I am who I am
    This is me
      Because if I acted different
         Then it really wouldn’t be me

Time is not

In love

With you

The left side of the pillow is wet
The front of his shirt is wet
Moms purple handkerchief is wet
But I cannot tell you why the tears fall
There is no specific time, date or ambiance for them
They fall continuously
Sometimes when I am standing in front of the stove
Standing in front of the door wondering if I should walk in or walk away
Sometimes they feel cool cascading down my cheeks
Other times hot to the touch and stinging
It’s a relief to spill them
Other times it happens on the spot
Ruining my made-up face
My composure
A splitting headache follows right after
It leaves me feeling weak for a few hours to a few days
Makes me feel cold
A cold I cannot shake off
I have gone to see a doctor or 3
She said its happening because of stress
He said I need more exercise and proper sleep
Ma says its because I have really bad time management skills a husband, a home and homework is tough to handle
Dad thinks its because hubby and I don’t communicate enough
Truthfully, we do but he doesn’t get me
My lips move and the sounds come out
But I feel stupid and more frustrated in the end
He cant put two and two together
He is always busy with his worldly affairs
I stay on my own most of the time
I prefer it that way
I hate crying in front of others
But I am still unable to tell you why

The letters you wrote turned old
all I have is your writing to adore
all I am left with are the messages that were sent
the old abandoned phone
all I see are the smiles that fade
the last minute when you turned pale
on my hand, in my mind
you left your shadow that remains
you left your words embedded so deep
and your teachings are what I still believe
how can I forget?
I have your promises to keep
the photographs I never met
now I see them with a regret
the pages that turned brown
as you turned white
and the time that flew so high
like black birds to the broken sky
your thoughts are so rebel
they escape from my eyes
help me recede away
of these confusing truths
as life has been so abstruse
since the day you left
it roars me at lonely nights
flashes me back to your times
help me recede away
from this empty day , from this empty day.

Remember that old uphill trail
We used to meander along
With matching footsteps
Under the sunlit canopy of leaves
Carving words for each other
On the bark of aged trees
Who may have known
what would become of us
But nevertheless smiled
acted as a blank canvas instead
And watched the moments
Filled with playful laughter
Peachy smiles
Lingering gaze
Warm caress
Unfold lazily between us
The winds of time
May have blown us miles apart
Our footprints may have long eroded
That sunlit canopy may have withered
And we may walk that trail
Only in our dreams
But those words are yet to fade
they were the voice of our soul
Etched into the lap of nature
And as I run my fingers along its rugged edges
I reminisce about you
And hope that wherever you are
You are thinking about me too

Dancing merely along,  my hair blowing in the warmth of the sun,  through the ever green meadow as the softness of grass tickle my bare toes .
This burning bliss of freedom caressing my body like the silken feathers of a swan. Dancing along no worries to hold me down. Closing my eyes , my senses aroused by the sweet scent of  luscious Jasmine in the air.  Nature has it's way of healing our souls, wind blowing the worries from my head, followed by the rain to wash them away, The sunshine comes to dry the rain as the moon awaits another day .