yong kopya

Lumipas ang ilang araw hindi ka parin bumabalik
Mas gustohin ko nalang sumoko dahil dito sa sakit
May bagong pangarap kana ata diyan mahal dahil di muna ako binalikan
Masakit pero sige sisimulan narin kitang kalimutan

Tumanda na ang munting kahoy na ating pinag ukitan
Kay tanda narin ng pag-ibig natin na iyong tinalikuran
Ilang taon na ang lumipas at kay rami na ang nag bago
Pero pag mamahal ko sayo pang habang buhay naka ukit sa punong ito

Ngayon may kanya kanya na tayong sariling buhay
Buhay na pinangarap natin Pero ito'y namatay
Masaya na ako mahal sa buhay kung ito
Sana ganon karin katulad ng nararamdaman ko sayo

Mahal ang punong ito, ay mananatiling simbolo at Manana tiling naka ukit ang ating na udlot na pangako
Can't do without you Karin Naude

Sometimes I thought I can go a day without thinking of  you
Sometimes I thought  I could do without calling your phone
Sometimes I wanna know how strong I am to miss you in a minute
Sometime I wanna pretend am not obsessed with you
I pretend that I don't want to hear your voice
But am wrong
I realise am weak because I can't do without you Karin
I can't go a day without thinking about
us
I feel so lonely when you are not around me
For your present make me feel on top of the world
I can't go a day  without thinking about the love we share
The song we sing
Our kisses
Our touches
Can't go a day without hearing  the most beautiful and charming voice in the world
Missing you in a minute is a punishment to my heart
I wanna suffocate when you are away from me
I can't do without your sweet words
Can't do without your smile
Can't do without your happiness
Above all
I can't do without you Karin Naude
You r the queen of my great kingdom
And am the king
There is no doubt we will make the very best royalty
Sometimes I thought am complete without a queen but am wrong because I can't get my mind of you as my queen
When I sleep at night and found my queen sleeping right beside me great joy takes over me, cos my. Strength is here. With me
And when I woke up in the morning found her beside me I feel stronger and healthier because my heart is with me  
The very first day I met you something tells me you have all the traits of royalty
You are not just my queen
You are my love
My heart
My breath
A day without you is like a day without my  breath
Missing u pose a big threat to my kingdom because you made me complete when you are around me
My queen
My adviser
My mentor
Karin Naude is the Queen of my great kingdom
Karin Naude is the queen of my life
Today is the day she was born
Press---- really who is she?
Ooooooohhh!! My sweet  Karin Naude

Press-----who is she to u
Good question, she is my love
My heart, my honey, my inspiration
The only one my heart longs for
The one I love and will always love
She is my everything, she is all I have and all I wanted

Press-----wow I can see how exited u are, so tell me more
Ooohh yes what more can I say about her  who take me for who I am
Even when I never believed in myself she do believe in me
When i was in the mood of despondency, she gave me hope
She always say to me, baby u can do it and I always find myself doing it

Press----- interesting, so what other thing do u want to tell us about her
Yes she is meek she is a  person who loves, who cares,
who sees a person’s need and fills it,
who encourages and lifts people up,
who spends energy on others
rather than herself,
someone who touches each life she enters,
and makes a difference in the world

Press---- wow she got good heart
Ooh man good heart is understatement, I have never seen a word, I mean a single word to qualify who she really was

Press---- so what do u wish her in her birthday
I wish her the best in life,
because ripples of kindness flow outward
as each person you have touched, touches others.
Your birthday deserves to be a national holiday,
because you are a special treasure
for all that you’ve done.
May the love you have shown to others
return to you, multiplied in million folds

Press--- isn't dat too much wishes for her,ooh man u just said national holiday
Yes nothing is too much when it comes to my love, she worth more than what I said, I wish I have more to say dan happy birthday my one and only Karin Naude
I love u so much
Goodnight Karin Naude
When I say goodnight
Is not a formality
Nor due to free text messages
It has a silent way of saying
I remember every beautiful moments we share by day
We are friends from far away
Every nights we play the game
We talk about families and about our day
Darkness is everywhere
The birds are back to there nets
The road is cool and quiet
Everyone has gone to bed
But am awake just to say goodnight
Night is a nice gift from God
So open it by closing your eyes
You will see another sweet world waiting for you
I want you to know that I remember you in my last minute of the day by saying
Goodnight to you Karin Naude
untoldstory Mar 2017
Pangako.
Sing lalim ng dagat ang pagiisip ng sandali
Sa mga susunod na tinginan,
Ngiti,
Mo ang umaaya,maghintay,suungin ang mga alon ng pagsubok,
Kasabay ng ibat ibang mandirigmang sumubok makuha ang perlas ng iyong karagatan,
Natututo akong makidigma,kahit nagmamanhid na ang mga braso,lumaban,ako dahil mahal kita.

