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fm May 2019
i want to die.
i want to stop living.
i want the breath to leave my lungs as if it were pulled straight from my body by harsh hands that destroy everything they hold.
but i know that i can change the world.
and i know that there are people that need me.
that need the breath in my lungs to inflate their own in order for them to keep surviving.
for them to keep living another day.
so i’ll wait.
i’ll wait for their weakened knees to straighten out and walk the miles to find their future and live the life they were always meant to live.
without me.

but i still want to die.
fm May 2019
the first five days i remembered the door you kissed me on.
i remembered your favorite songs, your favorite foods, and i remembered the rain.
the first five days i remembered the glasses perched on your nose and i remembered the taste of your lips after you had drank a bottle of wine.
how sweet they tasted.
sweeter than the drawl of your words and the fingertips that traced the lines of ink on my arm.
the first five days i remembered our promised plans that we made.
the trips we hadn’t taken and the movies we hadn’t watched.
i remembered how it felt to hear you say the words ‘i’ and ‘adore’ and ‘you’ all in the same sentence.
i remembered how it felt when i left.
i remembered why i left.

on the sixth day i remembered that the door you kissed me on was just a door before i left
and would continue to be a door after.
  Oct 2018 fm
Anonymous
This one is for my pretty girls
For the girls who count calories
And tell their friends they aren’t hungry
So they can see their pretty bones
This one is for my pretty girls
The girls who sit shaking on their bathroom floors
With pain in their hearts and knifes in their hands
So they paint pretty marks on themselves
This one is for my pretty girls
Those who were born boys
And get slammed into lockers and yelled slurs at
Yet still try their hardest to be
One of the pretty girls they’re meant to be
This one is for my pretty girls
The ones who always looks uncomfortable in class
Sitting by the man who makes them queasy
So they don’t make a pretty fuss
This one is for my pretty girls
Who sneak out to pride parades
And ignore the word *** tattooed into their binders
So they could love other pretty girls
This one is for my pretty girls
Whose arms flinch when grabbed
And bodies shudder when voices raise
So they can be daddy’s pretty girl
This one is for my pretty girls
Who don’t talk about after parties
And don’t tell their friends or parents
So they aren’t called pretty little *****
This one is for my pretty girls
The ones who tempt fate and take pills
Take jokes about hating themselves too far
So they can try and get their pretty sleep
This one is for my pretty girls
The ones who cry out when they need help
But no one answers because no one hears them
And they can’t speak
And they can’t breathe
And there’s tears rolling down their cheeks
But they do nothing
This one is for my broken girls
My girls like me
This one is for my strong girls
My girls that haven’t given up
This one is for the pretty girls
My beautiful, beautiful girls
  Oct 2018 fm
RJ Days
Girls will be girls
they’ll sing and dance
so boys can’t help but grab
girls right in their underpants

Girls will be girls
they’ll flirt and sass
but they never ****
‘cause they aren’t crass

Girls will be girls
they’ll study hard
to ****** the boys
who’ll mow the yard

Girls will be girls
they’ll say no and stop
but we won’t believe them:
the boys are cops!

Girls will be girls
they’ll cook and clean
and raise the kids
but must stay lean

Girls will be girls
they’ll work all day
and take home just part
of what boys are paid

Girls will be girls
they’ll talk and chat
but then get hysterical
when boys call them fat

Girls will be girls
they’ll wear nice dresses
and never soil them
wiping up boys’ messes

Girls will be girls
they’ll run and vote
while boys drink beer
and win and gloat

Girls will be girls
and we know what that means:
they must always smile
and never scream

Girls will be girls
so let’s hope and pray
that girls are girls enough to save
this ****** up world
we boys have made.
  Aug 2018 fm
ls
They say never to underestimate
the rage of a woman
but what we should not underestimate
is the touch of a woman
for that is what will break you
sending you insane
with desire.  

Spinning through all seven deadly sins.

From gluttony through to lust
pride through to envy
anger through to greed
leaving you at sloth
avoiding all else that matters
craving only;
the touch of a woman.
fm Aug 2018
i will not like you
i promise i won’t
with shaking hands
i’ll confess that i don’t

i may like your eyes
and i may like your talk
i really like your voice
and how you use it to mock

you sing even though you can’t
and you’re funny even when you’re not
you’re quiet and reserved
at least that’s what i thought

i do not like you
even though i could
i’m just a little broken
but i know that i would

we’re a lot alike
which is good for a friendship
that’s all i can think about
we’re not ready for a relationship

the more i write though i realize
that maybe i like you a little
you’re easy to talk to and
it doesn’t feel like a riddle

okay so maybe it’s a lot
but that doesn’t matter
you’d be a great companion
but you should really be the latter

i do like you
it’s unfortunately so
but it’s not meant to be
i wish it were though
i’ve got a crush
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