I say when I wake up,
And pain is all I feel.
Running through me like a current,
From my head down to my toes.
First there's the pain in my head,
Banging ******* that big 'ol drum,
When I go to move,
Here it comes!
My bones they burn in anger,
Putting up a fight,
'Wanna move?' It says,
'Ain't gonna happen!
Gonna keep you awake all night!
Gonna turn on the pain in your body,
So that with every move you make,
I'm there to remind you,
Your life I'm gonna take!'
'So you think you wanna live normal?
Get up, go to work and have fun?
That's what you think!
Gonna make sure you can't even run!
Make sure you have pain to remind you,
That I'm there,
Just waiting to jump!
Jump out when you least expect it!'
'Why?' I ask,
'What have I done?
I've been kind, been good and been thoughtful,
Given love to everyone.
Helped others that really need it,
Been there, for everyone.
So why when at last I'm happy,
Is there pain to stop all my fun?
GO AWAY!' I tell you,
'GO TO HELL, you've got the wrong one!'
I will fight you with every breath in my body,
Push you down till I feel you no more.
Send you back to the land filled with fire,
Squash you down,
Pound you into the floor!
'WANT MY LIFE BACK,
Gonna get it,
You son of a gun!
Don't think that you're gonna stop ME!
Cos this time,
Listen hard, can you hear me?
THIS TIME YOU PICKED THE WRONG ONE!'
I think this poem says it all really! Most of my days start like this and in truth can stay like it all day. Writing really does help me focus and push out those negative thoughts and feelings in preparation for a productive day ahead.... hopefully!