i love you in your glory
i love you in your silly pajamas
i love you when you're happy
i love you when you hurt
i love you when you talk about the things you love
i love you when you are angry
i love you when you are lost
i love you in your morning drowsiness
i love you in your evening verve
i love you in your beauty
i love you in your mess
i love you, i love you, i love you.

We build cathedrals in homage to our pain,
attend masses that speak of never ending suffering
and a promise of an unfulfilled promise land and paradise.
We kneel before an altar to a God who surely is absent
I believe
but my heart is ever so weak.
My muscles are weak,
my soul so cold
and we bathe ourselves in the blood of Christ
in hopes of erasing all that we have done.
Misery loves religion,
religion loves misery.
Angels unreachable leave us to demons of our own,
“heaven” so far out of view.
Can you see and hear the agony beneath our skin?
We are so much more than our sins.
My body is a tomb
and my heart is a vessel.
Take me as yours,
baptize me in the rivers of Heaven,
and bathe me in the rivers of Hell.
I am human
I am dead.
I worship to find who I am.

i've picked up the pace
i've seen the beauty of the world once again
in the faces of strangers
and in the grittiest places
i feel alive,
and i wonder how i could have possibly
stopped seeing life through rose colored glasses.
time and time again i fall in love with the world
when i feel it loving me,
and what a splendid feeling
to be young and alive,
what a wonder it is
to be alive!

i belong to the daybreak
when humans with sleepy eyes
and mousy morning hearts
are brave enough to face
the scarily mundane world once again.

i belong to nature
to the hidden wonders of the world
there's unknown modern hanging gardens of babylon
and the secret sanctuaries
where the teenagers of the megalopolis
go to rest.

i belong to the ocean
in the deepest trenches
no man has seen
where it is quiet and still
and darkness reigns supreme.

i belong to outer space
in the galaxies who are
strangers we'd like to know
there's dark matter that swirls
space dust coalesces
and stars are born to die all over again.

i belong to the rain
when the sky cries and
the typhoons turn to drizzle
the water runs through
empty houses and thrift stores in the gutters
and on and on, to underground,
to God knows where.

i belong to the night
to the time when the busiest people
submit to slumber
but a few who are not
bothered by lightyears
sit by their windowsills
to watch the stars.

*i belong to the world
and the world belongs to me.

i
      DO
not
     WANT
to
     TURN
a
     YEAR
older
     AGAIN
i
     AM
still
      MESSY
and
      I
have
      NO
money.

maybe it's the weather
maybe it's because i'm turning a year older
but whatever it is, there is something
that gobbles me up from inside
and my bones get weaker and
my chest feels heavy and
i want to die

sunday to sunday i crawl to cling on to life
and i scrape my knees on the sidewalk
i think of tiny things that could possibly
change my tainted view of living,
i think about you.

i always hear your whispers,
they are snakes that slither from my ears
and they travel down the same way
your breath would on my neck.

i remember looking out the window
and i could feel your gaze in the shivers down my spine
and i'd tell the stars about my desires,
i'd tell them about you.