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I have a friend who is an alchemist

His name in grace was Alatar Clovis

Peddled potent potions and elixirs

For thieves, knights and peasants

Mortals who wish for reigns eternal

But alas Clovis himself knew that

His life and legacy will never last

For a curse was made, death was cast

From a witch who was once his lover;

'At last my love don't cower,

At last we'll be together.'
2023
Make sin, let your souls drain,

for plants wither without a little rain.

'Let justice be done

though the heavens fall'

For it is better to feel pain

Than to feel nothing at all.
2023
A baby cried, a baby cried
On it's little crib, it lied
A mother's call, he needs her now
To duty she comes, "don't cry
         my little one, I'm here now."

A young boy cried, a young boy cried
On his feet home with a bruise on his side
A mother's call, he needs her again
Mother cooked, "I better have
          his favorite again!"

A teenager cried, a teenager cried
He felt alone, no one cared
A mother's call, he needs her for the countless time
Mother left work, "to hell
              with the deadline."

A grown up cried, a grown up cried
There's no more job, no money left; he sighed
A mother's call, he drove home
Frail mother went to kitchen, " I should play
              our favorite song."

An old man cried, an old man cried
There's no time left, it is his final time
But his mother's calls, he recollect that night
"Dear mother always say: 'It's gonna
           be alright'"

With that

                he smiled,

              "I'm filled with mother's love"
(05 - 06 - 2017)
I paint through words
    Through words I show
    Through showing we connect
    Through connecting we understand
    Through understanding we unite
    Through uniting we create
    Through creating we live life
    Through living life we’ll paint words some more
(05 - 12 - 2017)
A man could either fear or obsess,

To the strength that knowledge posses,

When one wanders in the pursuit of truth,

Power dawns at the focal of its horizon.

One bright mind once bookishly inquired:

'How Much Land Does A Man Need?'

Which tells of a parable of a dead man

Who's fixated to 'what it is' than 'what it means'

The ouroboros of life is a deed of self-knowing

If you live your life eternally exactly as it is

Over and over again as punishment or bliss

Would you be afraid, or push forth knowing?
2023

Inspired by Friedrich Nietzche
Happiness is a song
Always worth singing
While sadness is a poem
That we read most alone

Anger is forced silence
Waiting to be burst
While surprise is a ride
A blessing or a curse?

And then there's disgust
The most we dont discuss
While admiration is a start
Of either one above
Calling a 'man' a beast

Is an insult to say the least

For the beast only knows how to tear.

A man on the other hand

in hatred, is an artist—

Imagine the countless ways

You annihilated your enemies

In your dark, mental festivities

You took guilty relish

in their sufferings.

'Our historical past-time

has always been

the direct satisfaction

of inflicting pain'
2023

Inspired by Dostoevsky, Brothers Karamazov
Writing at midnight
to help fall asleep,
is like dropping a soda
on a slide full of coffee
In his solitary study lies a tome

Of secrets, prose and a poem

Wisdom is sought into overdose

A grandiose for the weak and closed.

His life leads everywhere

For when his speech rises do beware

For a 'truth' so divine and rare

Can only be discarded not spared.

Half-intended words

Have the capacity to end worlds.

So read carefully between each line,

Before merciless intelligence ends our time.
2023

A Warning...
Nightingale, oh my blue nightingale

How wondrous your songs make my day

You let my troubles left astray

Oh nightingale, blue nightingale now off we sail


Through the seas and blues we together wander

Off and on shore storms yet your night songs provide me refuge

That's why I kept going each breakfast through supper

For the night I wait for your songs to cure my somber


Oh do I sometimes wonder why such night you only sing

But not for the day where my troubles are on its wing

Blue nightingale oh you're such full of mysteries

Yet I shan't bother for I cast you always my sea stories


After a long while my senses poked for you don't sing no more

Nor your colorful blue wings spread nevermore

The storms went, wrecked our ship now we're only together

My poor heart grieves, my poor soul hungers


Then I realized you only sing for the stars

Not for the morning sun, not for you, not for our poor ship and oh not for me

You've always dreamed to fly, fly away from here

To the stars that is, to the ambitious stars you always loved


Oh nightingale, blue nightingale from this false abode now I've awaken

From the lust o' spell I've once trapped from your songs forsaken

Now I have to let you go no breath ever taken

Away now you fly and let me forever alone freeze on this cold of ice


Oh nightingale, my blue nightingale now you're gone

But now I suppose, so am I

Nightingale, blue nightingale in my dreams you shall now sing and fly high

And now let I be put to sleep and alone sing this last cold sigh.
(2-2-2014)
Excuse my french but,
I have this little habit of
eating a bowl of nails faster,
than swallowing a drop
of the truth.
By the swords of a scholar

The world had heed by the golden scabbard.

