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 Oct 2014 Summer Lee
Tupelo
Dear Brother,

Sorry again for all you been through
these past few months,
I know my skin got a lot to apologize for.
That book you recommended I finished last week,
never hated myself more because of it.
Have you ever wondered what it would be like
to live without reflections?
How blissful that would be.
 Oct 2014 Summer Lee
CP Walker
Brushed my teeth--the final task--so now it's safe to rest;
Wipe my feet--forgot this last--go climb into my nest.

I hate the corny daily slew that pops up on my screen;
Alternatively *****, just feign some truth, that tops the trending scene.

Write it down, type it out, spit it for the dogs and ponies;
Might turn out ripe or spout: a pit that bogs down phonies.

Either way, I really hate this routine...especially the parts where we meet in it.
Popcorny culture push, hadanuffadat
I thought about it for a while
Before I did it
Because I didn’t know how
I kept glancing at the scissors sitting
On my study table
Thought to get up to grab them
To hold its blade against my bare skin
In my mind I could feel the pain
Of what it would be like
Maybe it was because I was so hurt
And I just wanted to hurt others
The way they hurt me
So I rose from my bed
But I walked out the door
Walked into the bathroom
Opened the cabinet with aspirin
I counted them by fives as I took them
Ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five
Was it enough?
I walked back to my room
Slowly with hands still shaking,
And body trembling.
I pushed under the covers
And slowly dozed off to sleep.
The next morning would come
But I wouldn’t wake up
Everyone would yell from my bedroom door
But I wouldn’t move
They’d come to shake my cold body
And realize the difference
Between what I was and
What I am.
The morning sunshine broke
Through my window sill
And I slowly lifted my eyelids
It didn’t work.
Maybe it wasn’t enough
So maybe
I'll just have to try again tonight.
You have covered your tracks
And were ridiculously efficient about it.
Therefore, I cannot send you to court
And get the justice that I deserve
But when you get all old and grey
I will not pretend to hurt.
If you put a gun to your head
And blow out all your brains
I will not act as though
I feel any pain.
Should you take a handful of pills somewhere along the way
I would not be surprised, dear
But from me, you would not see a tear
If you were to stop your heart from beating
With a dagger and a pen
I would not agonize over your loss but, rather
Be more at ease instead.
So should your life be taken tonight
Do me a favor, **** your memory too
But should you remain living, sweetie
I'd rather die than be with you.
The scars.
I am covered in them.
The burns
The cuts
The scratches
The bruises
The peeled off  flesh and nails.
They are my t r e a s u r e s.
They show all of the battles inside of my head that I have lost.
They show all of the anger, pain, depression, envy, remorse, guilt, shame, insanity, emptiness, boredom, and tiredness I feel.
They show all of the words I am afraid to say.
They hold all of the I l o v e yous, I h a t e yous, I n e e d yous, and I feel
your p a i n s that I am afraid to even t h i n k at times.
They peek out from underneath my clothing and they rub against everything, reminding me that I am indeed alive and that I am indeed h u m a n.
They show all of the times I've screamed
Been alone
Been scared
Cried
Wanted to die
Had no one to be there
Wanted to stab someone and bash their brains in
Wanted to d i s s a p e a r into t h i n  a i r
Even though they remind me of some of the awful memories,
Being reminded of these memories and the lessons I have learned only makes me
s t r o n g e r
Whatever cruel entity, god, goddess, deity of any kind, gave me this cruel life thank you
You have made me wise
You make me think about how I am not the only person with these problems and how others have worse
But also *******  y o u for hurting so many innocent people and corrupting their
o n c e  p u r e  m i n d s
I will live with my scars and probably add more but I will always think of the cruel fates of others and how cruel the world truly is.
I will think of how grateful I am to have lived and how grateful I am to have not have gotten worse than what I have.
Thank you, you ******* life for showing me the right path
©LogenMichel copyright 2014
 Oct 2014 Summer Lee
paper boats
Humanity's womb is barren
The music has died away
We ***** our children
Lead them astray.
Change marched through the streets
As they lay littered and free
For these corrupt eyes to see.
For these corrupt eyes to see.
How we bled for peace
And we killed for peace
But peace was power
And power was peace
How we bled for peace
And we killed for peace
*Now our blood drowns us.
-Our greatest punishment is that we crave change, and yet it is futile-
 Oct 2014 Summer Lee
CC
Music
 Oct 2014 Summer Lee
CC
I wonder if cats care for music
Because their meows are so emotional
I wonder if I need to listen to what you're saying
Because I hear you and the melody sounds rad
I need music
Music needs fans
I need music
It puts me in the zone
Thoughts that make sense
The air feels so dense
Swallowing air
I've never felt more intense
The feelings are driving me home
I can't believe you're from this world
Because I've always felt like an alien soul
Something tells me
Someday I'll meet you
Listening to Spooky Couch
I was hoping there was an alternative universe
where "I Love You" is good enough.
But I've already seen the entire solar system in the round bones of your spine.
the ride through space is tough, You and I could lay down and enjoy a glass of whine. You don't need to share feelings.
I'll just lay awake at night telling love stories to the ceilings.
wishing there was an alternative universe where promises had meaning.
And I'm leaning against the false hope that I could be an astronaut
and discover a loving alien who's everything you're not.
And we could live Happily on our own star.
Where I'd lay awake wishing he was less of what you aren't and more of what you are.
I love you for you and there's nothing that I'd change
I still love you with a smile, I still love you full of rage.
I thought, Maybe in an alternative universe
We could rehearse my dreams without a stage.
But this isn't a play.
there are galaxies  in your eyes
And there's nothing I can do or say
absolutely nothing, I just can't make you stay.
You really are a great actor, one of the great few
I mean there for a second, You had me believing you


© copyrighted Nicole Ann Osborn
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