Maghihintay ako

Kahit ilang araw o buwan ang lumipas,wala ka sa tabi akoy narito palagi, ang makita kang masaya,
Ang ngiti, sa yong mga labi ay sapat na upang akoy maghintay.
Ang mga bulak **** kamay na nagaayang lumapit, saakin habang nakatitig ako sa bawat pagpikit, ng iyong mga mata na nagsasabing kumapit.

Nagsisimula palang ang paglalakbay,
Pagpasok, sa ibat ibang hamon mo,
Pagsuko,takot?
Hindi yan ang sagot sa tanong na inaantay,sa tanong na matagal ko ng hinihintay,ang sagot.

Mangangako ako sayo pero mangako karin saken

Pangakong hindi ako mananakit ,pero mangako kang hindi mo ako ipagpapalit.

Pangako kong ang pagpili mo saken ay hindi mo pagsisisihan, atipangako **** hindi mo ko isasama sayong pagpipilian.

Pangako kong hindi lahat ng oras mo ay aking kukunin,pero ipangako **** mag lalaan ka ng attention para saken.

Pangako kong walang iba kungdi ikaw,at ipangako **** di ka bibitaw.

Pangakong magiging importante ka para saken,pero ipangako **** hindi mo ako paaasahin.

Na ang pangako ko ay hindi basta pangako,na ang pangako ko ay handang maglakbay, na maging alalay na laging nakasunod,
Sa ikatakda na ikay maging handa,
Maghihintay ako,pangako.
MY ANGEL ON EARTH (KARIN NAUDE)
She cares,
She loves
And she have trust in me
She believes in me even when the world gave up on me
She calls me the  champ even when I lost a fight
She never sees me as a failure like other peoples philosophy about me
She gave the winning spirit which keeps going all day long

She is my love and my best friend
She escape from heaven just to be with
Her loved one, me
Ooh behold the beautiful light skinned angel always tell me I can do it,
Always tell me I can move mountains,
I never believed in my self but she dose
She work her self out all day to put a smile on my face
Her voice sounds like a classical music cool and calm which keep playing in my heart all day
Her smiles sends a message to me saying all is fine trust your self and focus on the big picture                      

My guardian angel, my best friend
She left heaven such beautiful and enjoyable place to be with me on earth
A place with pains, agony, politics and envy
Making thousands of  friends in a day dose not matter
What matters is keeping one for years
A thought about you says goodbye to my depression
You gave my hope life even when I was kept in the mood of despondency
Ooh!! its not just our love
Its our friendship
You are my lover
My best friend
My one and only
You gave me reason to breath once again even when I though joining my ancestors was the last option
She never left me alone
She was right here when am putting these down
She inspires me, she said baby u can do even much more better
My angel what more can I say than to say  
I love you........................................
My angel on earth
Karijinbba Aug 2018
Love Story byAndy Williams
'Unforgetable"
"I'll Be Seeing You."
"Can't get enough of your love"
"Are You Lonesome Tonight."
I'll Make Love To You"
"What a wonderful world"
Red red Wine
At Last.
"Yesterday" J.Lenon
~~~~
[ Nathan, Joseph-Pat-Rick ]
Close your eyes, make a wish
And blow out the candlelight
For tonight is just your night
We're gonna celebrate,
all thru the night

[Shawn Pat.Rick, J Paul Taylor ]
Pour the wine, light the fire
Guinevere your wish is my command
I submit to your demands
I will do anything, Karijinbba, you need only ask

[ Joseph-Paul-Patrick-Richard]
I'll make love to you
Like you want me to
And I'll hold you tight
Angelina-babe
all through the night
I'll make love to you
When you want me to
And I will not let go
'Till you tell me to

[Wanya, Shawn, Pat-Rick]
my true love AnKarijin,
relax let's go slow!
I ain't got nowhere to go
I'm just gonna concentrate on you the whole night through
My Kariginny are you ready?
it's gonna be a long night.
Throw your clothes (Throw your clothes) on the floor (on the floor)

[Shawn Wanja, Nathan, Pat-Rick]
I'm gonna take my clothes off too
I made plans to be with you queen bee mine Karin whatever you ask me, you know, I could do

[Angel'Q Karijinbba Chinny Chin]
I'll make love to you too
Like you want me to Rickie babe
And I'll hold you tight
My baby Pat
all through the night
I'll make love to you
When you want me to
And I will not let go
'Till you tell me to!

[Wanya,Shawn,PatRick, Nathan:]
Angeli'q Babychin
tonight is your night
And I will do you right
Just make a wish on your night
Anything that you ask
I will give you the love of your life, your life, your life
love of my life.
~~~~
Boys To Men: For:Karijinbba.
start 54-(74-95)-05.end.
This songs I choose to play on my HeadStone...when I die.. To all the man who sang and danced with me.
even if it was only a Scripted love. sigh..PLEASE DON'T LAUGH BECAUSE WHEN I WAS DONE HERE I LAUGHED SO HARD MY TOMMY HURT;so did my daughters.
Thank you can never be able to appreciate  what u did in my life
U brought me happiness when am sad
You inspired me into a writer I never knew I will be
When am in the mood of despondency you comfort me and give me hope

