"You will find so much better", they say. That the fates have not allowed you to be with that soul, your paths have just crossed but not be wholly intertwine. He had come to your life and left, there must be a sole reason even if you do not know it yet. You are destined for someone greater, someone whose veins sing for your being and for your blood only. All celestial beings he came to knew before would soon be forgotten for you and only you would be his sun and moon. The thought is mesmerizing, unearthly even. To good to be true, but that is what the elders and the wise have promised you. And yet, amidst the promise of destiny and the thought that he was not made for you— you long for him still.

To live in misery
Painting in the dark
The blindness, the desperation of a lonely heart
A worthless plea
A lock with no key
No Windows to the soul
For my dear your eyes are closed
How may I help if invited I'm not
I tried the door sweetheart it was locked
Please don't leave me to freeze
Alone in the dark
Another lonely heart

To my first love.

the one who made me feel important. the one who made me feel cared for. the one who made me realize what it felt like to have someone genuinely want to get to know me. the one who never failed to show me so much affection and care. the one who showed me what mutual love was. and also the one who broke my heart. the one who made me feel the worst betrayal of my life. the one who showed me how disposable a person could be. the one who made me realize words could mean absolutely nothing. the one whose heart changed till i no longer recognize. the one i cried many months for. but also the one who taught me independence. the one who made me realize there's more than just one person i can love wholeheartedly. the one who helped me grow to be the person i am meant to be. the one who made me realize i am strong and fine being all by myself.

i will always love you, you will forever be in my heart.

I was alone on this journey, I thought
till I realised the road was all along with me
hugging my feet to ease my steps
as I strode homeward.

We travelled together
like two lonely souls who met to become soulmates.

Me and the mystical road, we
kept travelling,
I, oblivious to the home I already reached!

i want to live with you.
in a house in the suburbs or in an apartment in the city. i want to wake up and see you next to me, knowing that i am no longer alone throughout the dreary and isolated nights. i want to feel you next to me, to feel your chest rise and fall delicately, to harmonize our breaths in unison. i want to feel your warmth radiate onto me. i want to see you in your most peaceful state, covered in sun that comes through the window. i want to go out and buy groceries, then come home to cook for us. i want to share my shower with you, and i want to carry all of your children. i want to share early mornings and late nights with you. i wish to create a home with you, to let our love flourish within the walls we call ours. i want you by my side when i experience the little things that happen so subtly, yet are remembered for a lifetime.

i want be alive with you.
i want to live like there’s no tomorrow with you. i want to feel the rush of adrenaline or to be stuck in awe in moments that captivate us. and in moments of trouble, i want to know that you will be there so i won’t have to face anything alone. i want to see the world and be caught in it’s action with you. i want to go to France or to Italy to be immersed in the culture with you. i want to see you in your complete ecstasy, to see you feeling just as alive as i do when i am around you. i want to be caught up in your euphoria and jubilation. i want you to take my hand so i can take your name. and as the years start wind down and today begins to feel just like yesterday, i want you to be there, having been through it all. i want to grow old and recollect on our effervescent youth, and wish to do it all over again.

“the rise, and the fall. living life with someone, and being alive with someone. it’s a broad topic and feeling that can only be defined by two words: true romance.
now tell me, have you ever had that?”