He locked her in the room
Locked her childhood with it too
Locked her laughter and silliness
All together just with his ‘manliness’

Tell me, oh tell me,
What so did the little girl do?
That you have to dig out her purity
and exchange it with insecurity?

I made you my religion
The definition of me
I saw you in my reflection
but you ran off with him.
those days I’d sit in front of
your picture
and pray for your arms around
me.
I’d wrap myself around a cup of coffee
my imagination of your being.

My heart
drums in my chest
so hard it
                 aches
The feeling you get
on the first real day of autumn,
the air crisp,
leaves falling at the edges,
wind smelling vaguely of smoke.
the end and the beginning
of something
All At Once.

There is a room in my brain
with boxes like Russian dolls
each a memory of your lies
your flaws
your name is hidden
in the smallest boxes of them all.

I keep you in there,
to keep me sane out here
but it’s memories of me cannot lock up
the betrayal of a mind which lingers on
my
head
on
your
shoulder
My
fingers
intertwined
around
yours
Our laughter. Our love.
It still bothers me
How I got over the idea of you
But not the idea of us

I learnt
Every cell in your body
Is replaced
After
S E V E N years

It relieved me
it satisfied me
to know
In S E V E N years
My body
will be
Washed
from your
T O U C H.