Perpetual songs of the hammer forebode

Heroes sung of hymns to thee

A parchment is sealed, of greater unfold.

"For as lack of adornment is said to become some women, so this subtle oration, though without embellishment, gives delight."
2023
If songs could ****,

    This is how it shoots you:

"You're nobody 'til

    somebody loves you

And that somebody,

    is me.

       I love you."

Can such words be,

    As sweet as it's true?
2023
If I were to be dropped

   directly from above,


I'd talk to God first

   and pray to you last.


You're my hunger, my thirst

    my punishment recast.
We live in a vessel of dreams
Where thickets of our desires slithers
Underneath broken wings
As our heart's melody play and flutters

Stagnant as water as solid as fire
How could I fly in such a cold-grown fry
Beneath the bridge under the slims
Of cold and death of broken limbs

Living off the edge of the cliff
As my heart race and wonders
Cold as my body I am in lee
Why do we have to live daily in fear?
...

10-21-2019
There was once a fella named Jules

Who packed his bags, and got nothing to lose

Before he passed away,

His mother was sick

Dad went off his own way.


Jules went on to a life worth knowing;

That to love is to heal

And we learn by hurting

As he was leaving

He looked on a picture

Of a former lover who hate him

He felt nothing but one thing

That she loved him dearly.


He went to the bath

Closed the door behind his back

Laid down on the floor

With mom and dad.

As he stared at their lifeless bodies.

He shared them a laugh:

"Mom, dad... your son was bad"


Sirens wail from a distance

As I stared on the floor and caressed

My dear Jules' head

"Oh what fools we have become"

"I wish I was there"



...He did what he needs done
For he still does care.
Been keeping my dark thoughts far too long...
I just needed a release from everything.

Everyone please take good care of yourselves.
I don't want you to beg

   I want you to listen

  That was you then

  Trapped in a lion's den.

I want you to think

  Get out of that brink

  That hatred, that guilt

  Won't wipe those spilled milk

Act, speak, carry-on

  Always remember

  I'm also a sinner

  My life did went on

You're still my dear friend

  But time has changed us

  The wound was mended

  All except my trust.
2023
The day will be night
And the night will be day

The plant's drowning with tears
Don't water it anymore

Right now sleep for tomorrow;
And let the sun mend that sorrow
Parts I, II & III will never see the light of day...

2016
Born and raised
Loved and hugged
My mother's love
As gentle as a dove

I'm my own wallflower
And she's the garden
The more I shrink in the corner
The more she colors my somber

Even though time rebels
As I darken my vessels
I know in my heart
You are my light in the dark

So this dear mother
I say as your daughter
I love you, with all of me
For you've helped me grow my seeds

This is your day
In this garden where we stay
I'll love you all the way
Happy Mother's Day
(05 - 07 - 2017)
I used you
To fix me
To nourish me
To water me.

Years passed,
Now I blossom
And you rust
Was it right?

That you gave me
Your trust?
A poet's life is that of tragedy

Once born, its fate is sealed.

But what is fate to a baloney?

To a chronic liar; a phony?

But all it tells is constant truth

No wonder Eve bit the fruit.
2023
Beauty is a margin

of what is sweet

or what is rotten.

A majesty of remembrance,

through time shall be forgotten.

If one took a bite

Of its lustful sight

a taste of what might,

could it be sour or right?
2023
It's not too late
to make amends
But it's now too early
For us to be friends.
In every step of days,

is her fall from grace

yet waning beauty

brings wisdom and bliss.

Her autumn for me

is a second spring,

where every leaf is a flower

that blooms from within.
2023

Inspired by Camus
What is longing?
Why do we miss?
Of sorrows and grief?
Or simply for bliss?

