She cries during ***,
in an attempt to express & address,
this set of collective regrets that’ve been suppressed,
ever since when she was first undressed & no one confessed,

I let her vent, give her room & hold space so she can process,

I suggest she take some deep breaths instead of stress,
still has some emotions left so I guess in a sense she’s blessed,
in a world that’s gone cold & everyone seems possessed,
people stumbling around like zombies in The Walking Dead,

no Norman Reedus or Andrew Lincoln features though,
just an aborted fetus & a broken heart seeking treatment,
which explains why she’s always willing to give guys a try,
& stay with them faithfully even when she’s mistreated,
& I’m willing to be crucified for the actions of other guys,
so I take her torment away & transform it like Jesus,
bare the weight of her loss like a cross then write the moments,
releasing the feelings in books since I’m a poet not a preacher,

not here for the heroics,
or other crowning moments or admirable achievements either,
so I’m on the down-low drinking hoping to go unnoticed,
at a bar on a barstool with a babe so hot I’ve got a fever,
we’re both discrete because we both need ****** healing,
& I promise her I’ll be here for her & not leave her,

until I get assassinated like Abe Lincoln at a theatre,

but she doesn’t believe the things I say about loyalty,
because she’s been betrayed before so she’s not too eager,
but hey I can’t blame her if I’d been through what she has,
I probably wouldn’t be eager to believe me either,
pause this’s getting too intense it’s time for an intermission,
I need to take a break so I can take a breather,

in a real life Soap Opera drama live on stage in Life’s theatre,
caught up in all the rawness of these women’s feelings,
one minute she’s laughing the next minute she’s crying,
she apologizes & I say she never has to apologize for feeling,

or make excuses to me or anyone else for her feelings,
I mean at least she still feels things,

even when those feelings open wounds that need healing,
lays her head one my shoulder, says she’s been ***** before,
so when I go rough in the sack with her she gets flashbacks,
& it’s hard to face facts that relate to what’s happened before,

I tell her it’s okay I tell her I’ll go slow we can take our time,
I tell her it’s ok to stay she’s safe, she can tell me anything,
I tell her sometimes it helps to open up & communicate,
but she just clams up & doesn’t say a thing,

so I get up to go shower,
to try & wash off the stress,
moments later she comes in & joins me,
somewhere between sedated & upset,

at a hotel somewhere in America,
a hotel they call boutique,
but it all feels haunted & a bit spooky if you ask me,
the wind howls, the windows rattle, & all the floors creak,

so I can’t help but get the creeps,
because this hotel feels more than just a little like me,
all dressed up nice, hip trendy on the outside,
but inside everything’s not at all what it seems,

haunted from the drama of these girls that were abused,
then used *** to transfer that abusive dark energy onto me,
which I guess I kinda deserve because I used to serve,
this sort of abuse to girls who were into me sexually,

you get what you give this is exactly what karma is,
so now I’m trying to help heal the Collective Feminine,
from all the damage that’s been previously done over lifetimes,
by the overly aggressive actions of the Collective Masculine,

so go ahead smash your conflicts into me I’m begging you,
drown me in the ocean of the tears of your traumas,
scream shout let it all out until there’s nothing left to let go of,
& I will still love you continually no menopause or commas,

I will always love you unconditionally continually,
no mental pauses or parental dramas,
you have been hurt before but you still have worth for sure,
no one’s pure but at least you’re honest & willing to work on it,

& it’s an honor to be here to hear & be your platform,
for you to express your regrets until there’s nothing left,
you are an incredible creation resilient & brilliant,
you’re worth it we’re out here when distressed I’ll be your outlet,

so you can vent the stress as you process,
even if part of that process involves crying during ***,
you’re worth it I’m here to hear everything you express,
a Living Light in this world of The Walking Dead,

so it’s totally okay to cry during *** go ahead,
especially if it’s an attempt to express & address,
the set of collective regrets that’ve you’ve suppressed,
ever since you were first undressed & no one confessed,

I’ll let you vent give you room
& hold space so you can process…

∆ LaLux ∆

from THHT3: The Hollywood Hills Trilogy 3
available worldwide.

