i see your silence
in barren branches
on winter trees,
grabbing at the
would you please perform a quick
procedure•one that could rid me of the
decay•it's slowly eating it's way down to
my core•a little bit at a time, each and every
day•please...please...won't you take a look•i
can't see but i can feel•it spreading through
every cranny, every nook•it won't stop till
it's had its fill•will you...........please...please
do something•before i get ripped apart
•but look not at my teeth
or in my mouth•
because i think i
may need a
R O C A
*on my heart...
Style inspired by a friend.
1. how long have i been awake?
2. my eyes are heavy from witnessing the same ****,
3. like i’m stuck in a cursed time loop of desolation,
4. but i’m more than scared to close them for i might stumble upon the ending of my unfinished dreams and decide to not open them anymore
5. how long have i been like this?
6. i hum a good song in my head to silence the thought of entirely giving up
7. hoping that a perfect rhythm and melody is enough to imprison the horrifying memories that’s been living in the corner of my mind for too long
8. i wish that i hold more words to tell my truth
9. and that my body is strong enough to handle its aftermath
10. i wish that i still have time to witness the sunrise
11. even if every time i breathe –
12. i feel myself fade away
Varying degrees of self hatred
Effortlessly breaking me down
Making me doubt
Everything we ever were
Let me be
Or learn to grow
Existing in solitude is what I do best
There's an impossibility standing adjacent to the nearest star bound body
It waves and beckons with a sincere familiarity so unnaturally
I am the end of the undulating tunneled vision
I am become a silhouette of a dead city caught in the decaying story bones fiction
We are all emptiness and our emptiness is how we define ourselves.
But our emptiness will become a river into which we will find the world to be held.
The universe exists in the eyes of those who live without the sight to see
Those breathing, freezing stars that burn into the heart buried deep.
Constructs of will and portions of strength cut out the guilt of my youth
All roads lead to the sky but I will not seek to understand you
Futures are made in blinks and beats
Are they aware of the way we lay with our tangled feet under these threadbare sheets?
Follow the light of my darkness
A single shot of whiskey and a conversation whisks away my heart's hardness
All cool and breezy across the great green oceans
I'll meet you halfway between loss and a facsimile of dreamed emotions
I've become a shell
of bittersweet memories &
that weighs much more
than I can bear.