everyone has a heart
and someone special inside it
but I am not the one
inside her heart
instead of blood
regret flows through mine
but my heart still filled
with her
not like blood
but like a clot
which builds up
even though it hurts
I refuse to see the doctor
self medications
won’t work
as my heart still longs for her
and refuses to mend
for many years these clots have grew
now all over my heart
in every artery and vien
waiting for one day
to give me one big final
heartache

sunflowers bloom, sun shines
holding hands together, her head on my lap
as these moments pause, ignoring all her flaws
as she smiles with her eyes filled with 1000 daises
as her cheeks become red, she shines brighter than stars
nightingales jealous of her voice
vision blinded by love, memories filled with her
in this world filled with darkness she’s my only light

I see her in school some times
no lipstick, no fancy clothes
even in these boring uniforms
dim lit lights and stressed minds

her face shines
like the necklace she always wears
her presence
brings warmth like class’s fav teacher

when I hear her laughs
the school turns into an orchestra
I go to school everyday
not because I study well
just to see her
to get lost in her eyes one last time

outside the chauffeur waits for her
while I run behind the bus
heard that she has traveled the world
while I struggle to visit a nearby hill

she’ll never love me
I won’t stop loving her till I die

when I’ll have enough money
I’ll buy not some luxury gifts
but a bouquet of flowers and a book

As it’s because of her
I write
I feel love
I want to live

late night thoughts
not allowing me to sleep
deep enough to weep
instead of water
my face is covered in blood

body tucked in warmest sweater
still I somehow feel the cold
cold air seeping through
the gaps I never noticed
they were closed when we hugged

her pictures make me a little warm
she makes blood flow in my heart
instead of poison
but am reminded about her absence
as I bleed only poison

her face was the sun, light
now covered by these clouds
I try to find solace knowing
that the sun is still shining
on someone who is fortunate

rumours about me
stab me harder than reality
their words feel like am being
cut by diamonds that never mends
my real name even I have forgot
*******, loser, ugly face
I have got used to

dreams crashing faster than light
credit card running out of it’s might
nothing in the world seems right
buy me a rope I shall hang tight

late night thoughts
not allowing me to sleep

just a casual crush
somehow joined my crushed heart
she gave life to the poet inside me
whom I never would know if I hadn’t met her
she was like stars in the night sky
which brings comfort to distant observer
when I witnessed her heavenly presence
it was like the blind seeing, feeling light
the most beautiful flowers envied her beauty
she was as complex as a eels birth
that is what I liked about her!
Only her closest ones know about her
I tried my luck
unlike the scientists I had some success
success which gave and took everything simultaneously
I found a picture of her birthday
the first pic of her adorned in a red dress
glowing brighter than the ruby on her neck
the next picture was of her boyfriend
tall, long hairs and success all over him
next with their lips locked
which unlocked my mind into reality
just a casual crush or so I thought
somehow has crushed my heart harder

when silence starts to speak
the mind begins to think
about everyone who has called me a freak
and all the broken links
among them, one I particularly miss
to whom I never gave a goodbye kiss