I felt it first –
the day we wore waterproof boots in Amsterdam in August,
an unexpected storm did little to disturb us
I began to notice it then
the secret in this town that everyone, except me, knew about

Something that was hushed and passed around
under the blanket of moon
hidden away in a fiercely dark room of the Red Light
beneath maroon velvet curtains and leather-topped stools
or nestled beneath a bridge on the black canal past midnight.

I saw water dotted with blurred droplets, dark blue
the reflection of milky streetlights.
I pull the curtains in the mezzanine and the show begins
on the street below. I look out.

A curve of the lips
a gentle folding of the arms
a hand brushing against another

A secret never told
A city more alive than awake.

our skin so delicate, so crude
we lie; beside each other & to each other
two tempered minds, wounded skins on the Amsterdam skinny bridge
letting the night to devour us into the darkness of its sky
hurt, tapered, and used
but we still are news
to each of our owns

I spend my summers in Amsterdam

Everyone rides bikes

The girls all wear short skirts

The wind blows and all the girls ride by with their ***** in the air

I sit outside the cafes and watch the bikes go by

It's five am in Amsterdam
Far away from where I am
I close my eyes
Let out a sigh
And pretend I'm there again

Look at you; a carved beauty.
How patiently were you made?
Did you know the star cries for you?
Did you know the skies bend to you?
Are you lonely?
To be at such height no one dares attempt.
To be burning so beautifully.
To be fire.
To be the lion of everyone's heart.

I'm lonely too. But of a different kind.
You're alone at being perfect.
I'm lonely to be the thing you don't want to ****.

Monet was painting up my vision
while the droves were driven out.
We stepped out to the derision
of a tenor waterspout.

The town outside is dancing
in the ruddy neon hues
and I’m ****** whilst Amsterdam-ing
by the slam-dunk cognac blues.

And a cap was shaking coppers
in an out cove by the way,
where instruments and owners
had begun to play.

The bar stools are all swaying
whilst the festival ensues,
and I’m ****** whilst Amsterdam-ing
by the slam-dunk cognac blues.

With the rhythm of the rimjhim
and the stamping our feet
we sing our drunken-whim hymn
whilst we stagger down the street.

And we had sunken five; still sinking
Im strung out, slammed, and stinking
Four sheets to the wind and freaking
about what I had to lose.
so that’s when I got to thinking
had an inkling to the linking
between my errant drinking
and the slam-dunk cognac blues…