As I sit and searched my feelings, my thoughts are filled with you.

I think of all the memories created sending a flood of emotions through.

You would always say when someone would leave it was their time, they had to go.

And with those words you had to go but in years I needed more.

You said to remember the things you taught, as you would not be here to ask.

So I put on a face of certitude, a facade in the mode of a mask.

As now, I must face the world without you, much more than one could ask.

We assured you that your job on earth as a mother,  protector,  plus more was felt.

That your guidance through our lives, was much bigger than just help.

The love I feel when I say your name will always be the same

As my grandchildren continue to grow, they will all know your name.

I will share my fondest memories and tell them how this life I live you saved

and how with little and such a big heart the bountifulness of love you gave.

I will teach them as you taught me,  how Fords were designed and made tough

and I will always keep your loving memories as solace while times are rough.

Life begins with family in the mist
A gentle hug with a loving kiss
expressions of love not yet reciprocated
A Voice, smell and touch now a reality illuminated
nurtured, educated, maturity, just emotionally evolving
Growth, ambition, learning the strengths of problem solving

When things go wrong and we don't understand.
We try to cover up our feelings with another man.
Another flesh to fill the abandoned soul,
What we once had, is now on hold.
Then we wonder sending our thoughts astray,
because it was never suppose to be this way.
So we pray silently amongst ourselves,
and we wonder if this is all that we have left.

When I said that I loved you boy did I lie
I was willing to break up
more than I was willing to try.
Don't be surprised of the words I say
and what you don't know
you'll find out today.
Don't get me wrong but I think it's fair
for me to tell you I just don't care.
There use to be a time when I was very enthused
now it's a matter of time of the new person I'll choose.

How am I doing? Fine might you ask,
more painful things occurring to conjure my past.
Where is your mind? Standing in line,
traveled too far ahead to put the past behind.
What road will you travel? The road that heads right,
I cannot afford to go wrong in this mental fight.
When will you move on? How some would say.
But I've been taking it, day by day.

To remember him is to love him and the thing he had done.
To remember him is to cherish the memories of our fun.
To remember him is to know that he loved me for myself.
To remember him means a lot to me for that is all that I have left.

When I look in the mirror gazing at my reflection
I will always think of you Dad.
I will remember all the people whose hearts you touched and your departure that made us sad.
You were my Dad first, my bestman, my bestfriend
and my first example of a family man.
There were so many things that shouldve crossed your mind
but your families well being was your plan.

I have so many fond memories and thoughts including you
that came rushing through my head,
such memories would break a weaker man
but your strength helps me to look ahead.
I will miss our talks and laughs and I know the cookouts will not be the same,
but I will carry on the tradition in honor of carrying on your name.
So when that dreadful day will come however long it be,
your hard work ethics, family devotion and love for helping others my family will see in me.