i see her
through her shadows
and in her darkness
i still see her
light

it shines from
around
her clouds
like silver

she is more than
sunlight

she is warmth
and love

she is peace
and comfort

so i told her
'my love,
even in
your darkest days
you have no idea
how much
your love
warms my skin

and your beautiful
heart
lights up my soul'

she smiled
from behind
her leaden sky
and kissed me
softly
in the way
only
an 'i love you'
could be kissed

and my heart
all at once
filled with
her sunshine
and
became hers

you know the look
the look
when you feel eyes on the side of your face
but you're not completely sure
so you turn
instantly catching them
looking
their addictive
ice blue eyes
staring
and then quickly they're gone
looking somewhere else
like the floor or  
out the window or
pretending to be deep in thought
but
you know that they've been looking
because you've caught them twice before

Oh darling child
so young
so innocent
How i do envy that
Oh darling child
Promise me you will never grow up
Please stay young Sweet little girl
                                                            ­  15 years later
Oh darling Child
That innocence has faded
The youth is now Maturity
The Adorable little girl i once knew
Faded into a Beautiful Woman
Oh darling child
I love you

Im ready
Ready to give up
Ready to stay broken
Ready to stay on the ground
Ready to not get up
To let God push me back into my place
Ready to stop

Just kidding

I ready to fight
Im ready fall for what i believe
Ready to live
Ready Cry
Ready to Smile
Ready to scream
I wont give up
I have fought to long
Im not ready to give up
                                          Not to myself

I took a big risk
being the first to say
"I love you."
But your silence
was the only reply I needed.
I understand and I
won't force love upon you
and maybe it was too soon,
but when you've got a
mind like mine,
things turn rather absurd,
and the words you utter more
than any other words
are "I love you" and "sorry."
So, I'm sorry that I finally confessed
the words that have been forever
sleeping in my chest,
But maybe I just hoped
that you'd be able to break the spell..
I digress.
What matters is the words
have been said,
they will not die with me
when I take my last breath.

I am honestly so insecure. But I couldn't give a **** about what anyone else thinks, what anyone else says. I wish you'd try harder for me. Today, I even brought some extra snacks, just for you, because I know you're always hungry at lunch and quite frankly, it broke my heart that I couldn't help you because I'd already eaten. But of course, you never got to eat, or even KNOW of the extra snacks I brought, just for you. I even sneaked an extra of my mum's favourite chocolate biscuits, the ones she says to not take unless we ask...and I didn't ask for the extra one. But you know why you never got to eat it? Because my best friend dared me to eat what I'd brought for you. She didn't think you deserved it. Maybe I should stop trying so hard. And maybe you should give me back the leash for my emotions because you **** them up.

I don't think
there was any other
way
to have described
him
I could have
compared him
to the heavens
above
And to the stars
in the night sky
To joy
To love
and beautiful
blessings bestowed
But
he
Gave me
peace
deep
within in my bones
and a belonging
holding softly
to my heart
And so
i find
the only
way
I could have
described
him
was to call him
*home