What does it mean to relax?
I think I've forgotten true comfort.
Fear is a constant hangnail,
and the summer heat makes my nerves kick in.
My teeth peel skin as I worry and my clothes dampen.
Drawing my own blood, it's a stupid self-induced sin.
Voices whisper in my ears.
"Watch your gaze, or they'll think you're up to something.
They'll assume the worst.
They won't see your chewed up fingers
and they'll only see the thirst.
Your lips parched from heavy breathing."
Who spoke first?
Was it me licking my lips-
causing questions within them?
Or am I the one asking?
Wondering like this when I should be relaxing?
"Close your eyes to heighten the panic,
seems like it's euphoric,
But you're really just frantic.
Open them but don't look at a soul."
I have eyes that penetrate
as deep as their goals.
They speak more than my clothes,
they speak more than my curves.
If I stare at them longer,
and release my nerves,
Misunderstood.
Misunderstood.
I'll relax when reality
And their thoughts become good.

Wine, spinning, we dine,
Candles and moon making love,
.  .  .  Sparkle in her eyes.

What will you say
When he stops breathing
Take the blame
Form a lie
Watch your torn children fall in line
Forget about him
Hide the tragedy
Let your teething guilt eat you alive?

Wait, I forgot mother
Do you ever eat?
Where did you go?
You're what I need
I yearn for a real mom
To tuck me in
To play a game, let me win
I'm a victim of your heartbreaking sin

Your starving toll to death
Became my triumphant downfall
People say I'll be okay
But what was the Devils price to pay?
A slap on the wrist
A depressed kid
Ending his life
Not wishing he never did

One day I realised,

I was only ever
afraid
of
myself.

It terrified me.

To the end of the earth, we tread.
A million miles pressed into our feet.
It ends here, where you rest your head,
weary and worn with defeat.

This landscape challenges all sanity.
Against the rocks, an intrinsic glare.
This is the end of all humanity
where your weight is mine to bear.