Even as we part ways I will still cherish the memories we share
I wish you the best in life  
I just wanna say thank your love
Your care
Your encouragement
Your teachings.
You remain the best I have had
Thank you Karin  Naude
karin naude Mar 2013
i can Imagen the endless potential of my world
free of knowing "my place"
no boring old broken time machines
just open white space
hungry for fresh ideas and experiments
this is my dream, my desire, my hope
me rid of this stupid wrong labelled box
just me, Karin, just Karin

i don't like this world i was born into
it praised cowards and anoint liars
crucify truth speakers and freedom fighters
real leaders are played down and ridiculed
they promote brainless followers, zombies
all for love of money and power
" see i can squash you"
just try and breath without permission

my box is labeled ******, gull-able  joke, incapable, stupid, unteachable, bad writer and much much more

i want to be free of this box
it's killing me slowly, ******* my bones dry
i peek out
  - blue swollen eyes
  - broken bones
  - crushed soul

someday. . . .
We want to be together forever
We make plans and we work towards achieving them
Though we are far away but within us we knew we are close
We plan to have a family together
Have kids, boys and girls
Send them to school
Give them the comfortable life they deserved
Have a farm, raise cows cattle, sheep


But nature was against us
We kept falling like a tree
We kept going and going further apart
Yet we don't know the cause
Was it distance?
Was it lack of communication?
We can't still figure it out
Our love for each other seems to fade away and yet we don't know

We tried to make it work
We put in all the best we can
We tried and we got tired
Maybe is our fate to be apart
Maybe we are not destined to be together
No matter how hard we tried things kept falling apart

Its our fate
And we accepted it with good fate
But we will never forget what we had together
The moment we share
nick armbrister Jan 2018
simply a girl
imagine being called karin ulbricht
imagine being a student
imagine being unhappy
imagine demonstrating in leipzig
imagine it was early november 1989
imagine being arrested
imagine girls separated from boys
imagine being taken to the barracks
imagine that this was east germany
imagine it was the cold war
imagine that you were ******* terrified
imagine you were defiant
imagine you wanted to change things
imagine that you actually did
imagine that you were just a girl
imagine that you were the girl
imagine that you are her
imagine that you stood against the whole communist world
imagine that this was you
imagine that you helped knock the berlin wall down...
real events before the wall fell. respect...
JJ Hutton Aug 2019
Karin, in my t-shirt, standing
eternal in the doorframe,
saddle-stitching the smell
of juniper with the gentle
caress of her damp hair,
plucked white, shaved clean
and there's music, it's a Saturday,
there's a wind careening through
the pines, a steady rain picking
at the windowsill, and I want
to hold time, to dissipate its march,
to let the love between us linger,
to indulge the soft pang of desire
indefinitely, to eek out of my borders,
to blend, to float above my body,
above Karin, to see it all with such
clarity, to return to form, to bend,
to worship, to stay, to stay in this
small room, to stay in this twin bed,
tangled, poor, blissed out, cherished,
tethered.
I met a special lady on smoothies
From different country
I added her as a friend and thanks to her she accepted me
We started chatting
Started knowing each other
We both discover we have many things in common which makes us even

