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 Mar 2018 hannah
Her
i spent months and months asking myself
why was i not enough for you

was i not thin enough?
was i not pretty enough?
did you want me to change my hair color?
did i laugh too  much?
was my voice too annoying?
were my thighs too big?
was i not smart enough?
was i not domestic enough?
was i not wild enough?
did i not drink enough?
did i not smoke enough?
was i not careless enough?

395 days of me waking up each morning
and having these questions flood my brain
until i fell into bed and everything went black
only when my eyes shut for a few hours
would these questions stop

it has been 395 days of pure hell inside my brain
but i am learning now that it is not that i was not enough
i was too much

i gave you too much love
too much laughter
too much adventure
too much of everything you wanted
that you took complete advantage of

i will be okay

i hope you're happy where ever you are now
we'll all be okay
 Mar 2018 hannah
Her
Hurt
 Mar 2018 hannah
Her
if you take advantage
of someone's weaknesses

that is
n o t
love
 Feb 2018 hannah
Jessica
If you cared enough
You'd see through my scar's
If you cared enough
You'd see my tears beneath the smile
If you cared enough
You'd reach out and not say another word
If you cared enough
You would've stepped in
If you cared enough
You wouldn't have turned your back
If you cared enough
You would've heard my screams
Behind that curtined off wall
If you cared enough
You would have stopped the train in time
Written for a friend of mine who took his life at 13, just because he couldn't accept that he was gay. Rip Jaay
 Feb 2018 hannah
rosecoloredpoet
I hate that I care so much
I hate how much you affect my day
How when you text me I feel alive
but when you are ignoring me the next day I die a little bit inside

Why would you paint such a beautiful  picture in my head
When you know you can't love me back
Your thoughts are still going to a different girl but mine keep holding onto you
How do I do this? We are both hurting but for different lovers

I wish we could work
I wish you would realize that I would give you my world but no you don't care as much as I do I am just a rebound for all you knew
And you know what I hate the most?
I hate that after all you put me through I am still in love with you
 Feb 2018 hannah
victoria
Slice it neater

Deep red
thick wet
dripping to the floor
Head pounding
Memories hounding
Do you want some more?

Cut deeper
Slice it neater
You know what you need
Feel the pain
Memories drain
Body starts to plead

Emotions lifting
Fear sifting
Calmness rears it’s smile
Lost restraint
Feeling faint
Numbness for a while
Not written about myself, I’ve not self harmed in years... written about a character in a film...
 Feb 2018 hannah
EMD
I am tired of my race being degraded
Because others have bought into their stereotypes
Because you know what
I know a ditsy Asian cheerleader,
I also know an Asian ******* the Science team
One part Times at a Chinese restaurant
The other at the local grocery
I know a black man who is kind and caring
And he works at a bank
I know a black man who thinks he’s entitled to my body
With no job, because two hundred years ago
My ancestor hit his with a whip
I know a Mexican girl who was an anchor baby
Her parents came here illegally and made a life for her
They got their cards a little late, she rides horses on the side
I also know a boy’s who’s parents went through all the right channels
Both are jobless and he’s failing every class
I know white kids who are dumber than a box of rocks
Who think they’ll make a living off of video games and ball
I know white kids who try so hard to rise above
The ignorance of the past
So stop degrading me for your ignorance
Do not define me for the stereotype of my race
And I will not define you for the stereotype of yours
Race is not a definition
Nor does it entitle you to a thing

So none of this “reverse racism” crap
Racism is racism
No matter who it comes from
So let me say again
Race is not your definition
Nor does it entitle you to anything
I don’t care what anyone thinks of me for this, it needed to be said.
 Feb 2018 hannah
EMD
some people say
the eyes are the window
to the soul
i have seen windows
with the shades drawn tight
like they’re hiding something inside
i have seen windows
with cracks running both ways
like many stones have been thrown
i have seen windows
deep into haunted houses
like there’s only a ghost of what was
i have seen windows
that belong to ancient homes
like stories untold
i have seen windows
with boxes full of blooms
i have seen windows
that glow gold in the sun
i have seen windows
that belong on a boat
i have seen windows
like stained glass in a church
some people say
that the eyes are the windows to the
Soul
Boxes full of blooms are green, glow gold in the sun is brown, belong on boats are blue, stained glass are hazel/color changing
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