Pagkatapos ng takipsilim
Bumabalot ang dilim
Ilang oras maninimdim
Ang gabi ay lalalim.

Nag aantay sa iyong pag dating
Naiinip, kung minsan pa'y napapailing
Matagal na ring humihiling
Katotohana'y gusto ka nang makapiling.

Nakasilip na ang haring araw
Hindi pa naman ako bumibitaw
Habang sa mga pangako mo'y ako'y nakadungaw
'Andito pa rin ako, hindi gumagalaw.

Wari ko nga'y ako'y maghihintay
Sa pagibig **** walang humpay
Pusong ginawa nang alay
Sa pagibig **** nakamamatay

Narito pa rin ako, hindi makagalaw wari'y napako na sa pangako **** nakakasilaw.

Pabalik balik ako
Nagiisip kung paano
Ilang araw na ang lumipas
Sa tuwing dilim ako kumukumpas

Mahal paano ko isusulat
Natatakot ako sapagkat
Baka magkulang ang mga salita
Baka hindi sumakto ang titik at letra

Susubukan ko
Kasi ayokong sumuko
Sa pagibig at pagtula
Kasi ikaw, ang ihaharap ko sa tala

Handa naman ako
Sabihin **** languyin ko ang dagat para sayo
Nilangoy ko na upang makarating sayo

People places and things, all fit into categories.
Her her her, my head is filled with allegories.

My heart is a rose.
Petal after petal…
I drop.

I love her.
I love her not.
I love her.
I love her not.

Through the leaves they pluck.

Thorn one; there one goes.
Thorn two; another one froze.

Maybe I have too many thickets.
Maybe I am too pungent.

Maybe they’re allergic.
Maybe they just hate roses.

I have yet to find the one
That will never be done

With me.

Be done with me.

Have I made a mistake by wishing for normality?

Am I wishing to be a lily when in fact I am not?

Thorns in my heart, thorns in my head.
I don’t think they’ll stop ‘till I’m dead.

Poison flows like the Atlantic.
I need help I’m getting frantic.

Another girl, another day.

Another day some part of me leaves.
I do not know what is missing from me.

But I feel like a maze.

A maze of thorns.

When I turn left and go too far
I get pricked.

When I turn right and go too far
I get pricked.

When I go in any direction too far
I get pricked.

I’m traveling blind and I just want to

Be picked.

Want to be picked.

I will beat you
Yes, I have relapsed and probably will again
But I will beat you
I will beat you into the ground so hard, that you will never think of afflicting an innocent twelve year old, like you did me
I am still fighting you
Its been two years, one year of me trying to get better
I wish I could take you on the mat
Beat the living daylights out of you
I should not crave pain
That is not a natural human impulse
But it is now mine
Because of you
If I feel any emotion
You whisper in my ear to _
That is not normal, I know it's not
How do I change it
I try so hard
But you, so often, try harder
I will beat you, _, if it is the last thing I ever do.