We started asking each other how was ur day and asking about families
We became so attatched to each other
We got even more closer that we don't hide anything from each other
We are far from each other but we don't know that because. We are so close to know that we ain't from same country
We make so many plans as if we have met before

I appreciate each time she spends with me online, because she no longer make me feel lonely and deserted, my feelings get stronger for her
And we finally fell in love
She compliments each messages I compose for her
And I do too
She said, baby are u a poet, I replied no
She said, baby your messages are so poetic and I think you will make a good poet, I was happy because someone for the first time make me feel so special,
Online dating works and I feel safer with this special lady than ladies I have seen that  broke my heart at last
Remember(she made me a poet)

To.....................KARIN NAUDE
Mateuš Conrad Jul 2018
/                                 ....i started to, sort of,
                           forget the world...

i mean:

            reading karin jones' article,
        and the extra s she uses,
                                  after an apostrophe?

i can't but gloat in literary
                                                   pedantry -
              everyone else does some
sort of pedantic excuse
to begin with...

            the welsh & irish marching
band?
             so... that's o.k.?

        ha ha!
            i just love their nibbling
of a coherent march of bodies
in a slavic army,

               quasi-****: feet above hands...

nibbling "marching" while standing
still,
           nibbling,
                      a proper ****-up fest...

shame about those red coats
adorned by, what appears to be,
   a ****** fest of marching squares...

i'll admit:
   that's the only time you can
make a genuine laughter excuse...
       the british army's parade squadron...

****: have to get my mongolian
harmonica out for this opinion...
  
   motorboat of fluffly lips +
             an up & down index finger
moving, just shy of
                    interfering with the lip...
****!
        can't even ascribe
an onomatopoeia
                                  to that ****!

foul mouth?
      well, i did pay an extra £10
   on the already brothel owner's £10
entry fee,
   for the £110 for an audience
with a woman:
                that no psychiatrists
can replace -
                     and will end up bashing
his head against a brick wall
to suspend compensation...

                the extra £10?
                         oral ***...
   a my my my my my what
                       a mighty paradox!
prostitutes charge an extra £10
to perform oral *** on them,
   on top of the £110 you already paid
for an hour...
   but then when you kiss
them, they become divisive...

        sneaky ******* that i am...
i'm glad that i managed to steal
at least two,
       to pardon a faculty of
                   memory and banking...

toes, wrist, that thing that's a first
at the end of the foot connecting
the fetish...

                         it really is hilarious!
how can a nurse, check my pulse,
when touching my wrist?!

              i've already spotted two
places on my body, where she actually could,
but won't...

   under the right arm-pit,
   and just above the right-side of
the collar-bone...

    i gather that the latter posit is more
hygienic...
   but come on!
             pulse reading... on the wrist?!
can you actually "read" (count)
a pulse in an area of so much
bone shrapnel, veins... but no arteries?!

i thought you needed an artery
to check a pulse,
   rather than veins, that... literally
have no measure of the heart's existence,
rather: what encompasses
being in the possession of other organs
having utilißed... well... their utility!

she doesn't kiss... but charges an extra £10
to perform oral *** on her...

you would really think it was
the other way round.

who reads a pulse while pressing down
on a wrist?!
      you could count it

   without that ****** artefact of
cold pressed against the chest
        (algorithm the noun:  
  ...      ...             ....................  
         .. . .            .....
                  ............      
medical instrument to check pulse
  ...      ...             ....................  
         .. . .            .....
                  ............    ....        ....
****... new entry:
        medical hearing aid................
.... ...          ....           ....       .. .....
   ..........................................
****, no good)

                      within the confines
of the two "mandarin voodoo" coordinates
on the body i already stressed!

but no...
      medical arithmetic of the heart
on the tip of a finger,
or by squeezing
                      the bicep and tricep
part of the arm to expose an artery...

    i already possess knowledge of two!
two! arteries in my body,
and all i had to do was... find them!

