i sometimes wish there was a war coming
it is selfish
it is foolish
but that's what i long for

i wish there was a war coming
so i wouldn't have to study
i wouldn't have to work
i wouldn't have to love

i wish there was a war coming
so there would only be worry
so there would only be hushed voices
silent stares in the night
and death and selfless sacrifice

i wish there was a war coming
so i could flee or fight
i could be a hero, a coward
i could be honest at last

i wish there was a war coming
so peace could settle to my heart.

IN tombs of gold and lapis lazuli
Bodies of holy men and women exude
Miraculous oil, odour of violet.
But under heavy loads of trampled clay
Lie bodies of the vampires full of blood;
Their shrouds are ****** and their lips are wet.

"Stop, don't feel that," I think sharply;
As though I can control mind and
Heart-what a joke, it's like catching
Salt from a pile of sprinkled sand.
"I'm in love," I snide from within,
Yet the pressure boils steady
And I can't help but yearn in such
Overweighing, cold agony.
"Don't look"- my eyes dart straight to him
While the guilt overflows my chest,
Setting the butterflies ablaze,
A raging fire in this mess
That I created at first sight.
"He isn't anything you like,"
I try but I know it'll fail;
It's true but this attraction's spike
Still cuts through like a sharpened blade.
"You love him more and he loves her",
Despite the honesty it held,
The reality was ******.
He has his troubles with his love
And although feelings might be on
One side, this emotion can't be
Shaken; innocence has foregone.
Two options remain: wait and see
Or shut my eyes and feel it bleed.

I know that you're made of alot of broken pieces,
Just like a mosaic.
Mosaics are beautiful and colorful,
Just like you.

an unsettled gap between my stomach and back
a nerving tone of voice
is what my dad has.

my dads insufficient ways to encourage church
included yelling, guilt tripping, and personal traps
is some of his pestering crap.

church is a lovely place of gathering
though if you believe
that's one thought bubble
I'd like to leave .

I stopped believing after he pestered me for years
his brainwashing cycles
needed a clean.

it's my life
particularly my dream

you can control my birth
what I eat
the rules of the family

but not my beliefs...

Girl. If you were as close as
You could, those would not be the
Covers of your bed against you.

You'd wonder how many arms
I had; you'd ask how something
Could so hold you.

That is how close I would be.
Between your skins.
Within your withinnermost.

I would find you. I would dig
Until I found you; separate you;
Open your smile to mine.

See you seeing me seeing you as
As naked as anything without
Anything; final, final self.

That pillow; my arm. That pillow;
My other. That cover is not from
Feathers; I envelope you with

My ownership of the bed we lay
Upon, if I must. I claim what I
Crave; your rest. Rest.

Look me in the eyes while you taste me
your head moving in shallow dips
I feel your tongue descending slowly
a prelude to your throat and lips

your eyes begin to water
your mouth now fully wet
breaths only come in gasps
as I delve in deeper yet

"That's a good girl"
"Show me what your mouth is for"
your lips curl in an obstructed half-smile, eyes pleading for air
but the sounds coming from your throat, say so much more

I grab your hair by the fistfull
firmly holding your head in place
I watch your face become  flushed-red
With each pump of hips and waist


You always look like you belong
below on bended knee
you blush then smile so innocently
As you swallow what's left of me

your eyes look to me for approval
I feel their lustful burn
my smile says "you've been a good girl
and soon, very soon, it'll be your turn"

Two galaxies colliding, you and I
I felt your gravity draw me in
the moment I saw you and we kissed our hellos
My boundaries blurred by your lips

Our union may have been
an anomaly of probability  but
our pieces fell into place like
a mosaic of paradox & unspoken wishes

One day death will come and this world
fashioned from our stardust will
expand and contract, until the weight
of our love forces it to collapse

Our final kiss will give birth to
distant stars that shine in our memory and
the waves of light bouncing from your face to mine
will  become flower and soil

One blooming and the other sustaining
because nothing ever truly dies
our whole will always be greater
Than the sum of our broken hearts