A lover, a friend
A relative, a family
Or simply just someone
Who made us feel happy

It can break it can bleed
Could make us all plead
For we always want better
Than the ones we have hither

Despite of all that
They may have hurt bad
It's all in the past
And it's me I still have
Life is so generous

Ever so full of gifts to spare;

Ever so rich of privileges that glamours;

Over-flowing chances that fills up this fine young soul to give a full flare

Yet it's so generous that it gives also "lemons"

Life oh life,

Why "lemons"?

I grew up knowing,

Lemons are best served cold

Especially in every summer for those who thirsts for such juicy quench

While feets're on sands and the kingly sun's overhead

But why "lemons"?!

Maybe it wasn't just lemons picked up from metro market

But lemons from life

Then I suppose it does'nt matter anymore

I guess what matters is I have these...

I have "life" and I have "lemons"
12-29-14
For life is so meaningful

We smile

For life is so meaningless

We cry.

As this empty space embraces me

I...
2023
I lived my life knowing:
That love is blind
That love won't make you fine
That love is merely just distracting

But alas here I am I stand trial
All in the face of love
A victim of love
But with no hint of denial

It is real yes, oh it is such heaven on earth
This love I felt, I feel for real
You made it happen, made me feel
What a lovely day everyday it has been

Everyday you are my cup of tea
Everyday I think of you and me
Everyday there are no worries
Everyday you are my peace, my whole delight

Your hug that i always long for
Each day and each night
You give me your favorite songs
How i long for you, all of the time

Though with every too much sunshine
There is a little rain, a downpour
Oh what a time to be alive
It all went wet, it rained, it poured

But do always remember my love
There's no rainbow without a little rain
Even if the morrow is barren of promises
Nothing shall forestall my return

I'll always bring you with me
Remember oh my dear love
As green as the grass, as blue as the sky
You'll always be my green tea, my hug in a cup

I'll wait for you in a café some day
And some day we'll together drink
That matcha that serves as a memory of I and thee
A matcha of you and me
dedicated this one to my past lover. We had it great, we had it worse. Then decided we live in two different worlds.
Make it happen!
Yet not forgotten!
Let your hearts loosen!
All yourselves forgiven!

You are the maker of makers!
The master of masters!
Let those words not stutter!
Say it, SAY IT altogether!

Fear not the wrath of the day,
Nor the dark where you lay,
Have faith as bright as day!
Let the gospel take the slay!

Of the evil, of the temptation,
All the deceitful sensation,
Get out! fight! lead the nation!
Save the world from damnation!
04-11-2016
If I could die everyday

   and live another day

I'd choose to be

   as close to you

'til your feelings

   melt away.

With every lick,

   with every breath

I'll be your treat,

   and pain to bear.
2023
Light-year by light-year
Through countless smiles and tears
I'll find a way to make you smile
And everything will be fine

Mile by mile
Surely time does fly
Promises I made and kept
Never did I left nor slept

Kilometer by Kilometer
Seems like everything else matters
The world is alive the world is day
All through the night, I never left but stayed


Yard by Yard
You never seem to be sad
Look at the stars look at the moon
I'll be there, and always be soon

Meter by meter
You seem to be bitter
I guess it's just me
Or my questionable pleas

Feet by feet
The world is going to deep
Wait wait, what is happening?
Where are our lives leading?

Centimeter by centimeter
Time seems to litter
How are you, are you ok?
I left myself astray

Inch by inch
I'm getting close, MY HEART pinched
"Closer, closer, closer"
She said never.
When distance and love meets half way

04-10-2016
Together—I felt pain,

Alone—you felt joy.

Inward—heart's in flame,

Outward—the mind went lame.

And so—

Yesterday—she promised

Today—he lied.

Near—we idled by,

Afar—they said goodbye.
2023
Your honeyed gaze

Melted diamonds

My mind's encased

Heart's in ribbons.


Your puckered lips

Like Emperor Tulips

As gentle and fine

As aged wine.


With every stroke

Of colors in yolk

Beauty beyond words

Is forever yours.
You claim to love nature

But it never loved you!

You deemed it your saviour

Yet ****** is its precursor!

O poor! O wretched humans!

Your power, your genius: your nuance.


Dear Mother was never your mother

Nor ever will it be your father

For it is a long forgotten answer—

To your mindless blunders.