If you enjoyed the poem message me directly and I'll send you a link so you can have the Kindle version of the book for FREE.

Stuck inbetween Love & Lust
But I actually want it to Last
Far From You I feel Lost
Tell me; is this Love Or Lust

I love it when you whisper
In my ears
Your ***** little twister
I hear

I want you to draw me
near
And put away all the
Fears

Legs wrapped around your waist
All  fears
Chased and disgraced
Is this love or lust?

I want it to be a
Fling
But you want it to be a
Thing

My Lustful desires I
Inclined
But Your Heart was
Blind

You want it to be a
Thing
But I want it to be a
Fling

Is this love or Lust?
    ☆D.D☆

She left me,
dancing as she disappeared under the faded street lights,
I stood there,
watching shirtless as she faded in the street’s night,

I’m sensing a pattern,
one I desperately deserve,
I fall in love and hit the ground,
my heart landing on the curve,

I’m trying to become a better man,
I don’t want to feel cliche,
I don’t want to try and ******,
every girl that comes my way,

I love women,
and I respect them,
and if I respect them,
I should also respect their wishes,

it’s my responsibility,
just as much as it is hers,
to exercise self control,
especially when arousal occurs,

sure,
she is **** as the hottest a Goddess could ever be,
and sure,
I am ***** as the must turned on man could ever me,

but I am better than the physical desires that pulsate though my body,

I’m trying to become a better man,
I don’t want to feel cliche,
I don’t want to try and ******,
every girl that comes my way,

gave two massages just today,

the first one to a girl that has a boyfriend,
she told me she was sick of feeling objectified,
she just wanted some attention,
without being looked at like an object by every guy,

so I gave her a massage and even reached her inner thighs,

but I did not cross that thin lustful line,

I respect her too much,
to try and take advantage of her lowered defenses,
I will not be like almost every other man,
and try and get into almost every girls *******,

I love her so much more than ***,
and I crave moments alone where we can be intimate,
but I’m on another level elevated from the simple man,
I am in love the soul of the woman not just what’s inside her pants,

and so after the massage was done,
I put her clothes back on,
as respectfully as I’d taken them off,
and she thanked me with her blessing,

saying she’d see me tomorrow,
and that she appreciated me not trying to get in her pants,
and her grateful compliment was better than any ***,
well not any but still better than *** followed by abandonment,

and then she went,
and then I saw,
a girl that shared the same birthday was me,
who was/is an artist as well,

I invited her up to my room,
she initially was hesitant,
I told her I understood her skepticism,
she told me she was a feminist,

I told her my last girlfriend’s best friend was a lesbian,

soon enough though she was in my room where my massage commenced,

with her too I was controlled,
even though I took off her clothes,
and massaged most of her body thoroughly,
I avoided that red line that lies just before the danger zone,

coconut oil jasmine and ylang ylang,
helped smooth out all her tension,
and I told her if anything I was doing hurt her,
to please bring it to my attention,

I was just grateful,
to be able to be intimate,
with a girl who I found attractive,
and who may well have been my artistic equivalent,

an emotional exhibitionist both infinitely limitless and honestly uninhibited,

and so it went,
until we were lying in each others auras,
I guess sometimes you have to spend it all,
in order to attain the ultimate fortune,

to be able to share space and time with someone without any wanting,

one thing I can say is that moment felt like forever and a day in the best way,

though soon she was going,
I wanted to debate and ask her to stay,
but I promised not to protest if she was being honest,
so instead I helped her get her clothes back on her lengthy frame,

walked her down the well polished wooden stair case,
and to my hotel’s golden spiked front gate,
then I walked her down the long driveway,
to where the private road meets the main roadway,

and then she left me,
dancing as she disappeared under the faded street lights,
I stood there,
watching shirtless as she faded in the street’s night,

I’m sensing a pattern,
one I desperately deserve,
I fall in love and hit the ground,
my heart landing on the curve,

I’m trying to become a better man,
I don’t want to feel cliche,
I don’t want to try and ******,
every girl that comes my way…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