Thinking tonight,
I never thought
Our love could grow
as a living thing,
even in the winter season
I feel that my heart is in spring.
I will love you beyond
the fall of mountains.
and the drying of seas.
I love you,
and through you,
I have more love to give.

said we'd see the world
but soon realized
we'd already seen too much

underwater french kissing
to cope with the pain
of living and dying

our boat's the last thing
to see us off
dunno where it'll crash

face down
our bodies float at sea
lifeless and loveless

I always thought I knew what cologne smelled like.
It was harsh and made my eyes water and nose burn.
All I knew is that my dad wore it religiously.
I always thought my dad wore cologne.
I was ten years old when I learned what whiskey smelt like.

I was sixteen years old when I took my first sip of whiskey.
It was weak, mixed with diet coke, but it still left my throat burning.
I never liked the taste, but when I brought the cup to my nose and smelt the bitterness and I saw the eyes of my father, I knew that the smell was so much worse.
It was that moment when I understood why people drank to forget.

That night I closed my eyes and I saw the black label of Jack Daniels Whiskey, I saw the long brown paper bags that my dad hid in the cupboards, I saw the coke cans littered around our trash can.

I was too young to understand, but with whiskey running through my own veins I connected each individual dot like each sign a constellation.

I set the cup down and winced.
My friends laughed, of course.
They didn’t know.
They’d never even guess.
They probably thought I was a lightweight, a girl who couldn’t even handle a sip of whiskey.
I smiled, too.

I don’t think I’ll ever drink whiskey again.

Why do you feel the need to apologize for taking up space in the world?

Stop saying you are sorry

For existing

For living

For being human

Where do the winds blow
And where did the rain go,
But most of all
Where did my love fall?
And why did he disappear?