it's like 20th and 19th century
anthropological studies made
                                  europeans dumb;

sorry...
  
               techno-*******-cratic.
i love her and i cant explain it
her name is karin naude
a south african
sometime i try to wave her off my mind
i realised that i cant go a day without thinking about her
i cant think unless am thinking about her
i cant sing unless am singing about her
i cant live if am to live without her
she gave me a reason to write again
she gave me a reason to love again
when am alone i dont have to look for  cos she is always there for me
when am wrong she make things right
she is the love of my life
Ara Mae Apr 2020
Naalala ko noon, saksi ang kalawakan kung gaano natuwa ang aking puso ng ika’y nakita. Ramdam ko ang tibok ng aking puso, dahil sobrang kinikilig ako. Magkahawak kamay. Yun bang HHWW sa burnham park pero.... pero isang gabi, bigla nalang bumigat ang pusong dating kinikilig, at biglang nagkahiwalay ang ating mga kamay.  Mga ala alang inukit dito sa aking puso, bigla nalang nag laho.

Ang ngiti sa aking mukha napalitan ng sakit, ang dulo ay iyong natagpuan. Bakit? Bakit hindi ka lumaban? habang ako, hindi nawawalan ng pag asang mananatili ka dito. Bakit hindi ka kumapit? Habang ang kamay ko’y mahigpit ang kapit sa kamay **** bigla nalang nanlamig. Noong gabing yon, naglakad lakad kung saan saan, at ang mga nadadaanan nakikisabay pa sa aking kalungkutan mga tugtugin na para bang alam nila ang aking pinag dadaanan, para bang nananadya ang tadhana. Ang dami ko palang karamay sa lungkot, na dulot ng kahapon. Pero bumalik ako nagbabasakaling babalik karin sa piling ko.

Noong pumikit ako, nang makita ang dilim, natakot na baka ito rin ang iyong nakita ng ika’y lumisan sa aking piling. Ngunit tinangay ng hangin ang takot at napalitan ng tuwa ng ipakita saakin ang liwanag, at nandun ka. Habang nakapikit ako, makita ko sanang muli ng malapitan ang mukha mo, na sana ang ngiting iyong iniwan dito sa lupa, dala dala mo parin nang ika’y nakarating sa kung saan ka nararapat.
Pagdilat ko, matapos ang gabing punong puno ng pait at pasakit, saksi ang kalawakan kung gaano nasaktan ang puso ng ika’y lumisan. Ngunit hindi na kasing sakit ng dati, dahil alam kong masaya ka na, at hindi kana nasasaktan, dahil kasama mo na ang lumikha sa sayo. Pangako, nandito lang ako, na kahit nagtapos na ang kwento, ng ikaw at ako, ang tayo. Hinding hindi ka mawawala dito sa puso ko.
Karin Roos Jan 2019
In the distance a ray of light I feel,
It is strangely not the reality I around me see.
My reality is so different from what my heart yearns,
But I do still feel the inviting warmth of what my future could be.

The heat becomes stronger hour by hour
The visions of the dreaming future
It invades even in the sleeping hour
How long can this incessant burning be ignored.

The heart wants what it needs, the warmth
And no amount of financial gain
Will be able to melt the frozen core
True happiness comes only from relieving the freezing pain.

The sunlit path is clear and only your heart
You must follow and the challenging art
Will be to let go of the fear
Your heart will sing when to the warm light your draw near.

Your true self, your earthly mission
And your real reason for living.

By Karin Roos
Mateuš Conrad Jan 2020
.it's almost akin to the germans, having experienced, discovered thought... strange, though, they "learned" to think, but were able, to write, prior. isn't that strange? they were made, illuminated by the sight, prior to hearing the runes, of, the, squabbling, ruined! ruined: rune bound. have the germans, ever thought? i gather: they never have; sie noch nie haben...

why wouldn't i believe in the existence
of the gods,
when i see so many people,
borrow, traits from them?
                        Loki:
             e.g. agent provocateur...
who am i to think of?
      to pledge allegiance to?
if ever: the death of god,
then the rebirth: of the gods.
         i would believe in the death of
gods, if i didn't see
iconoclasm of the mundane whipe
and whiff presence of my fellow
mortals...
                  fame and a god-riddled
status-presence...
        with my own,
                    augen zu sehen!
moimi okami: widzieć -
     oczem: niet oko...
                      not eye...
   oczem:
                        paraphrasing...
oczem: with an eye
  (oczyma - using eyes)
via                         o czym:
about what?
                czyn: deed.
                      