My kin who all have suffered,

Their hatred shall be your supper.
2023
[Monday, 8:49am...]

Keyboards hurriedly crack and click
As my mind sends me adrift
Among these papers and clips
A photo of you I kissed.

It's perhaps a beautiful day it is
It's a beautiful day, with you I miss...
01-10-2019
Aching chambers
Sullen froths
The raven angers
As hope is lost
Consumed oh hallowed mind
As the feeble and broken, cried

Beneath empty boardwalks
Townsmen bleeded across
Still I find myself in gawk
As the dawn of man drew close
Reality found me encased
In an existence duly erased

"Im the only one here right?"
Says a feminine voice
It was of a lost lover
To whom I never knew.

In a plane of consciousness
Submerged in repose
I sat there, cornered, enthralled
A living dream I am in
A dream I never arose.
Inspired from a midnight nightmare and a day-dream...
We sat on a table
Drew cards and called
You got a pair of Aces
I got 7, Queen of spades

I guess with my hand
I'm a lucky girl you have
Little did I know
You got bullets on my back

That's what you get
For the risk of a bet
And that's what I regret
That I took you for granted
A dreary night of inferno--1941

noises of bullets and hand grenades came flying as one.

The moon lit nearing midnight,

of course it's the time of freight.

I found myself anxiously descending the wooden staircase,

I feel my brows dampen as my heart race.

Taking one last step from this wooden step,

to the numbing cold of the cement.

I knew someone there sensed,

my weary-vulnerable presence.

Then came a spine-chilling radio-crack,

"Abort, abort!" it said with a manic crack.

There and there I heard of nothing,

but hurried footsteps as it sounds escaping.

A long second passed silence ruled then followed the sky,

dropping frenzied screech in my ear like a wandering fly.

All in the darkness came white and last of me remember,

neighboring plank woods, and rooftops are in ashes from an ember.

I knew then and there in my slumber,

that war is over.

Times passed I knew after all my eyes were blinded,

by a droplet of explosion which costed me a life-time incapacitated.

I thought with all-hell surpassed I have finally met freedom,

yet still I died sitting in this dark park of boredom.

There on my last anxious sighs seated blindly on a warm wooden bench,

beside a cold-cemented statue of a false hero drenched.

Nearing midnight I knew I heard in my mind,

Uttering a hungry cry saying that "war is blind!"
12-29-14
Amidst a ****** of declines

Lie heaps of somber morrow.

Leered upon by a pack of morose

Lured by a school of utter dispose

Through tides of hungry Prides

My gaggles of  dreams took flight;

My shiver of desires slept the night

A congregation of mind's elation.

An arbitration of puns and nouns

With a sense of little to an ounce

Is all this morning ever took

For a smile to look good.
2023
Shaking, I slowly approached.
"Hi" I said, shaking, only croaked.
"Would you like to take a walk?"
As composed as she is,
We left-off, we talked.

"I am so sorry."
"Do you still have my drawing?"
"Yes, I kept them with me."
"Actually, I'm still mad at you"
"You have every right to."

On that day, I shed some tears
From past mistakes, I still regret.
When I broke her heart and left.
She now loves someone,
Who wiped her tears.

Five years, what could it have been?
If only choices can be selected again
I'll do anything to hold her then.
To hug her close, never leave her alone.

You don't have to forgive me
I hope you live life fully.
Here I sit admittedly,
"I still love you dearly."
I write whenever

it is necessary.

But what is

a necessity

to a fool

who lavish himself

with poetry?
2023
In this life, existence is competition
And conflict will always set motion
For chaos is the natural order
And change comes right after

That's life, its natural state
And if one of the two dominates
Balance shall tilt and tumble over
Weighing the world above our shoulders

Maybe that's why we always seek
Someone to live forever, for keeps
We hunger for love, peace and more
Also conflicts for us to grow

We want to see clearly
So we pass through prairies
Of burning grass and warm sands
To find our own peace at hand

Such is the way we live
All we could do is believe
"Bashed to the head

By a blunt cold wrench."

The inspector concluded:

"It's Howard Bent."

No bullets were spent

At home he went

His trousers were wet

"Fear for his life, he felt"

Hid under the bed

A scratch over the forehead

"My god what a mess,"

The servant gagged and left.

