Dreaming in ivory she heeded nothing.
The solace rushed through each cell like unalloyed ecstasy.
Evaporating her last sigh, she let go of the agony left viable within.
Life wasn’t absolute anymore, self identity was consumed.
A lifeless corpse with no earthly ties, no human needs.
Decay began having his way with her devoid flesh case.
Life flourishes from blight so gracefully.
What once contained memories and dreams, was now reduced to naught.

People keep thinking,

about their feelings, even --


about their thinking.

I feel them inside my head
Thoughts digging pathways into my brain
Repeating our conversation over and over
And over and over again.

Sentences, turned every direction
Up and down, repeatedly
Breaking apart your every word
Like what did you ~really~ mean?

Panic floods my bloodstream
But after only half of your sentence
I have to remember the second piece too
Then I can breathe again.

Irrationality claws at my heart
Doubt and fear suffocate me
But I want to believe you
I want to believe.

But what if my brain is right?
And what if you're wrong?
I pull reality sharply back into focus
As my thoughts tell me I'm crazy.

Inhale peace and exhale doubt
I have to let go of these questions
I love you, I love you, I love you
One day I'll be able to believe you.

Thoughts spiraling, so endlessly
Spinning me in circles until I'm blind
Back and forth and back again
Until I don't know what's real anymore.
My brain whispers lies like sweet nothings
Telling me we'll never be what I need
That I'm dumb to want you this much
That I'll always be nothing real to you.
Sometimes I know the thoughts are lying
We talk about it and I promise I believe you
But the doubts are convincing too
And you can always find the evidence you look for.
I just want my brain to stop and slow down
I sow the seeds of my own misery along synapses
I can't imagine the strain this puts on your heart too
And I never wanted to cause you any pain.
My brain tells me I should just run away
That leaving could be best for you and for me
But I love you more than I've ever known
And running won't solve anything.
This well-worn path runs deep into my soul
Over and over again, in pain and in fear
I know they're all a part of the same problem
And I promise I'm fighting to find a way through this.

Who is a brain boss?

Who balances his thinkles --


and does really know?

I am a Thinker,

I don't rattle, but I search --


for real vibrations.

It is dangerous

to reflect very deeply:


it is bottomless!

Humanity is in us all,
We care but we sometimes fall,
We must be there for others and stand tall,
Can we be the ones that set up that stall,
Live and breathe humanity,
For we can teach the young,
The song we know can bring happiness when sung,
Believing we can sustain,
Remembering we can refrain,
Humanity's call is amongst us all,
Lets us see it through and repeat the call.

How can I begin to wonder about life further on
when all I see is a poor man continually struggling on
How does a person seek riches when thy neighbor is down on their luck
How can I look towards the years of me without coming unstuck
These shoulders I bare thoughts upon lay heavy full of guilt
To think I once had everything from what once I had built
A fine man I used to be until they came
The people in body armor struck, it was a day of raw emotion and downfall
Of a man with everything who ended with nothing
A life that was but seemed a dream
We die the same with the last tear in our eyes
Oh lord please take me now I am ready to fly.