can't people even understand
personification in form?!
does it always require a conjuring
of some quasi-fictive altruism?

         no wonder i can't solve a single
kreuzwortpuzzle...
              the polacks,
and their perpetual noun
                   crisis...
                     kommen sie
von ein sprache
           das schwer leiht...
                woda / voda...
    wódka / *****....
                        oh, really? the soviets
were so bad in east Berlin?
you, you really want to know,
how the allies treated
the west berliners?
                 wir, kinder vom Bahnhof Zoo,
christine F.,
                              how did the allies
flood western Berlin with,
what speaks synonym-esque
tactic of the British Empire with
the ***** trade in China...
        i'm having to start to believe,
that the Germans? zee: Gyrmans?
sado-masochists...
                     1981...
         western berlin,
in western germany...
              it's not so bad,
in the east, living in chicken shacks...
at leat you were allowed
to live under a roof...
       western germany?
plagued by a ****** epidemic...
          what's not, to, "love"?
                    detlef R.,
                            lutz F.,
              catharina Sch.,
        andreas W.,
                            babette B.,
           werner H.,
                       michael S.,
            bärbel W.,
                             karin S.,
            livia S.,
                        rudl H.,
                              dirk L.,
                                detlef R.,
                  
this is how criminals are allocated their
media presence...
         ruf!
                     well, grand,
westsächsischjurisprudenz...
what do you call a deterrant?
   abschreckend?
                         ja?
                  when you have a jurisprudence,
that, works, as a, deterrant?
when you, actually, cage criminals?
rather than comedians,
who, are not caged, or sentenced,
and roam freely...
making the free people, a joke?

       one example: Tomasz Komenda...
i am a sick *******,
  but i'm thinking of...
those instances of ol' Jimmy S'ah-vil...
in the jurisprudent complex
of the saxon,
  the victim, sure, the victim is
allowed redemption and justice: death...
the accused is also given
redemption and justice: death...
              
   the philosophy of passing law,
incubated by: presumed innocent,
until, proven guilty,
over, guilty, until proven innocent...
i would think the latter,
to be a deterrent...
   if you have method of passing
judgement, against all favours...
            ascribed unto you...

            ich, mein herz:
                                          zu du.

i don't want to speak of justice no
more...
         simply because:
the justice i crave,
will not be served,
not with death, at least,
                    and whatever justice,
what comes with death,
i am, prone,
to at least mind
in making myself forget...
         if the reverse is true,
innocent until proven
guilty,
rather than guilty until
proven guilty...
  then... come my saving
mother, death,
             i wait for "giving" birth
to my ego...
detached from a body...
               i wait for the day,
when i am guilty,
akin to nibbling
on the fruit,
akin to the religiosity,
original sin,
   guilty until proven
innocent....
                                             ­      whatever.
Karin Roos Jan 2019
The blank page greets me like an old companion,
A certain peace emanated.
No expectations, yet so much expectation,
As the pages fill their potential anticipated.

Anything is possible limitations fade away.
The magic, the mystery, the mystical creation,
Shows its face, slowly, gently, and so deliberately.
Deep breaths to begin, the possibilities can be daunting.

Nothing is wrong, nothing is taboo.
Wings, horns and wands are cherished,
Their imagery floating into their groove.
One idea at a time, forever liberated.

Now as they find their spot and are at rest,
Friends there any time to devoir.
To take you away, to encore,
On that familiar path to explore.

No place here for reality,
With its limiting rules, high walled boundaries,
Suffocating rigidity.
Only unhindered ideas and memories.

The lines go on and on.
So does the dream, possibility and wonder.

By Karin Roos
I would love some feedback and criticism in order to get better.
Zywa Aug 2020
With Maria and Karin in Blixembosch
love flows
between the words and thoughts

We do not hold each other's hands
and do not close our eyes
but we try

to understand it better
to be able to explain it better
to students and ourselves

Whatever love is, I feel it

between us, I am, we are
complete, open, we are
not interfering with ourselves

and the love among us
is not ours
it flows
Universal life energy (Reiki)

Collection "The Big Secret"

— The End —