Suddenly up overhead

A piano played in clefs

Swiftly we paced, upstairs we fled

A sibling of his: it's William Bent.

"We were told you were tone deaf,

But played the piano well?"

The Inspector interjected,

As William went ahead.

"Dear brother, hello

have you taken your meds?"

Upset and dejected I said:

"THERE'S A DEAD MAN DOWN THERE"

"Good evening Mr. Bent,"

Said a calm voice downstairs

"Have you finished with your toys?"

It's my lovely: Rose Taylor-Bent.

"MY DEAR GET OUT OF HERE"

I screamed, with sweat I'm drenched.

"William, grab his hand!"

A needle pierced, it bled.

Somewhere out of nowhere

As I slumber and dreamt

Enters a man painted in red

A figure approached and wept

"I thought we're playing?" he said,

"but why did you hit me instead?"

"BECAUSE YOU'RE ALWAYS AHEAD"

I scorned violently to the dead.

"But I am you, and you are me,

It's me and you, together, we're free!"

I looked through a mirror

And then and there I faced horror.

A man with no lips, no eyes, no nose

I woke up and hurriedly arose,

Facing the face of my dear Rose:

"My sweetest, my love,

don't leave me no more"

As I gently stood

A mirror I took

To my face he stared:

It's Howard Bent.
2023
I reek of famine and havoc
I infest upon the masses
I choose not one but all classes
All windows sealed, doors all locked

Through these emptied streets
I strut forth, the people bends its knees
Behold my wrathful grand
As you close your folds at my command

As the living eye gazes upon me
All they could fathom is but a reflection of theirs
Reflections from irresponsible, greedy heirs
Of the thrones where they drink merrily now bare

Behold for your capital punishment
You filth of the human kind
Now with all power due to you
I put on my crown as I relish the view
20 March 2020
(COVID-19 took over earth)

"It is not the virus who'll **** us, but us the people and our irresponsibility"
Long live the men

battered and opressed

Long live the King

old, frail and dying.


Hail to the Queen

talked to by the keen

Bless all the women

whose knees both bent.


By my Royal decree

Of chaos and glee

Let all ye be free

From this broken dream.
Greatness arise from the grave of shame.


Like a  hero of a nation whom

shall be the enemy of worlds

hedonistic in power

guised as a seeker of truth.

The ****** then is celebrated hatred.

A peace to one's kin secured into satisfaction

in exchange therefore is piety to chaos

'for the sake of mankind,' he says,

'thus my humanity is the cost.'


The overman from the future concludes:



That 'Whatever is done for love

will always occur beyond good and evil'

a hero in essence shall play god

through love that transcends all morality.
2023
Within a subtle distance

I'll feel your pain in silence

As I move in a single file

Love for you is endless fire
2023
If poems

  don't rhyme

     it doesn't mean

        that the sun

            won't shine.

For sometimes

   the best

     of  combinations

       are of evil

         and benign.
2023
I have seen the stars but not the night
Neither did the moon nor the sun lit a shining bright
Next thing I knew I was laying on this tree of white
Just to loom about til the butterflies took their flight

Now as I sat there waiting to arise
Someone threw me a thorn from a cold velvet rose
Never did I hesitate to put that thorn on my brows
For I knew who was whom and never uttered a close.

And then suddenly I came accepting the truth;
A truth that once bloom from a never lasting loop
Yes I know!
For it must be a part of my root
For the last thing I knew,
I am now the tree;
Once that white-flaked fruit
(01-22-2014)
On my way to a path

I was met by a hermit

Accompanied by its music which

Unlike a sculpture nor a painting,

With their mimicking stagnation,

The music flowed through time.

The hermit then asked,

'What is the joy of silence?'

With the cold of that ember evening

I dared not to answer

For in silence, the truth there dwells.

'An admirable integrity!'

The hermit jovially exclaimed

'For the path of nothingness,

after all is reserved for the Will,

the Will to beauty, the Will to be.'

Without a moment to ponder

I thereby entered the void

As the Hermit's music

Went into a glistening crescendo

The void joined along an innuendo

It is fact that with a baby's cry

Along comes with it a signal of life

The void became a myth and a lie

Of the world before I came to be

When I saw my mother's eyes.
2023

A poem heavily inspired by my introductory studies of Schopenhauer: 'The World as Will and Representation'
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