I used to write
about women,
looking in the mirror, peering
out from behind the bars of these walls.

I used to see them
in the kitchen,
by the stove, seated:
docile at the table. Their chairs
were always a little
askew--drawn back--
or maybe they just weren't there.

They'd wash--no scrub--
their hands among the dishes
until their manicures bled.
Then they'd stack the porcelain
in a heap out by last night's
******* and tomorrow's
cleaning.

Sometimes they'd smile
to themselves; a chuckle of menial
labor. But other times they'd cry
and groan and moan out the next
generation of household
women. I used to see
them everywhere. I wonder where
they've gone.

Limbs intertwined isn't enough,
For this kind of twisting vine.
Where substance is the water,
To this fertilized soil.

Forming cracks from the lick,
Of dry desert sunlight.
Where once a great lake roamed,
But was used up in his youth.

Orange warmth felt nice,
Until it turned everything brown.
The lush vine died without the lake,
And the sun had no one to entertain.

Behind the curtain
Before the crowd
Beyond the music
Above my fear
Beside my partner
Among the lights
Around we go
Through my soul
Without a sound
Despite the world
Together we dance

this is an ending

i'm dancing to my swan song
in a room of unlit candles

restless shadows dance despite the
absence of hollowed light

i am so alone yet not
abandoned

my spirit is still
but my body is crying

for my aching heart that is
tired of dying

the californian ******* will keep me up
but i can't keep up with this bluff

oh i am drunk on your spirit
spiritdrunk, spiritdrunk, spiritdrunk

I'm laying here staring into the void,
The stars are harsh spectators.
Vast, cold nothingness reaches into me.
Prickly fingers grip my heart.

I'm bitterly  grateful for the familiarity,
It's nice to remember the pain.
A noose on my neck, a vice  in my gut.
Love has come to collect.

I remember the crossroads, the deal we made.
The glorious shining love,
That glow shined in all of the dark places,
Then we saw the ***** corners.

We saw the murk, polluted wells, fecund fields.
The glorious shining love,
it was no longer pure, it couldn't support us.
It splintered and blew us to pieces.

I lay here alone again, and I feel the darkness,
Embracing the black void again.
I reach into myself for the warmth of the light.
I feel the salty wet memories on my face.

Even the pain is  a glorious price for love.