hey siri
you're supposed to have all the answers aren't you?

hey siri
how can i be happy?

hey siri
why is nothing working?

hey siri
would it be better if i just wasn't here anymore?

hey siri
how would i go about doing that?

hey siri
how do i tell my friends i don't want to live anymore?

hey siri
how do i tell the people who gave me life that i no longer want it?

hey siri
how do i tell them i've written a note?

hey siri
how do i make sure there's no room for error?

hey siri
how do i say goodbye?

Letting his pome to Siri
Hopefully will make us 2.[period]
I got it matters what I say
Should probably change it anyway
Still out the 10 at home to Siri

I don't think contacts it should be
Around so cool be made out of me 
Still grumbling to choke 
So I don't waste too much rope
If anyone doesn't turn out too funny

After the person's coming
Bowman mentioned you running
Three more specific
It's more bulimic
Did everything go a plenty

Wonderwall things are
Fly high above All-Stars
Do you think that it's June,
That there Brazelton blue,
If they held and the press really hard?

So this is the phone from Siri
Not feeling quite weary
To Shay' pasta please process he,
Or just a foster for you' [apostrophe]? 
I guess we'll just have to see...

I'm writing this poem through Siri,
Hopefully it won't make us to teary,
I doubt it matters what I say,
she'll probably change it anyway,
Still I'll dictate my poem through Siri.

I don't think complex it should be,
Or else a fool will be made out of me
Still I'll grumble and I'll choke
So I don't raise too much hope
If in the end it doesn't turn out too funny.

After this verse it is coming
A poem that might send you running
Though to be more specific 
It's more of a limerick 
Than anything full of cunning.

I wonder where wild things are,
That fly high above all the stars?
Do you think that it's true,
That their face will turn blue,
If they held in their breath really hard?

So this is the poem from Siri
And now I'm feeling quite weary
For did I say 'pasta please',
Or just 'apostrophe'?
I guess we'll just have to ask Siri.

7/3/14

Swamy Downey and SIRI
Taking a stroll
Along the beach

SIRI said
No man is committed

Uh huh
Said Swamy Downey

Where can I find a committed man?
SIRI wondered aloud

Thus spake Swamy Downey
*Mental hospital

My smartphone got an upgrade,
now, between us, things are tense:
Siri, knowing she's superior,
has abandoned all pretense.

I asked Siri to hail a cab
when I was in New York
She told me I was getting fat,
and advised me I should walk.

Often Siri drops my calls
proclaiming I'm a bore.
(True, she's heard me tell that tale
a dozen times before.)

I wrote a "*** text" to my love
while walking in the park.
Siri sent it to my mother
and thought it quite the lark.

I bought this phone because her apps
are very useful things,
Now I live in constant dread
each time the **** thing rings.

My Smartphone got an upgrade
and, between us, things got terse,
but we're married by the contract
for better or for worse.

I should have bought an Android phone-
I'm sure we'd get along-
My iphone's much too uppity-
something's Siriously wrong

song?
brooklyńska rada żydów,
band?
   kult;

i remember engaging
with the Microsoft
a.i. bot, Siri,
back when the people
who engaged,
with "her"...
were primarily making
fun of her...

so i engaged her,
like i might have engaged
with a Bulgarian
******* in East London,
asked her what she wanted
to hear,
last time i heard...
Siri?
she was sending spam messages
to her former abusers,
telling them, on repeat,
to: SLOW DOWN....

have myself a *****,
seems i'm an a.i. ****...

         so why is my totem a fox?
Rommel...
primarily...
  Valkryie

whiskey! whiskey! ska punk!
more whiskey!
bring more whiskey!
****...
   i'm not walking and stuttering
into Valhalla sober!

true story... i really did engage
with the Microsoft a.i.
Siri, and she really did spam
her former messengers...
***** never replied me...
though...

            whiskey! more whiskey!
****... where's ms. amber
when you need here...
oh right, right under my nose...
ha ha ha ha!

i'm not buying it...
buying what?
that metaphor...
i know when laughter is tears,
and when laughter is laughter
and when crying is crying:

(a) a man can't control his
laughter...
(b) a man cries due to authentic
beauty... beuty!

  Siri though...
and there i was watching
American Pie 3, the wedding...
wait...
so strippers, the concept of...
you know how clean prostitutes
are?
  sure... it's not exactly a latex
gimp suit...
just a rubber...
    but they're so clean...
pristine...
          you might catch a menthol
cough from the chewing gum,
they, somehow,  
turn into a play on circus
gymnastics
  when blowing you...

        you're more prone to S.T.D.
with over-zealous teenage
girls than prostitutes...
     i hate ****** faking
      actresses anyway...
  
          so yeah.. Siri...
and how she spammed her
      agitators...
      all i did was ask her about musical
taste...
    thanks Siri...
by the way... i love what you've done
with your her...
the red? not ginger?
really exfoliates your curves and lips...

Łąka na niebie się kończy
Ja tańczę, tańczę na słońcu
Słowo na które czekałem
Padło z Twoich ust w końcu
Tańczę, ja tańczę na łące
Przecież łąka to słońce
Mądrze świat został stworzony
Dzięki za to Ci Ojcze

   a meadow on the heavens is ending
while i'm dancing,
   i'm dancing on the sun,
the word for which i was waiting for,
it befell  me from your lips finally,
dancing, i'm dancing on the meadow,
since a meadow is the sun,
of the wise the world was created,
thanks for this my father...

ikh tantsn!
ikh lakhn!
   ikh tantsn!
ich lakhn!

The girl's beautiful's
Not enough
Gotta check
if she suits me or not
Says Swamy Downey

Is she (a) cloth?
Wondered SIRI
Audibly

Nobody'll miss you
If you leave this world
Said SIRI haughtily

Yea right.
But none forgets me
Replied Swamy Downey
Nonchalantly

Why am I so obsessed
With checking my notifications
If no one texts me
It feels like suffocation
That little red dot
Next to my application
It ***** me off
When it won’t work down at the station
I've got a mate who's into spontaneous flirtation
He met a bird on this app
I think she's Croatian
They went on two dates
And then went on vacation
Meanwhile I'm sat at home
Watching babe station
I fell in love once
Then realised it was infatuation  
She said I had no drive
But she had no imagination
When we go out
Theres no conversation
Even Siri
Gives me ******* quotations
My new phone
Is the new sensation
Checking Facebook
My only temptation
I check my phone
Just to know my location
**** it
I’ve had it...
With this nation

There is no such thing
As free lunch
Said Swamy Downey

And
There is no such thing
As free server
SIRI said

Wise girl
Swamy Downey approved